The Forgotten Games
by Inner Sanctuary
Summary: All Lily has ever wanted to do is dance. When she is chosen to be a tribute in the 1st Annual Hunger Games even that is lost. Her father hates her, and her family is dead. She can definitely win these Games, but the question is, will she want to? She soon comes to find that nobody really wins these Games. It's my first fanfiction so I hope you guys like it!
1. Background

It has been a few years since I have seen sunlight, and it burns my skin. I can't lash out at anybody, or else they will put me in a straitjacket just like that little girl yesterday..

My father, stepmother, and stepsiblings keep an eye on me, but otherwise keep their distance. I don't expect any less, they all hate me. My stepmother taught her children to fear me; she blames me for everything that those two do. They could commit murder in front of 50 eye witnesses, and she could still blame me for it. What's worse is that my own father doesn't even defend me. Back when my real family was alive, he might have defended me. But then again, I wouldn't have been in this situation back then.

It has been 5 years since the Capitol has destroyed the rebel cause, along with most of the people involved in it. I still weep on the inside when I think of it; it's the only reason my family is dead. I'm just a painful reminder to my father of what he used to have, so he has shut me out completely ever since they locked up every family in the district. He found his new wife there, and they had 2 children, twins. Esther and Aaron, who might as well stab me to death for all anyone in my family cares.

There have been rumors about the release, and my friends and I talk about it all of the time. My friends are only a select few that helped me keep a large group of children alive during the rebellion. I would trust my life to them. My closest friend, Janice, finds me now and says, "Lily, they are letting us go to school and live our lives normally again!"

"Janice, I will _never_ be able to live my life normally again."

"Right…"

That was 3 years ago when I was 12. Now here I am, with a much larger pool of friends. I have learned how to cover up what I feel on the inside, even if I do say what's on my mind. My father has taken up a job in fishing again, but I can never watch him go out on his new boat. It looks too much like the one that was destroyed 8 years ago.

We are some of the wealthier people in District 4, and my stepmother takes advantage of that. She has never had to lift a finger in her life, and spends so much that I had to get a job to support the family. I'm a mail carrier that is always running around delivering messages throughout the District, and I'm pretty sure she made me take this one is because I will learn all of the latest gossip in town.

"Lily!" Janice shouts and I smile. She is still my closest friend.

"What? Are you going to make me run all the way to the other side of the District again just to pet someone's dog for you again?"

"That was just once! And no, that's not why I'm here. I wanted to ask you if you want to come over to my house tonight to watch this special announcement the Capitol has to make."

"Sure, when does it start?"

Even with my job as messenger, I can't miss a special announcement from the Capitol or I might get imprisoned.

"I'm not sure, around 7 or something."

"Wait to go Janice; I'll just be there at 6:30."

"You want to get there early because you want to see Alexander at sports practice, don't you?" She squeals.

"Not so loud you twit!"

"Sorry!"

"And the answer is yes, thank you very much."

A woman carrying a heavy package hobbles up to me, so Janice just smiles and runs off back to her house.

That night I don't see Alexander, but I don't mind since he never would have even noticed me anyways. He's always had his eye on Breeze Climpf, who has always been better at talking to boys that me.

I reach Janice's house and we settle down and gossip until the program starts. At exactly 7 o'clock, the seal of Panem fills the screen and the anthem starts playing.

An image of the President, whose name nobody can ever remember since there have been so many over the course of the past few years, fills the screen and I gasp. He looks like a bird of prey, which might swoop down for the kill at any given point in time.

"Citizens of Panem, we have finally decided on a punishment suitable to the crimes in which you have committed. This deal will be known as the Treaty of Treason, and has been voted upon by your own leaders." He pauses to let this sink is, as though we are too stupid to have understood it. "It has been decided that the 12 Districts of Panem shall offer up as tribute one male and one female between the ages of 12 and 18 to be prepared to _fight to the death._" I feel lightheaded at the prospect of my being eligible to participate in this sick way of control they have conjured up. They are weak, spineless, cowards for targeting the nation's children. "These children will be picked in an annual Reaping that will occur once every year at random from a pool of every child in that District. The first Reaping in history shall occur in 2 weeks. May the odds be in your favor." Then they show the seal, play the anthem, and the screen goes blank.

Beside me, Janice faints. Her mother catches her, and I try to wake her up. "Janice, don't make me fetch a pail of ice cold water." I say, and she begins to stir.

"Don't, please, don't…"

"Okay, I won't then. Besides, I have to go back home, I'll see you.."

"See you." She replies.

I go to stand, but my legs are like gelatin. When I almost collapse her older brother, who is 17, goes to help me, but I wave him away. "I can't lean on you the whole way home. I need to do this alone." He nods, and I am able to get to my feet again. When their house is far out of sight, I start to run towards the one place that I feel at least a bit safer, the school yard. Here I dance out my emotions, and when I hear a rustling in the bushes nearby I'm at the position of the watcher within seconds. "Who are you, and what do you want?" I ask. It's dark, so I can't see their face.

"It's Alexander O'Neil. I went on a walk after the announcement and I saw some movement in the school yard, so I thought I'd check it out."

I immediately back away and say, "Well, I've got to go now.. May the odds be in your favor." Then I'm on the path to my house before he even has time to say, "Goodbye, Lily Gallina.."

I just wave over my shoulder, and then Alexander is out of sight.


	2. The Reaping

**Chapter 2**

I pull on a sapphire blue dress and tie my hair into a ponytail with a matching ribbon. The dress has short sleeves and reaches only to my knees. It's the most expensive thing that I own, since almost every penny goes to my stepmother. Sometimes, I wish that I could tell my father what she's doing to him, but then I remember that he has shut me out, so I do the same. I pull on white flat soled shoes, and then I'm off to Janice's house. I don't want to spend possibly my last day in District 4 at home with my so-called family.

I knock on the door and her brother, Daimon, answers the door. He ruffles my hair and says "Good luck today squirt."

"May the odds be in your favor, you oaf." I answer; Janice's family has always been more like a family to me than my actual family.

He smiles and then lets me in. "Janice! I've come to bring you eternal joy and happiness!" I shout.

"Shut up Lily!" She shouts back down, and then I hear her footsteps pounding down the stairs.

When she sees the bundle I'm holding, she immediately asks "What's in there?"

"Breakfast," I say then I open the bundle displaying honey, tea leaves, and bread, and eggs.

She squeals with delight, and immediately sets about making a meal out of it. I smile and think, _She has always loved cooking..._

I strike up a conversation with Daimon, and we keep the subject of it away from the Reaping today. Daimon is a tall and thin boy; well man really, has dark hair, piercing dark eyes, and tan skin. He's extremely handsome, even for our District's standards, and we might have had a chance if I wasn't his sister's best friend. I couldn't ever be able to think of him as a lover, especially since he's like an older brother to me.

We all have a meal of scrambled eggs, toast, and tea with honey. Their parents come down after a few minutes and herd us down to the square for the Reaping.

"Janice," I whisper along the way to the square.

"Mhm," she answers distractedly.

"If I'm our district's tribute, don't make a scene or anything. Please, just accept it."

"WHAT? HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO ACCEPT SOMETHING LIKE THAT?"

"I'm just saying, especially since when your pet fish died you locked yourself in your room and cried for days. There isn't going to be anything you can do about it."

She just gives a sniff and says "Nils was the best fish a girl could ever have. You wouldn't understand."

"Settle down ladies, no need to fight over a fish." Daimon intrudes on our conversation and soon we are all playfully arguing.

We reach the square and immediately quiet down. We check in and we group up by age. Older kids are in the front, while the younger ones are toward the back.

"Just promise that you will NOT make a scene, Janice."

She sees the steady look in my eyes and immediately nods. I see Breeze Climpf and her band of friends pointing at us and snickering. I want to go up to her and slap her, just to see how fast that smirk can be wiped off of that face.

"Don't worry about them Lily," Janice reassures me, as if reading my thoughts. "They're only jealous because you've always been prettier than them, with that beautiful skin of yours, your hair, and those amazing blue eyes!"

"Thank you, Janice. You're just as beautiful as I am, if not more." On regular days I would put up a fight about my supposed beauty, but now isn't the time. I've even been told by many boys at school that I'm the most beautiful girl in the District. As _if._ Besides, a girl can't go through school without having suitors, or at least several boys hitting on them.

"Welcome, welcome to the 1st Annual Hunger Games." Say Ademia Perez, the escort assigned to our district by the Capitol. She goes on to explain everything that was explained 2 weeks ago, so I zone out until she says, "Ladies first." Please don't be me, please don't be me…

"Breeze Climpf." Ademia calls out.

Then it hits me. She's going into that arena to face her death. I don't care how much bad blood we have between us, nobody, not even her, deserves that.

Before common sense can find its way into my mind I do just about the stupidest thing in my life. I volunteer as my district tribute.

You can easily hear the distress, anguish, and other emotions that battle constantly for superiority in my voice. Breeze hasn't even moved from her spot, and she's leaning on her friend for support. When I volunteer she just gapes at me and I walk up to the stage on legs that so desperately want to collapse underneath me.

Why would I do this? The glory? The pity? Or do I know somehow that I'm going to die soon anyways? I don't let these thoughts show on my face, nobody will know what I'm thinking. I cover all emotion in a mask of boredom, and take my place standing in front of everyone. _Stand tall and proud Lily Pad, because the way a woman holds herself tells people a lot about her. _The words of my mother echo in my head, even after all of these years…

I refuse to cry, no matter what. Tears will only give my family satisfaction, and I'm not giving them that one piece of me. Surely, they have taken every other part of me by now. I can't even give myself that satisfaction that comes with tears.

Other than keeping my family away from my emotions, I know that I have to be strong for someone else. The thing is that I don't know who exactly. Myself? My dead grandmother? Anybody?

The male tribute is announced next by Ademia. This time I do let my emotions flicker across my face, if only for just a second. It isn't just a name that I recognize; it's a name that my heart skips a beat at.

In the arena to get back home to my friends, I'll have to kill Alexander O'Neil.

_**Hey guys, first author's note.(:**_

_**Okay, so do you like it so far? And sorry for not updating for a little while, I've gotten kind of lazy lately. All of the homework from my teachers isn't exactly helping either…**_

_**At least there's only a few weeks left of school! Why am I talking about school now…?**_

_**I was hoping to make this chapter like an 'emotional rollercoaster' for everyone, so did I accomplish that? Just wondering…**_

_**Reviews make me happy, so please give me some feedback! Thanks.(:**_


	3. Goodbye

**Chapter 3**

Why did I even have to volunteer? No, don't look back at this decision. Don't regret it. In District 4 I have no one other than Janice and her family. Even they will forget me after a time. So why do I have a gut clenching feeling of remorse for having to leave?

I gather my thoughts for the end of the speech our mayor gives. I never bothered to learn his name, it never seemed important before. Now I find it extremely important, but apparently he has no name tag. _They really should get name tags on those guys…_

We are now supposed to shake hands with our dstrictmate, but when our hands meet, I can't help but pull him close and go into his arms. Thankfully, he doesn't push me away. Is it because he feels as broken and unstable as I do right now, or is this a part of his strategy? I honestly don't care right now, but I'm sure that Breeze Climpf feels the exact opposite about this hug that I do.

A group of white-uniformed peacekeepers comes to spoil the moment. They take us to the Justice Building to say what might very well be our final goodbyes. Time to make sure that I won't have anything to look forward to if I win. Even with my friends, they can't cancel out the negativity of my family. Nobody can. Throughout all of my goodbyes I am a total bitch to everyone. It hurts them all, but I can't think of a better way of doing it. If I were to tell them that I was going to die in that arena, then they would mourn me. I can't stand seeing the people I love being sad, so if they hate me then they won't be saddened by my death.

Faces flash by. Friends. 'Family'. Acquaintances. All betting that I am going to win, more for their sake than my own. That is, until I play out my plan. It's not like I ever stood a chance of winning anyways, right?

Well, there always is a chance of me winning. _But at what price?,_ I think ruefully.

Then an unexpected face shows up. It's Breeze, but her usual entourage of friends is missing. _I saved your life by volunteering for you. You're welcome. Now leave._

"You know, what you did back there…." She begins. I don't let her finish though.

"Save it." I snap. "I don't want your pity, your gratitude, or anything from you. I did this for me. So I could come home to a life of leisure and luxury."

She looks absolutely stunned by my outbreak. Her mouth is hanging open, but she wisely closes it. Without a word, she gets up and walks out of the room, knocking her chair over in the process.

Good riddance. Besides, I can't really blame her. Looks like I went a bit overboard on bitch mode though… Not my problem.

There aren't any more visitors after her that I can really remember. My mind is a complete and utter mess. All of this was too much to handle, and the next thing I know I'm getting out of the car at the train station.

I plaster on a fake, but dazzling, smile for the cameras. If I'm going to play these Games then I'm going to want to have sponsors. After all, they _will _be the people that pay for all of the gifts that could easily save my life in that arena.

The past 2 weeks in school have basically been Hunger Games orientation. Instead of regular lessons, we learned the rules of the game.

When I see the 2 people designated to be our mentors I almost ask Ademia if this is a joke or something. It obviously isn't.

When I finally realize that this is a cruel trick from the Capitol's part meant to unnerve us, I almost faint. Everyone believed them dead, especially me. Furlow Calvarez and Mary Lafray are my 2 mentors.

They aren't that extraordinary. Well, that is, except for the fact that they are 2 of District 4's own rebel leaders.

_**Sorry it's short. .**_

_**I'm just glad that I'm updating more often… (:**_

_**Like it? Review it, I love having other people's opinions. PM me if you have any suggestions.**_

_**Thanks!**_


	4. Barriers

**Chapter 4**

I feel like I'm in a living nightmare. First those prissy Capitol class bastards have to go and give everyone false hope, letting us live out our lives normally, then drop the full force of reality on us. Now this. They really have no hearts, and are capable of anything. _Well so am I…_

Instead of running, or screaming to escape all of this, my smile widens as I greet my mentors. I'm truly disgusted with myself, but I refuse to let it show.

Everyone except for me stands stiffly and lets the cameras absorb them, letting the Capitol citizens take a nice good look at them. I on the other hand wave and flirt with the cameras for a few minutes, and then we're on the train and headed to the Capitol. I stand at the window of a room, saddened when all things familiar and comforting disappear. I truly hate this place, but it's the only home I've ever had. Besides, it's not all bad. I still have places that I have always shared with my brother, sister, mother, and grandmother. It's too bad that they're dead.

That's it. I'm going to return back to my home. Just to hold on to those last pieces of my dead family that I have.

Soon, I feel moisture on my face. Tears that hold every emotion that I've felt all day, rushing down my face in the form of silent tears. I don't bother wiping them away, I've earned them.

When I feel his strong, muscular arms wrap around my waist from behind, I don't resist. I've wanted this for far too long to push him away. If it was any other boy I would have slapped them by now.

"Thanks for the hug back there. I needed it." He says, his voice cracking with emotion. Is it just me, or is his face damp as well?

"No problem. I needed _someone _to help hold my world together." I give a small laugh. My charm really disgusts me. Am I even charming? Who cares? There's not a camera in sight.

We stay silent, trying to absorb the scene. Us. Together. It's all I've ever wanted for a very long time, but it doesn't feel right to me for some reason...

My thoughts are interrupted when our escort, Ademia Perez, comes in to find his arms locked around me and the both of us staring out the window.

My cheeks flush with embarrassment, and I regretfully pull away from his embrace. Then I ask her why she needs us.

"Well, dinner is ready and I thought that you two would be hungry. Especially considering the rough day you've had..." She says, trailing off at the end.

"How very thoughtful of you Ademia! Just give me a minute to make myself look presentable." And I'm down the corridor before she can answer. Presentations aren't what I'm caring about right now. Right now, I care about not letting anyone see my tear stained clothes.

I reach my room and throw on a simple aquamarine dress, fasten a black belt around my waist, and adjust a headband in my hair. All of these luxuries aren't exactly foreign to me, yet I'm not exactly familiar with them either. I look over myself in a mirror, put on a pair of black flat soled shoes, and then head out to dinner.

Everyone falls silent at my appearance. They're been talking about me. I'm the only one that was absent, so they must have been talking about me... Wait, why should I care? I've never cared when Breeze Climpf and her friends talk about me.

Finally, Furlow breaks the silence. "You look stunning, Lily. You remind me of home."

I grin and reply, "I do like to stun, Furlow."

I take my seat at the table and we begin a new conversation. It's mostly small talk; the only one not participating is Mary. I glance at her; she hasn't even touched anything on her plate.

Soon, instinct kicks in and I begin to I coax some food into her system. They are mostly things that are packed with nutrients, though. Furlow is constantly watching me. Why? It's not like I would, or could for that matter, poison her.

The subject of the conversation has changed to the weather, and we are being served an oversized bass on greens, when I finally crack.

"Alright, we all know that we are avoiding it. So now I'll make things easier by bringing it up. What are we going to do to survive in these Games?"

Everyone is shocked by my outbreak, and I have a flashback to earlier today with Breeze. Breeze, who had the exact same reaction…

I am pulled back to the present when Furlow says, "Well, if you guys are able to tell one side of a sword from another, I'd say you have a pretty good advantage over most of the other Districts."

I snort. "I'll have to see that for myself. Are the Reapings showing yet, Ademia?"

"Yes, I think they're starting now actually. Come on then, we don't want to miss this!"

Nobody really causes me much alarm. They all seem pretty normal, a few even strong. But I have no doubt that I could make an alliance with these select few and kill them off later…

The District 4 Reaping would look pathetic to any other tribute out there. None of them hugged _their _district partner.

Just as the program is about to end, a boy from District 12 comes on stage to take his place at tribute. Then they cut to the anthem, but my heart is in my throat…

Because I have seen that face many times before…

_**Ooooooh, who is this new boy in her life? Is he as important to her as Alexander? I don't know, you can find out in the next chapter!**_

_**I lied. I do know if he is important or not. C;**_

_**Review the story and PM me any suggestions, blahblahblah.**_

_**Bye!**_


	5. From Hopefulness to Helplessness

**Chapter 5**

Don't ask me how, and _definitely_ don't ask me why, because I'm absolutely clueless about it.

I must have made a sound of alarm, because soon Alexander has a comforting arm wrapped around my shoulder. He has a confused look on his face, and whispers into my ear, "What's wrong Lily?"

"It's probably nothing Alexander. It just sort of surprised me to see someone that could actually cause us harm from one of the poorer districts. _Especially _District 12."

He doesn't buy it. He's too smart for that. Too smart for his own good... "Alright." He answers simply, "We'll keep an eye on him."

I'm glad he doesn't pursue this. It's an extremely uncomfortable subject for me.

This boy from District 12, Rhett Zalis, is strangely familiar to me. His face is always coming to me in my dreams, as a sort of 'guardian angel' you can call him. For some reason he is always saying that he is going to help bring me home. To a place that will always accept me, a place that I belong, with my family. I have no idea what any of that could mean, but District 4 _is_ my home. It always has been, always would have been if it weren't for these wretched Games.

The real question is: where do I know him from? I've never even met him before now, so how exactly can I dream about him?

This is all so confusing. My mind is still a mess from all of today's events. I'm grateful for the warmth and steadiness that Alexander provides to me. Nothing could ever faze a guy like him. Soon, I fall asleep in his arms.

In the morning I wake up in my bed, tucked in with the utmost care. He must have carried me in last night. There also must have been dozens of attendants provided by the Capitol who offered to take me, but he must not have trusted them enough to put me in their care. He's not making things any easier for me when I have to kill him in the arena.

I get in the shower and send jets of hot and cold waters wrapping me in their embrace. I've always loved water; it gives me a clear mind.

I towel off and throw on a deep blue shirt with a few ruffles on the front as well as tight white pants and thin soled running shoes. The shirt is made of an extremely soft, and insanely expensive, silk. _Janice has a dress made of silk..._

I push Janice out of my mind, since I won't be able to face that arena while thinking about the past. She hates me now. I made sure of that at the Justice Building.

I slink into the hall, and am careful not to disturb anyone. I have taken 3 steps out of my door when Alexander emerges from his room.

I'm not in the mood to talk right now, so when he opens his mouth to talk, I lightly slap the palm of my hand to my head and walk back into my room before he can say a word. At least I really did forget something, my district token. It's a small hollowed out crystal that contains a piece of coal from District 12 drowned in the salty sea water of District 4. I slip the brown leather string it hangs from around my neck and make a break for the dining car.

I encounter him right outside the door. So close…

"Hey," I say, hoping to avoid tricky topics. Like how he carried me in last night…

"Hey," he replies stiffly. What's going on? He knows there is no need to be so stiff around me.

Then, I finally notice him. Standing right behind Alexander, seemingly melding into the shadows, is a man who holds 2 guns. One is pointed directly at Alexander's head. The other…

Directly at mine.

_**Ooooh, who's the guy with the gun? What does he want with them? What is he even doing on a tribute train in the first place?**_

_**Some answers may or may not be revealed in the next chapter, who knows?**_

_**I like aggravating people by asking questions I know the answers to…(:**_

_**You're welcome.**_

_**The next chapter will come soon, if I'm not too lazy to upload it…**_


	6. What Have I Done?

**Chapter 6**

Stay calm Lily. He wants me to panic. I will not give him the satisfaction that comes with achieving a goal. Especially a goal like his.

I yawn, as if appearing almost bored at the prospect of being held at gunpoint. "Having fun there?" I ask the deranged man.

"Just a little," he replies, giving just a hint of a wicked smile. It's the smile of a true madman.

I smile back warmly, and ask innocently, "Well, that's not very nice, now is it?"

I don't wait for a response from him and step in closely, disarm him, and give one of the guns to Alexander. The man ends up sprawled on the floor, gasping for air. This process takes about 10 seconds, moving at lightning fast speeds that end up looking gracefully put together. _You dance in everything you do, Lily Pad._ My sister's words still prove to be true about me.

"So, why exactly were you pointing guns at our heads?" I ask, still using a bored tone.

He puts a berry in his mouth and shouts, "LONG LIVE THE REBELLION!" Then he slowly dies with continued muscle spasms.

"Ademia!" I shout into the dining cart.

"What?" Comes her groggy reply.

"There's a dead body I think you might want to know about in the hallway."

That sure gets her attention. She bursts through the door of the cart immediately after I say that.

"Just thought you might want to know about that." Says Alexander.

While Ademia assaults a Capitol attendant by trapping him in a corner and interrogating him about how the dead man might have gotten onto the train, Alexander and I drop our guns and walk into the dining cart side by side.

I grab some of the starchier foods from a table as well as a glass of water then sit down next to Alexander.

"What's going on outside?" Furlow inquires.

"Well a man held us at gunpoint, Lily disarmed him, and then when we demanded information from him he ate a probably poisonous berry and died. So now there is an unidentified dead man outside." Say Alexander breathlessly.

"All in a day's work. Don't you guys get held at gunpoint daily?" We all end up laughing because of the irony of my words. Small talk and politeness never cease to amaze me.

_My life in already entrusted in the hands of my mentors, so why not tell them?_

"The man said something before he died." I say.

"As I expect most people would." Says Furlow sarcastically. "And what was it exactly that he said?" The mock interest is evident in his voice.

If looks could kill, then I'm sure I would be dead 10 times over from the look that Alexander shoots me. The look is telling me not to tell anyone, but I snap at him, "We're probably going to die anyways, so why not tell them? They already have our lives in their hands anyways." Why does he care, anyways? It's not like those few words are going to trigger them into starting another rebellion anytime soon. Especially since they know how easily I can handle myself in a bad situation like that, since they probably set that up. I'm also sure that the Capitol is closely monitoring their behavior. No time to start another rebellion.

He still shoots me one more look that makes me want to just _melt._

I pat his shoulder as a sign of reassurance, and start. "The man shouted 'LONG LIVE THE REBELLION' right before he died."

Furlow and Mary used to have quizzical and amused looks on their faces, but now they just look shocked.

_They're lying… _Some sixth sense is screaming this in my head, they are lying. But why would they need to lie about this?

We finish breakfast in absolute silence, and Ademia doesn't come back in. Finally Furlow and Mary leave, so Alexander and I are left alone.

"Why did you tell them when I told you not to?" Alexander demands roughly. "And how did you know District 12?"

"I… I…" Words have _never_ been my forte. Luckily the train halts to a stop now and we fill up on gas.

I run out of the dining cart and into the room where Alexander wrapped his arms around me. At least there's _one_ enjoyable place on this train.

After about half an hour I sense his presence rather than hear it.

"I can't answer those questions honestly without hurting someone." The sound of my own voice, so weak and cracking with the effort to choke down tears, startles me.

Alexander stays silent, and soon storms out of the room. Maybe I can make it up to him while on camera.

We're off again and after about 45 minutes of me standing at the window motionless, we enter the Capitol. People go by, and they all disgust me. Cheering about our deaths like we are worthless animals. _Only one may come out alive…_

These people are savages, but even though they are going to be the cause of my death, they might also keep us alive.

Too many people are in charge of my life for my liking.

Lily is feeling a bit trapped, torn, and extremely confused right now. It doesn't feel like she can ever catch up with her life that seems to be going by in the blink of an eye. You guys ever had that feeling too? /3 I know I have.

Favorite, review, and PM me any suggestions.

BRO FIST!

Byee!


	7. How to Harden Your Heart

**Chapter 7**

"We're here. Don't worry, even if you two look horrible, I will make _sure_ that one of you comes out of these Games alive." By the way Furlow says it, he still doesn't know who to get out of the arena.

Good, because I have to make sure that he picks Alexander. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I won, there would be too many nightmares afterwards. My few good memories left unspoiled would never cancel out the things that I will probably do in that arena. Never. _Hopefully, I'll be able to keep my promises. Unlike that promise broken so many years ago… _It's no wonder that I still have trust issues from that. It will always haunt me.

Besides, there is nothing left for me back home. My new family has never accepted me. I have no friends left to share my wealth. Nobody will miss me if I'm gone. Alexander has girls lining up all around District 4 for him back home. They wouldn't be happy in the least if he was dead.

Ademia walks in and says, "The media knows about the gunman. They have no idea about any of the details though, so nobody tell them anything." We all barely have enough time to nod before she herds us out of the door.

I plaster on a fake smile and entwine my fingers into Alexander's. There are at least 40 cameras waiting outside from what I can see, and even more reporters. All of them extremely aggressive, trying to get their story.

We barely get to the car alive. I'm just surprised that they all didn't just grab us and start their interrogation there. I rest my head on Alexander's shoulder until the door shuts and a wave of reality crashes down on me as Alexander pushes me away roughly.

"You betrayed me by telling Furlow about that. I asked you not to, and you did anyways."

"Alexander, I just…" He doesn't let me finish. I'm too shocked to defend myself from his next comments.

"You what? Want Furlow and Mary to help you in the arena more than me? All of a sudden can't help yourself on camera?"

My eyes get teary and instead of using the millions of excuses I have stored for these exact things, I just respond by saying "Fine." And scoot as far away from him as possible. I cry as I watch the Capitol go by in my window.

"Lily, I'm sorry…"

"No no, _I'm_ sorry."

"For what?" He declares indignantly, and a bit confused.

"Saving the life of your precious little Breeze Climpf! As a matter of fact, I saved her life _twice. _In fact, I'm sorry for saving your life too. It was obviously the biggest mistake of my life!"

Now he has been moved to anger, all signs of gentleness in his voice have disappeared. "If you really think that then…"

"Yes, I really do think that. Believe it or not I am the exact opposite of Breeze and can actually _think. _Can you shut up now? I honestly have _no_ interest in your bullshit excuses."

My words sting, and I consider apologizing, but I choose to hold my ground instead. What do I care about him looking hurt? My words were meant to cut deep and injure him, same as his did to me. I'm not forgiving him so easily. I've never been the forgiving type. People call me a bitch behind my back, some even to my face, but I don't care. I am never nice, forgiving, or trusting to anyone unless they completely earn it. Janice had earned it. Another pang of sorrow hits me, and it feels like I've just been stabbed.

They stop the car and I'm escorted to the building in which I will lose one of my last shreds of dignity.

My prep team is indescribable. When I see how freakish they look the word 'mutt' comes to mind. They're all just so strange. One is appropriately named Reptilia and has green stones implanted into her skin, giving the effect of scales. Katrina has dead gray eyes, her hair is sticking up _everywhere_ and she has a bright silver lipstick on. Finally, there is Clarence. He's heavyset, and everything about him is dyed bright pink, even his skin. He looks like a fat flamingo.

A man named Percy walks in, sees how good I look in blue, then grabs handfuls of blue fabrics on his way out of the room. _Has he even STARTED my costume for the opening ceremonies yet?_

My prep team sees the tears still in my eyes and questions

me about them.

"Tears of joy from finally seeing the Capitol in person." I explain, curling my lips into a smile.

They all see this as a rational explanation, and start to gossip. Before they can get very far though, I interrupt and voice my concerns about my costume to them, and they rush to reassure me about him.

"He never trusts anything but his own eyes to capture a person's angle."

"He knows _exactly_ what people look good in, and he can manipulate those exact features to what he's supposed to do."

"Before this he only did the most exclusive clothes for people. Custom made only, of course."

I give a nod of understanding just to let them know they could move on now, but I still want to see his work in action.

They start their gossip again, so I join in. Who knows, they might know several rich people.

After they've plucked me raw and spilled their hearts out to me, they bring me to Percy again. It's time to see what he can do.

_**Thanks for reading! Just to let you know, this is going to be a REALLY long story. :p**_

_**Thanks for the reviews and suggestions guys! I would love to tone down the romance, but this is listed under romance and I actually DID tone it down already. The first draft was oozing love… Sorry if it's too lovey! I kind of LOVE romance.(;**_

_**Favorite, review, you know the drill.**_

_**This is a long author's note… Well, bye guys!**_


	8. The Opening Ceremonies

**Chapter 8**

I am now eating lunch with Percy, and wondering when he will stop moving his eyes up and down my body.

We don't talk the entire time. My food is left mostly untouched. There are very few starches here, and I barely even choke _those_ down.

"So," I say, breaking the silence. "Would this be an appropriate time for me to ask to see my costume?"

His face breaks out into a grin and he says, "I thought you'd never ask."

He walks me into another room, this one littered with fabrics strewn _everywhere._ But in the very middle of the room, there is a costume so beautiful that I gasp at the sight of it.

"So you really _do_ know what you're doing…"

I can't stop the words from coming out of my mouth. Thankfully, he just smiles and says, "Yes, I'm afraid I am. Go ahead, try it on."

I go into a small room and change into the costume. It's amazing.

It looks like I'm the ocean of District 4, almost as if I'm wearing salt water. The dress has the hundreds of shades that the ocean has, all somehow captured in one moment forever. It's a sleeveless gown that trails long after me, and has a matching cover-up. I am followed by the ocean, and am able to wrap others in my watery embrace. I'm able to be called beautiful and deadly, because in District 4 it's well known that the ocean sometimes doesn't let go of you once you're in its arms.

"Wait, don't take that shawl. It makes you look much older than you actually are. Take this instead." Says Percy, handing me a cape that adds an even grander effect to my appearance.

I was wrong, it didn't capture just one moment forever. Every time I move, the dress shimmers and comes to life, as if the waves are lapping against one another.

"I… I don't know if I can thank you or apologize enough."

"Then don't. There's no need." He replies simply with a shrug of his shoulders. At least he's not arrogant.

We head down to the area where they keep the chariots together. It's sick how they want to march us around looking pretty before we start to get covered in dirt and blood.

"LILY!" Alexander shouts from across the room to be heard above the roar of the Capitol crowd outside.

"ALEXANDER!" I shout back and I make my way across the room to him and we meet halfway.

My face only has a few highlights here and there, with eye shadow and lipstick that match my dress, but I'm easily recognizable by anyone.

Alexander is dressed as the deepest depths of the ocean, and looks absolutely, well, _beautiful._ His face is clear of makeup as well except for the occasional highlight. The only people who could ever understand his costume are the citizens of District 4. Everyone else will just think that we are matching and look absolutely amazing.

"People are giving us dirty looks." Alexander whispers into my ear.

"Oh well," I say with a smile. "Let's go mingle with the jealous."

"Or we could just wait until they come to us. Districts 1 and 2 are coming our way."

Sure enough, they are upon us within seconds. Thank goodness that I was disciplined enough not to have turned around.

"Hey there District 4. I'm Karina and these are my friends Grey, Emerald, and Seth. A girl wearing thousands of jewels strung together into a sort of fabric says, indicating her districtmate and both of the District 2 tributes.

"Hi" I say, I don't want to piss these people off. They are the biggest threats to me in these Games. I smile and add "My name is Lily Gallina and this is Alexander O'Neil."

"Hullo" Says Alexander, immediately taking my smile as a cue to be charming. He knows enough not to piss them off, too then. Good.

"So it looks like your stylists will go pretty far. Everyone wants them." Emerald, a girl wearing a dress with the texture of stone, comments.

Grey is a bulky guy, muscular, but extremely quiet. It's quite unnerving. He's wearing a suit made out of silver, and compliments his districtmate's costume completely. Seth is a very muscular, but shorter that Grey. He has broad shoulders, but is somehow extremely handsome. He's wearing a bodysuit that has bumps of marble _everywhere._

"Looks like they'll have to kill us for them." I reply coolly.

Soon we are all laughing because of the irony in my words. Everyone will want to kill us anyways. Every other tribute in the room is staring at us, but I honestly don't care. _Let them stare. Soon enough they will be staring with unseeing eyes._

The next thing I know, Alexander and I are engulfed by our prep teams.

They squeal out praise for our costumes once more, and then load us onto our chariot.

"I feel like the prize piece of meat in the butcher's window, being paraded around like this." I say through gritted teeth.

"We all do," Alexander replies simply.

Our chariot is up far too soon, and then we are off to a start. Once we are moving it's hard to keep your balance, but I have the balance of a natural dancer. I have absolutely no trouble at all keeping steady in the chariot, but as far as the subject of Alexander, not so much. He is as steady as a rock on land, but is like gelatin in this chariot. He sways so I catch his hand and hang on tightly.

"Please, just don't let me fall out." I say. _Oh please, I could only fall out of this chariot if I jumped. And with my balance, I would land on my feet._

"Thanks," he says, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

"No problem. Do me a favor, and don't let go of my hand until I give you the signal. Just keep steady, and be prepared for anything."

"Okay…" He says, looking a bit more than a little confused.

This entire time the audience has gone berserk for us, throwing flowers and everything. Meanwhile, we've been talking, waving, smiling, and generally pleasing the audience.

"Now." I say, giving the signal.

Alexander lets go, and I launch onto his shoulders, giving the full effect of the ocean.

"Steady there, Alexander. Just stay still for about another minute." He nods, understanding that I want the audience to remember how we brought the ocean with us.

The moment I landed the crowd went absolutely _nuts._ If before was berserk, we need to add an even stronger word to the dictionary now.

"Might want to brace yourself." I warn Alexander, then I spring off of his shoulders and land in a handstand on the left horse. It doesn't even miss a step. _These things are VERY well trained…_

Then I lower myself in such a fashion that I can gather my dress train and ride side saddle.

"You never cease to amaze me" Alexander gawks behind me.

"I'm full of surprises." I reply simply. "Besides, most of that was pure instinct."

This has gotten everyone's attention, and all cameras are trained on us. I wave, catch flowers, blow kisses, and basically become the definition of charming to these people. _How very vulnerable these people are._

People are chanting my name from all directions. It' too bad that I got the attention of absolutely _everybody, _because somebody may want to cause me harm_. _Then I realize that the Capitol citizens aren't the only vulnerable ones here, because the next thing I know I'm slumped on the ground with a painful tranquilizer dart sticking out of my arm. My last thoughts are _That's it, the person who just did that is dead. _Then I black out.

_**This is a long chapter…**_

_**Can you guys spell 'CONSPIRACY THEORY'?**_

_**^^That's a hint. C;**_

_**Okay so review, add to favorites, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye!**_


	9. The Best Kind of Medicine

**Chapter 9**

I wake up a pure white room that only contains the bed I'm lying on and several machines with veins running into my arms.

"Alexander…" I murmur softly.

When nobody answers, I become frantic.

"ALEXANDER!" I shout, and scramble out of bed.

A door opens, but it does not reveal Alexander. It reveals a Capitol doctor.

"The dart that punctured your arm was a very painful tranquilizer, but it only puts you to sleep and leaves a hole in your arm that bled like no tomorrow when the dart was removed." He explains, speaking rapidly. "You lost a few pints of blood, which is mostly why you're still in here. You've been out of it for a day. That Alexander boy insisted he come with you, but now he's on your floor. By the way, you're in an underground hospital located beneath the tribute tower. Also, when you fell you sustained a minor concussion that will last for a few more days with the drugs that we've given you."

This is the first time that I've noticed how deathly pale I am. "What happened?" I manage to croak out.

He just sighs and calmly strides out of the room. My voice rises as I repeat the question over and over again. Soon, the door opens again and I run into the arms of the person awaiting me on the other side.

"What happened? Are you hurt? Did anyone else get hurt? What happened? Are you hurt?" I blabber out, bombarding Alexander with questions.

He just laughs and says "I'll answer your questions on our floor. _In private._" I guess now is not the time to be discussing this.

I don't question this, but I do check him over and change from the sterile white hospital gown into a sky blue sweatshirt and black sweatpants.

When we get to our floor Alexander dumps me on the living room couch and I understand _just_ how hurt he felt when he thought our relationship was only on camera and in public. That explains why he was so nice to me at the chariots. He's serving his revenge up cold. Everything that happens in here is confidential, so no one will ever know. He can give me the cold shoulder as often as he wants here. Tears are springing into my eyes when my rebel mentors walk in. They pretend not to notice as I wipe my tears away.

"What happened?" I ask. So far, nobody has ever answered my simple question.

"Well, at the opening ceremonies the person who shot you with the dart wasn't aiming for you in particular. He probably just wanted to cause alarm to the crowd by shooting down the person who controlled the most attention. And that just happened to be you." Says Furlow.

"Well, what became of them?"

"Like the man on the train this man shouted 'LONG LIVE THE REBELLION!' right before he swallowed a berry and died." This time it's Mary who explains things to me.

"Okay, well what happened after I fell unconscious?"

"Alexander shouted for all of the horses to stop and carried you to a team of medical attendants who then brought you to that underground hospital." Furlow says in an overly patient voice.

"Nobody else got hurt?"

"Not at all."

"Good."

After a few more polite exchanges, I walk to Alexander's door and knock. He answers, sees me, and then leans against the door frame.

"What do want?" He demands roughly.

I stay silent, and when he is about to slam the door in my face but I slink in and close it softly behind me. I wrap my arms around his shoulders, and after a second's hesitation his go around my waist.

"You," I answer, and lean in slowly. I enjoy, there are no doubts about that, but something doesn't feel completely right. It was sort of a guilty pleasure for me, but it soon begins to bother me so much that I completely suppress the uneasy feeling in my gut and just enjoy the moment. I'm pondering why I could ever think that this didn't feel right, and felt so right at the same time, when there's a knock on the door.

Every time.

_Well,_ I think with a smirk, _at least he kissed back._

Alexander opens the door to reveal Ademia, who takes one look at the situation, apologizes, and then states her business.

"Well tomorrow you have training at ten, and I felt like I needed to warn you about this big busy schedule that you have!" Then she disappears down the hallway.

"I should probably go…" I say and give Alexander a peck on the cheek. Then I'm down the hall before he can even protest.

EEEEEK! I know, finally a love scene.(((:

Took me long enough…

Review, favorite, and PM me any suggestions.

Thanks guys! Love you all!

Bye!


	10. Two Districts As One

**Chapter 10**

The next morning I end up rising with the sun after having a restless night. Thank goodness Percy had slipped me a cosmetics case when no one was looking and showed me how to use it. Otherwise, I would be going to training with dark circles under my eyes.

After I shower and clean my teeth, I put my hair into a side ponytail. My friends back home had always commented jealously about my hair. It's straight and always a glossy curtain of blonde from my mother mingled with the brown of my father. At least it's not exactly like my mother's or sister's hair, since they both had the same blonde hair. If it was the same I would go insane knowing that I had the same hair as 2 dead women.

The dark circles disappear with some makeup, and then I dress in a cerulean jacket and some flexible black pants. Then I'm out the door and into the dining room.

I'm surprised not to see anyone else at the table yet, but after I wait for about 15 minutes mostly everybody joins me. At least I won't be having any panic attacks this early today.

Alexander isn't mad at me anymore, so he sits next to me and silently intertwines his fingers into mine. He gives me a reassuring squeeze, to calm any nerves I might have about today in training. _Ha, I could probably take on_ _all of the tributes from 1 and 2 at once and come out alive, _I think cockily. I shouldn't be that cocky, I haven't even seen them fight yet.

"So, what's our training strategy going to be?" I ask our mentors.

"Well, you guys are going to want to train separately, but it's your call on together or apart." He's talking about the interviews then, I guess. I was going more for today, but oh well.

I give Alexander's hand a squeeze and we simultaneously say, "Together," and, "Apart."

I shoot him a dirty look, "Together." I say firmly.

"Apart," he disagrees, just as firmly. "You and I will want to be apart for this training."

"Why?" I demand.

"Because then you won't have to reveal your special skills to each other before the time comes." Interjects Furlow, and I realize that they're right.

"Fine. Show it only to the Gamemakers, I got it. What do we do in group training then?" Now I'm trying to cover up my mistake, and it's just as weak as a bald man combing what little hair he has left over a bald spot.

"Well, act mediocre at best." Says Mary, "Don't show them what you're good at. Strive to close the gap between your strengths and weaknesses in there, just to make sure that you're not just standing around looking pretty."

I stay silent while I absorb the information. "Well, anything else?"

"Don't let them know about your starch and water diet." She replies.

My jaw drops. "How did you figure that out?"

"It's not that hard, sweetie. All you've been eating this entire time is starches and then drinking water afterwards to expand them. You control your portions extremely. That way you don't need as much food and your stomach won't expand like everyone else's probably will before the Games. You're still gaining the weight that you will need in that arena, which is amazing. You're actually smarter than you look."

My jaw drops down even further at this _extremely_ accurate assessment. Those were my exact intentions to gain weight, because surely I will need it later on.

"You have about 1 hour and 30 minutes until 9:45, which is when I want you to arrive at training. I will NOT tolerate tardiness, so get ready!"

"Ademia, there's 2 hours…" Alexander tries to counter.

"An hour and 45 minutes…" I say.

Soon we are all arguing about how much time there is left until we finally decide to actually check a clock. By now Ademia is right since we spent about 15 minutes arguing.

"Second place, sucker." I brag to Alexander.

"More attractive than you, sucker."

"Want to bet?"

"I would bet my life on it."

"Say hello to my friend's dead fish, Nils, while you're dead."

With that I walk away and head halfway down the hallway that leads to our rooms. When I'm sure that no one can see me I slip into a small alcove and hide behind an overly grown plant. There I lie in wait for Alexander to come by so I can ambush him when I hear his footsteps.

Then, I hear it. The beautifully resounding noise my district token makes when the coal hits the crystal, the way it vibrates in the salt water.

Although I try to fight it off of me, my memories overpower me like an attacker and soon I'm 6 years old again. No, no, no, no… My memories are coming back to haunt me again.

My grandmother was still alive during the rebellion, but only watched over the children because of her old age and arthritis. All of the other grandmothers had died off, but she did have help. There were a few rebel soldiers there to protect us, but for the most part she is one of the only people there that cared for us.

We were in a hidden bomb shelter in District 4 waiting out the war, and that was around the time that she taught me how to dance. I was graceful, flexible, and elegant. I still am, but it was more special back then. Those were the times that I learned how. It was our special thing.

During one of the rare occasions that we got to go aboveground, we found a piece of coal in the ocean near our house. I talked to her about why I thought a piece of District 12 would be in District 4, especially since the coal supplies had been cut off for a very long time. Since I was so interested in it, my grandmother put the piece of coal in a jar and scooped up some saltwater to have in there too. It had made such an unearthly but beautiful sound that I loved so much that I had even choreographed a dance to it.

When she saw how happy that little sound made me, she somehow got a small piece of the coal and some saltwater into a beautifully shaped crystal that was hollowed out, and hung it on brown leather string. I was so proud of it and showed it to everyone, and even danced to the tinkling. I wonder if Alexander ever noticed…

Soon, I'm pulled back to the present when I hear his heavy footsteps. I jump out just as Alexander steps into view of the alcove. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and give him a peck on the cheek.

"The one who always comes up with amazing ideas, sucker."

He pulls me closer into his embrace and says, "I would only be a sucker if I missed out on having you." A pang of uneasiness, like this isn't how it's supposed to be, gets me right in the gut. I suppress it once more.

I hear another pair of footsteps so I say, "I should probably go now… I don't tolerate tardiness!" I say, imitating Ademia's ridiculous accent.

I don't really have anything to do in my room, so I just order a piece of coal, a glass full of saltwater, and a string that I can rig to hang it from so it can keep making noise without me constantly provoking it. I hang the glass up and drop the coal into the glass and give it a push so it will keep going for a little while.

Then I dance to my old favorite sound, the one that brought back such old memories with it, memories that caused me such pain and sorrow. Finally, I realize that this is still my favorite sound. Not because it is so beautiful, but because it reminds me of my grandmother.

Who wants to hear more about her grandmother? I know I do. Hehe, I'm editing my first draft as I go along so if you guys want I could add more of her memories in. Just to let you know, I only have about 2 or 3 more after this. I'm not really sure…

Okay so review, favorite, and PM me any suggestions!

Bye!


	11. Time Passes, The Pain Doesn't

**Chapter 11**

When there's a knock on my door, I stop my dancing and walk over to answer it. It's Alexander.

"Ademia says we have to go now, since she doesn't want us to be late." He explains apologetically.

"Okay," I answer. I'm in top physical condition, so the last 40 minutes of dancing didn't make me break much of a sweat. My feet _are _sore though. I'll have to remember to order some Capitol dance shoes later.

Ademia is waiting at the elevator, and soon we are on our way to the basement where we will train for these Games.

We arrive early, and there are only the other career tributes waiting here. Well, them and the two tributes from District 12…

I make a split second decision and head over to the District 12 cluster.

"Hey," I say.

"Hey," replies Rhett, more than just a little surprised at our appearance.

The other career tributes are staring daggers at us, but I honestly couldn't care less.

"I saw you fall last night. Smooth," says the District 12 girl.

"Yea, they only tranquilize the important people that others actually _give a crap _about." Replies Alexander sharply.

"Who are you, anyways?" I demand of her.

"Lavender Slinth," she supplies smugly, as if I'm supposed to recognize the name and bow down to her or something.

I look her over again and again, and then she finally snaps and says, "What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm trying to remember every detail of you. You're going to be my first kill," Then I walk away calmly with Alexander. When I look back I give her a confident smirk, her face turns to a ghostly white. I then turn my attentions to the career conversation.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Lily?" Demands Grey.

"Intimidating the competition," I say, and then add. "You're welcome."

Other tributes file into the training center while I dance circles around Grey with words. He really leaves himself open for so many comebacks, it's sad.

After a while a man named Jason comes up and explains the rules of training to us, and soon after releases us.

Alexander and I follow the rest of the careers for the most part of training, which is pretty normal since they seem to move in a pack.

After an hour of Seth showing off at wrestling, I get bored and trip him when he's going at it with the instructor. I soon find that that's a bad move…

"HOW. DID. YOU. DO. THAT?" says Seth, the indignation evident in his voice.

"I have absolutely no, idea…" I do, actually. He's extremely clumsy and relies on brute strength, which was his downfall.

To avoid any other conflict, I wander over to the plants station.

I don't recognize very many of these plants, and their habitats won't help very much. Some survive in extremely desolate areas, others in swamps and wetlands. It makes no sense.

"Hey, Lily. Sorry that Lavender is kind of, well…" Says Rhett from behind me. I jump, but I could hear him and easily knew where he was headed. He's oh so very loud.

"You startled me, Rhett. And don't worry; it's not your fault. So there's no need for you to apologize."

"That was the idea." He says, grinning. "And I just kind of felt obligated to."

"I was just about to head over to knots. You coming?"

"Sure, everything else is occupied," he says sarcastically. There are several more interesting stations that are vacated.

I push him playfully then we head over to the instructor. I wiz through the class but Rhett has a few, well, _difficulties_. When he gets stuck I place my hands on his and guiding him through the motions.

"Not so sarcastic now, huh?" I ask.

"Not one bit, ma'am," he replies with a mock salute. I laugh.

"If you were as smart with your mind as you are with your mouth, then you just might make it…"

"Yea, maybe I would. That is, if all of the tributes from 1, 2, and 4 killed each other. No offense."

"Well, 4 isn't that stupid, plus 1 and 2 will kill each other _later _on." I reply, "1, 2, and 4 may have been the better trained districts, but some people aren't snobby about it."

"Well, you guys _were_ the better trained offensive districts during the rebellion. Going in and attacking, leading the raids. You were trained to fight extremely well. The other districts were taught the basics on how to defend." And then he adds in a rather matter of fact tone, "You have to take _some_ credit for it."

"Why," I snap. "Would I want to take credit for the reason my older brother is dead?" My voice rises at the end even though I didn't intend it to do so.

"I didn't know that…" he starts.

"Of course you didn't. I bet you didn't know that my dad and I are the only survivors of my original family, or that he ignores me and remarried. I had an older brother and sister, only to be replaced by 2 younger siblings who live to ruin my life. In fact, both of my older siblings were trained for the rebellion and killed soon after. My mother was killed for simply being associated with them. My grandmother slaughtered before my eyes just because she took care of harmless children. I only survived because I escaped and stayed hidden with the other children."

"You mean you kept the other kids alive in a hidden area by quieting them, feeding them, and tending to their wounds." I didn't even notice Alexander walk by. He wraps his arms around me and whispers soothing words into my ear to calm me down. Eventually I do, and see how guilty Rhett looks and realize that I was shouting at him.

"I'm sorry Rhett. It wasn't right of me to blame you. Blame anyone except for the killers themselves…"

"No, I need to learn when to stop," he says.

"No, it was my fault. There was no way for you to have known about any of that." I say, then walk over to camouflage with Alexander.

I'm able to pain him into a flowery meadow, but he takes a while to paint me into a snowy pass.

'You're shaking…" I say. Then I try to steady him by taking his hand and running it against my face.

"I'm remembering," he says. His voice seems far away, and soon I am remembering too.

Everybody that I loved except my 'father' was dead. I watched one of the most important people in my life die. Now I had to take care of roughly around 70 children.

"What do I do?" I had said helplessly, my chin rested on my knees. I don't know how, but I knew this is where we were supposed to go. It was a hidden clearing in the middle of the forests in District 4. Nobody would find us. The only way to find this place is if you looked for it. I knew my grandmother didn't want me to look weak by crying for her in front of everyone. It didn't matter. The tears wouldn't come.

All I remember is one of the boys saying to me, "I'll help you take care of them."

After that we wove very large bowls to put freshwater in, as well as ones to put food in. We gathered food from the ocean, found a freshwater stream, and many herbs in the forest that we could mash up to help the wounded. We fished, ate, drank, and basically kept everyone alive.

After a week of this we had a fairly large collection of supplies, so we snuck into the District and got a radio from one of the houses. That's how we got our news.

One night the full force of losing everything that mattered hit me at once. I had built a dam to keep it away, but I had heard that beautiful tinkling, and with that small noise it all broke free and crushed me. I cried huge body racking sobs when I was alone, and cried myself to sleep for a week. Yes, they were silent but hurt all the same. Then finally the boy who had offered to help get food found me and cradled me like I was a small child. He did this every night without a word, and soon I stopped my tears. When tears turned to nightmares, he still stayed and comforted me, stopping my screams and holding me down when I thrashed around. It sounds horrible, but if he did anything else the other children would have heard and panicked. This boy helped me survive back then.

I come back to the present and realize that Alexander was that boy.

_**Awwww, that's sweet.3**_

_**Who knew that Lily and Alexander could take care of 70 children? I didn't. Well, at least until I wrote it…**_

_**Well, it looks like that makes both of them top competitors in these Games. WHO WILL WIN?**_

_**Alright, I may or may not update for a while. It depends on how cruel teachers can be during the last week of school. You guys know what I'm talking about.(;**_

_**Review, favorite, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye!**_


	12. Trained to Kill

**Chapter 12**

After we clean ourselves up at camouflage, it's time for lunch. Alexander and I sit down next to each other after get our food. It's not very soon after that the other careers show up.

"Still sticking with that special diet?" Alexander whispers, his soft lips tickling my ear. Without realizing it, I grabbed only starches and a glass of water.

"I guess so," I say, grabbing a grape off of his plate and putting it next to his mouth, pulling it away when he makes a move for it. After a few seconds I pop it into my own mouth.

"You might want to end the romance crap before we get into the arena. That is, unless you want to give them the ultimate showdown." Karina snarls.

I raise an eyebrow as if saying '_Are you kidding me?' _Then I squeeze Alexander's hand. He should talk now.

"It's not crap if it's real, unlike that face of yours." Alexander replies coolly.

"Hey man, just trying to help," says Seth, immediately coming to her aid. Interesting…

"Well, we are the only ones who can really handle a weapon in these Games," I say. I just wanted to change the subject, but it is mostly true. The most anyone else here can do it raise the weapon, if that.

"Yea, but I saw both District 7's with the axes. If they get their hands on some in the arena then we will probably start to look a lot like trees to them." Says Emerald.

"Not if we get to the Cornucopia first," I say mischievously.

Just then lunch is over and I practice with the axes. If I'm going to take them, then I might as well be able to use them.

Ever since the knot tying disaster with Rhett, Alexander has stayed by my side, but I'm still able to talk to a lot of the other tributes. Some of them trust me. More of them don't.

Seth is always with Karina, which confirms my theory. If I were to kill here, that would make him recklessly come after me, and also make him an easy kill.

Other than that, the others don't care much for anyone but themselves, so I will have to get my hands on some knives. They are my weapon. They're perfect for me, because I can dance circles around my opponents and hit them in 25 different spots along the way. If I want it done quickly I could disarm them, pin them down, and get one quick and clean cut. They go perfect with my 'battle dance'.

Give me a bit of time and I can get the hang of almost any weapon, mostly because I was taught to memorize so many things from such a young age. Especially rhythms. To me, each weapon has a rhythm and I dance with it until I get it. Yet another thing I learned from my beloved grandmother…

I somehow ended up at weight lifting. Mediocre at best, got it. I lift up 25 pounds but make it look like I'm struggling. That earns some snickering from Emerald, Seth, and Karina.

After a while of this we head back up to our rooms. Thank goodness, privacy.

Dinner flashes by, but I barely make a dent in anything. These foods would cost a fortune back home. Wait, we wouldn't even _have _half of the stuff here back home. Besides, I won't miss home. Just like how nobody will miss me.

The next few days are pretty bland. I try to suck at everything, just to make it look like a fluke yesterday. I train with weapons that are more foreign to my hands, just to make sure I can actually use them. By the final day of training, I'm able to handle every weapon in the room.

The morning of the day we show the Gamemakers what we can do, I knock on Alexander's door. He answers right away. I'm wearing a tight sky blue leotard a baggy dark blue jumpsuit. Nobody will ever find out from me what I showed the Gamemakers.

"Mind if I come in?"

"Make yourself comfortable."

His room is spotless, but I'm not surprised since there are attendants that see to that.

"Training scores today," I say nervously.

"Well we give them the reasons for why we deserve that training score. Tonight they give out the actual score," he corrects with a nervous laugh.

"You know what I meant."

"Actually, I don't. Care to explain?"

So do explain, just without words. Silently, I lean in and we kiss. "Did that explain it?" I ask, quietly.

"You know, I didn't quite get it. Mind explaining it again?" This time he leans in.

I give out a girlish giggle that is completely out of character, then say "Ademia, Furlow, and Mary are going to put us through hell tomorrow, so why not celebrate today?"

"What did you have in mind?" He asks in a lowered voice.

"Maybe a picnic in the living room. With everybody in front of the television while waiting for our training scores."

"Everybody?" He says, raising an eyebrow at me.

I push him playfully and answer, "Yes, everybody."

After breakfast, we head down to the training center. They begin calling us one by one, and once people go in, they don't come back. Alexander is up far too soon.

"Show them what you've got, District 4." I say to him before he leaves.

"Same goes for you, District 4," he replies without missing a beat.

I give him a light peck on the cheek for luck, and then he leaves me with the rest of the tributes. I mingle with them until they call me up, 25 minutes later.

"Hullo," I say, taking on a bubbly personality while taking off the outer jumpsuit. "My name is Lily Gallina, and I'm from District 4."

I make a move toward the tridents, and then in the blink of an eye I'm at knives instead. I equip myself with several of the razor sharped edges, and then start my dance. I move gracefully and rip the dummy to shreds within seconds. When this happens I turn around and throw, getting a knife stuck in the bull's eye of the shooting range. It wouldn't be such a big deal if it wasn't clear on the other side of the room.

I go from station to station and master everything there, becoming one with each weapon's rhythm.

The Gamemakers get bored eventually, and start to talk about the latest fashions. My dance turns to anger, I'm using knives again. When I'm just regular mad, then I'm deadly. I must be a razor sharp killing machine by now.

Then a Gamemaker has the nerve to shout down to me, "HEY, MILLY! YOU AREN'T PROVING SHIT BY JUST CUTTING UP A DUMMY!"

"SEND ME A SPARRING PARTNER THEN!" I shout back. Then I tear apart just about my 30th dummy. I tear anymore and nobody else will have any.

There's some discussion, then they send down an extremely muscular man.

"THIS IS A CAP-I-TOL PRI-SON-ER. HE WILL SPAR WITH YOU NOW." Shouts one of the female Gamemakers. She must think I'm stupid or something, with all of that sounding out going on.

"O-KAY. I FIGHT NOW. YOU ALL WATCH ME. I WILL FIGHT MAN NOW."

A man that doesn't feel like getting me pissed right now shouts down, "THIS IS A CAPITOL PRISONER OF WAR. YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU LIKE, WE DON'T CARE. HIS LIFE IS OF NO VALUE TO US."

A life, with no value? No such thing exists. I'm mad as hell right now, so I just tightly nod as the prisoner equips himself with a heavy broad sword. He smiles wickedly, and then he gets into a ready position.

I lunge, but it's a fake out. He backs away faster than I thought he could. He's lighter on his feet than I thought, then. This time, I move faster than my last lunge and disarm him. I knock his feet out from under him and place my foot onto his chest.

"HURRY UP WITH IT, WILL YOU?" It must be those Gamemakers' jobs to piss me off.

I lean in close to the man and whisper into his ear, "I'm sorry…"

"No need to be," he whispers back. "You'll be ending my suffering, since they feed me only twice a week and torture me every day that I'm not fed."

"I'll make it as quick and painless as I can," I say, the regret and pain evident in my voice. He gives an almost imperceptible nod, and I quickly slit his throat.

I drop my weapons and start to walk towards the elevator.

"MS. GALLINA I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN DISMISSED."

I whirl around, march back to pick up my jumpsuit, and shout back, "I CAN HONESTLY SAY THESE 3 WORDS: I. DON'T. CARE."

Then I'm on the elevator and headed up to my floor so fast that they can't even protest again. On the way I put my jumpsuit back on.

I get to the 4th floor and burst into Alexander's room. He's not there.

"ALEXANDER!"

"Boo!" He says from behind. "What's the hurry, Lily?"

"Picnic ready yet? I've got a bit of news."

"Yea, what's the news?"

"You'll find out soon enough."

He keeps pestering me, trying to get the news out of me but I don't even waver. He will never want me once he knows what happened.

After a few hours, we all gather in the living room and we start dinner. We eat in silence for a while until I say, "Well, what happened during _your_ Gamemaker's session today, Alexander?"

"Well, I showed them what's what with a trident and wrestled with a Capitol attendant, you?"

"I showed them how to dance with a weapon and then killed a man." Trying to keep an even tone, but failing when my voice cracks at the end.

Everyone was listening to our conversation lazily, but now their heads snap up and gape at me.

"So," I say to anyone in general. "How was your day?"

When the silence stretches on, I just sigh and say, "Well he was a Capitol prisoner. They said I could do whatever I liked to him, since his life wasn't 'important' to them. I then took mercy on him and killed him, therefore getting him away from further torture."

To break the eerie silence, Percy answers my earlier question. He had decided to join us tonight since it was so important. "Well, my day was hectic. So many women demanded your costume from the Opening Ceremonies yet again. I had to turn so many of them down though, because they would have looked _horrible _with blue."

I politely laugh, and then notice how everyone else is staring at me. "There's nothing else to it, okay?"

"Oh Lily…" Says Alexander, my hand losing circulation in his white knuckled grip.

"Well, let's watch the scores now. I'm curious as to see _just _how horribly you did." Says Furlow.

I grin and say, "Always the positive one, I see."

Then we turn on the TV and watch a man named Waldemar Frobisher make announcements about the tributes, predictions, things I don't care about. Then it's the moment of truth.

Grey pulls an 11, Karina a 9, Seth a 10, Emerald a 9, and both District 3 tributes pulling up 4's.

Alexander then receives a 10, and we all hold our breaths in anticipation of my score. We all simultaneously gasp because for some reason I have pulled a 12.


	13. Battle Rage

**Chapter 13**

"How..?" I start to ask, but then I see how mad Alexander is. It can't have anything to do with me scoring higher than him, can it?

My eyes ask a silent question, _What's wrong?_

He just fumes there silently. I see how it is. The silent treatment.

Then he surprises me by letting out a laugh. "Looks like you've eliminated all hope of any other tribute going home." A few make a trail down his cheeks.

I wipe them away silently. He's scared that he isn't going to go home. _I wasn't really planning on living._

Percy's voice reminds me that we aren't alone. "Well, you'll be just fine. The both of you. Hopefully, it won't come down to the two of you breaking any alliance between each other. You are going to be in an alliance together, I presume?"

"Yes, of course," I answer hastily. It looks like I too have been crying, even if I didn't notice until now. But Percy's words make me smile, and my smile shines through the gloom.

"You look a lot better when you smile," Mary comments, probably trying to change the subject.

"Thank you," I say, going along with it.

"Thank me when you come out alive," Looks like she and Furlow have chosen me over Alexander. _Shit…_

I want to shout out to everyone about how Alexander is going to come out, then realize that the murderous beast that was supposed to come out of me in the arena came a bit too early.

I gather up my thoughts in time to catch Rhett's 9. "How did he pull that..?" I voice aloud.

"Probably picked up whatever weapon that you used to kill that man. The Gamemakers then probably freaked out and dismissed him." Alexander jokes.

We all laugh, and soon I almost forget the unfortunate turn of events.

I pull Alexander away when the little party ends and get him to his room. I pull him down to my level, his ear to my lips, and I whisper, "I love you."

"I love you too, Lily."

We kiss, much longer than before, and with such a passion that I come up breathless. Finally, a moment uninterrupted.

"Promise me that you won't be blinded by battle rage," My voice comes out as barely a whisper, yet it still startles me.

"I promise. Promise me that you will always stay by my side."

"I promise."

We are locked in each other's arms, and I think to myself, _I made him give an empty promise. _Well, that is unless he plans on actually keeping it, unlike the person who had broken the same promise so many years ago…

"Please, excuse me," I say before the memories have a chance to crush me.

I get to my room and suddenly I'm 6 again, and my older brother is going off to do his part in the rebellion. I still remember his exact words after all these years.

"I'm sorry that I won't be home for your birthday this year, Lily Pad." He had said; I had been happily perched upon his shoulders.

"It's okay Brandon," I had said. I was so young. "I don't need a present as long as you come back home. That can be my present."

"It's a deal then," he had said, his voice catching with emotion and his eyes filled with tears.

"Don't cry. Please Brandon?"

"Me? Cry? I can't believe that you think a tough guy like me would cry, Lily Pad."

"You are a tough guy. And if you cried then that would mean that tough guys cried."

He laughed, and then began to cry. I wiped away his tears and said firmly to him, "No crying Brandon. I want to remember you the way you think a tough guy should look."

"No matter what, I hope that I look like a tough guy in your eyes."

"You already do every day when you help daddy on the boat. I wanna be just like you. Brave and smart and strong and tough."

"You are already the bravest and smartest and strongest and toughest little girl that I know!"

I had giggled and we went forward down the path back to the house.

"Promise me that you won't be blinded by battle rage."

"I thought you said that I was tough and smart?" He had replied jokingly. I was dead serious.

"Promise me!" I had said, my voice rose with panic as we neared the house, because once we reached there he would have to leave.

"I promise," he said finally.

"Good," I had said with a satisfied smile, going back to my happy self.

Battle rage was when a man had so much adrenaline pumping through his veins that he was driven insane and went on a killing spree. They can't see common sense, and even the smartest men get it.

Then I begin to remember a man who had escaped from the Capitol soldiers that we found, the other children and I. He had been on the verge of death, but he was also a part of the force my brother had been on. When I asked about him he had this to say:

"That boy was blinded with battle rage. They caught our unit and would have let us go warn other troops but that brother of yours wouldn't stop fighting. I barely got away as it is," and with that the man took one last shuttering breath and died.

We had buried him, and when I was finally alone I cried and cried some more, not just because I had log my only brother, but because he had also broken his promise to me. That's why I had so many trust issues with people now, even my own father. Wait, scratch that. _Especially _my own father.

I won't let this happen again with Alexander. History will _not _repeat itself. Not if I have anything to do with it.

_**Alright, I have the next few chapters typed up and ready to upload, but I think I should start pacing myself for uploading.**_

_**Okay, so did you guys like Lily's brother, Brandon? I wish my brother was like that. /:**_

_**What's up with Alexander and Lily? Who is really important to Lily at this point?**_

_**Review, favorite, put on your alerts, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Btw, I am in DESPERATE need of names for both tributes from the following districts: 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11. They will be used later on in the story in the arena.(;**_

_**Bye!**_


	14. Preparations and Strategies

**Chapter 14**

The next morning I see Ademia's ugly side.

"Stand straighter! Stop squinting! Don't purse your lips! Come on, look alive! Lily this might be hard for your small brain to process but you might want to try to get it right this time!"

I was actually doing pretty well. All of this happened within the first hour, when we were both playing nice. Then my claws came out when she went too far.

"Wow, if you're this bad then your grandmother must have been even worse than this!"

"You know what Ademia? You should leave. Before _my _ugly side comes out." I had snarled.

"Honey, you only _have _an ugly side." She had countered.

"Well guess what Ademia? I'm fed up with your crap. I'll figure this out on my own. I don't need your help."

Now here I stand, my smile graceful and not too much. Everything about me screamed elegant. The way I walked, my posture, absolutely everything.

"There you go," says Ademia quietly from the doorway.

I whip around and crack down on her. "What do you want now?"

"I knew you wouldn't need my help. You just needed some constructive criticism to get you going."

"You mean to tell me that all of that was just a ploy?"

"Yes, honey. I would never hurt you like that. Ever."

"I would cry Ademia, but you taught me not to," I say. "Well, that and the fact that the makeup Percy gave me would run."

"That's my girl. Come on, I'll teach you which smile goes with which phrases now."

It turns out that I'm a natural at this.

"People will love you!" We have half an hour left. I need her to hate me. But I can't stand it when people hate me. I also need everyone to choose Alexander to win and be a sponsor for. Ademia isn't a sponsor.

I'm having this fight of wills in my head, and Ademia is sitting there patiently awaiting a response. Right, then she will like me. It won't hurt to have just one person left…

"Only because certain talented people have gotten me this far."

"Let's try some questions they might use in your interview."

"I thought this was manners. I also thought that Furlow and Mary were asking the questions."

"Yea, but Furlow doesn't know Olus as well as I do. I know what he will ask. Furlow has a paper of questions provided by the Capitol."

She's right. I sigh and say, "Okay, ask away."

She smiles, "Alright. Why did you volunteer?"

I hesitate and she says, "No hesitations. Just the truth."

I sigh, "I knew that nobody deserved to be killed by someone who could be a possible friend."

"What do you mean by 'possible friend'?"

"I mean under different circumstances we could have all been friends. We could have all liked each other."

"Were you and Breeze Climpf friends?"

"No. I just didn't think that she deserved it. Not even her."

"'Not even her'? I sense a rivalry."

"That's probably because there is one. We both fell for the same boy. But I had always thought and pretty much known that he preferred her. I never seemed to exist in his world."

"Oooooh. Who is this lucky lad?"

I cough nervously and wriggle in my chair uncomfortably. "I'm a bit parched. Could I get some mineral water?"

"Of course dear," says Ademia, ending our Mach interview. "Just remember, if you get that far in the real interview, don't stop."

"I know," I whisper. Then finally our time is up and I head over to lunch and gratefully meet up with Alexander.

"Hey, how was Ademia?"

"Unexpected. How was Furlow?"

"Eh, so-so."

We sit down to eat and I pick at the starches on my plate. I haven't really been hungry for a very long time.

"So, Mary was right about you only eating starches?"

He's been using to same conversation starter for the past few days. It's kind of cute to me. "Yea," I answer.

"Does it work?"

"I wouldn't be using it anymore if it didn't."

He nods to acknowledge this and we fall silent. I hate silences, so I feel compelled to break it.

"What do you think is going to be in that arena, just waiting for us?" I have just asked the most dreaded question on everyone's minds.

"I don't know. This is the first year of these sick Games. It could be anything."

We are silent again for a while, then when we are finished attendants cart us off to the rooms where we will be instructed for another 4 hours.

"Sexy? Charming? Humble? Take your pick." Says Mary.

"What?"

"You want to have an angle for the crowd. You're pleasing them. Show an angle for yourself in 3 minutes."

"3 minutes?" I'm baffled by this small time frame.

"Yes, and right now I'm considering slow and stupid seeing as you can't keep up." Says Furlow, his voice thick with exasperation.

"All 3. Each angle will shine in a minute time frame."

"That's dangerous."

"Should we add that to the list too, then?" I mock.

"If you do all 3, you will seem dangerous as _well _as mysterious. Bravo Ms. Gallina, you have your angles. Now we should practice." Says Mary, completely ignoring my comment and cutting off anything Furlow has to say about it.

"Yes, yes, practice." Adds in Furlow, clearly annoyed.

"Smooth move, Furlow."

"Unpleasant isn't what people want," he replies clicking his tongue at me.

"Let's begin," I say with a smile.

"What does it feel like to be one of the first tributes to ever be I the Hunger Games?"

"Wonderful. It's an amazing experience and it's good to know that I won't ever be forgotten. Especially looking this good in these clothes." Sexy in minute 1. I will definitely look the part with Percy's help.

"What do you think about all of this happening so fast and so soon?"

"I'm surprised by how people do it. I mean, have you seen the other tributes? They are adjusting so well, and they have looked amazing while doing it." Minute 2, charming.

"What has been your favorite thing since you have gotten here?"

"Wow, that's a thinker. A simple girl like me from District 4 learns to not expect much, so I'd probably have to say the luxuries. I love all of the beautiful things that people here in the Capitol have." I add in a wistful sigh at the end, for good measure. Minute 3, humble. I've tested all 3 angles and nailed them.

Mary and Furlow exchange a glance and a terse nod, and then turn to me.

"You're ready," says Mary simply.

_**Summer tends to be boring when your friends can't hang out… :/**_

_**So that's basically why I updated, so people don't get too bored on the first day of summer vacation.(:**_

_**Do you guys like Lily's approach on the interviews?**_

_**Alright so review, favorite, add to your alerts, and PM me any suggestions for it.**_

_**I'm still waiting on those names for both of the tributes from the following Districts: 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11. I just thought that I might want some input from you guys on the names, but if I don't get them in time then I'll probably look for all of them myself. :p**_

_**Bye!**_


	15. There's No Comfort in Jumping

**Chapter 15**

When I am released from Mary and Furlow's custody, I set off to find Alexander. They had drilled me and I had smoothly alternated angles. And might I add, I did so perfectly.

After 5 solid minutes of searching for him, Ademia finds me and drags me to dinner. "Victors need their strength!" Why is everyone assuming that I will win?

"There you are," says Alexander when we have reached the dining room.

"I was looking everywhere for you!"

"Really?" he says with a confused look on his face.

"No, I was looking for your identical twin in a tower where only tributes live." I answer, my voice heavy with sarcasm.

"So Mark _did _find his way here!"

I push him playfully and we start our meal. We all keep the conversation alive by adding useless bits of information here and there.

Percy and Victoria, Alexander's stylist, have joined us tonight so I ask the question on all of our minds, "What will we be wearing?"

"You tell me."

I smile and say, "Just make sure it's not last minute this time, please? You scared me half to death when you took off with all of those fabrics last time."

He just smiles and nods, and then Alexander says, "Let's just hope that there is no dart this time." I instinctively touch my arm. The exact spot where the dart punctured my skin.

Percy waves away his words though and supplies, "You will be in protective costumes. Under your clothes there will be skintight body armor. It's thin, but will protect you from even bullets."

"Will people notice?" Alexander wonders aloud.

"No, it blends in with your skin tone. The only vulnerable part of you will be your head." Victoria then explains.

"Oh joy! Let's all hope that they are terrible shots!" I say, rolling my eyes.

"Shut up and be positive for once, Lily." Alexander teases.

"This is why I like Mark better than you."

After we finish dinner and our discussions, everybody begins to trickle away until I'm alone with Alexander. Well, except for the attendants.

"Tomorrow is going to be hell," I say, breaking the ominous silence.

"I thought you said that today was going to be hell?"

"Every day in the Capitol is like hell."

"Yea, but it's _comfortably furnished_."

I smile, and soon we wander over to the window. For a few minutes we admire the view, and soon I grow tiresome. I lead Alexander down to my room and again we are drawn to the window.

"It wouldn't be so bad if I just jumped. I'd show them defiance in every way. They would have no Games without their tributes. I wouldn't be their pawn in this sick little game they have set up in the hopes of controlling everyone. They know that they can never control absolutely _everyone._ Besides, killing off children won't do shit."

My voice is surprisingly calm, and it only serves to scare Alexander even more. He steps away from me and says, "Please, don't even _think _about stuff like that Lily. If you jumped, think about the consequences. What would become of me? Of your family and friends? Of everybody?"

I'm shocked because I thought he of all people would agree with me.

"Don't even try, anyways. The windows don't open. When we were fighting I tried to open mine so I could jump. It wouldn't budge."

Tears spring into my eyes and I wrap my arms around him. _Why would he jump? He had a lot going for him. His looks, his wealth, his reputation, everything. Everything except the odds. Those odds would never be in anyone's favor._

"That fight got to you that much?" I ask.

"Yea, if you hadn't come to my room soon after I would have stolen a knife from the dinner table or something."

By now I'm bawling my eyes out, "Please, no, never. Don't ever do that. It's unthinkable."

"Then please tell me that you won't either, okay?"

When I don't answer immediately, he takes my face into his hands. This may be the one time in my life that I've ever been scared to meet someone's gaze. "Look at me," he whispers fiercely, as if reading my thoughts. Reluctantly, I slide my gaze to match his. "Lily, don't even think about those horrible thoughts, okay?" He sees me still hesitate, so he then adds, "For me?"

"Fine," I say after a while. "But only for you."

"Good," he says with a sigh of relief.

I wrap my arms around his shoulders, then when I have that gut clenching feeling of something not being right I say, "Well, victors need their sleep too. Go on then, back to your room!" Then I give him a peck on the cheek that also doesn't feel right. It only lasts for a second though. I guess I'm getting better at pushing it down. That or I'm getting used to the idea of being with him.

At first he looks surprised, but he leaves anyways.

I clean up for bed, and then I go to his room.

"Hullo there, sir." I say.

"Hey if you didn't notice I'm trying to get some victor's sleep here," he says with a smile and gesturing to his room.

I smile, then step through the threshold. "I couldn't stand the thought of you going to bed lonely."

"You mean you wanted me to comfort you so you could sleep, like in the old days?"

"Actually, I was hoping to return the favor."

He smiles, but doesn't comment. Then he climbs into bed and pats a spot next to him. He means for me to climb in next to him, but I sit next to him instead. When I feel that even sitting on his bed doesn't seem right, I pull up a reclining chair next to his bed instead.

I try to soothe him for a while from my chair while he lays on his side smiling at me. When it becomes obvious that he isn't going to fall asleep after the first half hour I fetch the glass jar from my room and rig it up with the string in Alexander's room. I make sure that it will keep making that unearthly tinkling for a while, clear away a large open space, and then start my dance.

"I remember that. You showed everybody a long time ago…"

I smile and answer, "I just hoped that you would remember."

From then on I dance in silence, each of my moves précised and graceful. It's another hour before Alexander falls asleep. When he does I kiss his forehead, and that feeling lasts for only a second. _I guess before I just wasn't used to the fact that I was finally going to be with him. _Then I put the furniture back in their proper places and sink into the recliner I was sitting in earlier. After that I drift off to sleep while admiring how peaceful Alexander looks in his sleep.

_**Awwww, isn't that sweet? But also creepy. Very much creepy. But mostly sweet. Let's just stick with the sweet part…**_

_**Their history goes WAY back.(:**_

_**Guys, please don't leave me hanging. I'm still waiting for those names for the tributes from the following Districts: 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11. I also wouldn't mind a backstory with each name. I know I originally said no backstory needed, but it might be nice to have one. C: Just give me the name in a review or PM me. Thanks!**_

_**Alright to review, add to favorites and alerts, then don't forget to PM me any suggestions!**_

_**Bye!**_


	16. 3 Hours Lost, Still Looks Good

**Chapter 16**

When I begin to stir the next morning, I become aware of the fact that someone is stroking my cheek.

"Good morning, Lily."

"Hey there, Alexander," I say, finally opening my eyes. I smile at the sight of him, yawn, and then stretch my stiff limbs. I don't care how plush a couch is, sleeping on one all night isn't the most comfortable thing in the world.

"Sleep well?" Alexander asks, still stroking my cheek.

"Yea, pretty much. You?"

"I dreamt about you dancing in a meadow with that sound of coal against glass going on in the background." He's more than a little embarrassed since his cheeks flare with color.

I smile, catch his hand, and then intertwine my fingers into his. "I dreamt about us, together…" It's my turn for my cheeks to flush with color.

Just then Alexander's prep team bursts through the door.

"We need to start on those eyebrows!"

"Forget the eyebrows; his nose looked like a third earlobe last time, except on his face! Honestly, I…"

They spot me and Alexander together.

"I'll leave you guys now… Percy will probably want them to start on me now too…"

A woman who is just skin and bones gathers her wits enough to say, "You were supposed to have been started on 3 hours ago!"

I yelp and run for the door, no time to say goodbye to Alexander. I sprint for my room which is usually a minute's walk away if I go slow, and cover the distance in 5 seconds. I burst through the door, and my prep team takes me into their care. They work furiously, trying to compensate for the last 3 hours.

Their hands never stop moving the entire time. I hadn't even sat down yet and they were working on everything about me. All of that work going on and they still work up a storm of questions. Once the questions are formed they hurl them at me like a 60 mile per hour wind, and I can just barely keep up with them. Most of them are asking my whereabouts all morning long, so it's easy to stay caught up with those.

By lunch they have made up for the lost time, and I'm able to go and join Alexander to eat.

"Looking stunning as usual Lily," Alexander says when I walk into the room.

"Thank goodness. My prep team just looked like a blur of hands the whole time, I was afraid I was going to look like a war zone or something."

"You would look amazing no matter what."

"As long as I'm not standing next to you I should look fine."

"Well, I would like to apologize for my good looks then because I will always want you by my side."

We both start to lean in, but Percy walks in and says, "Come on Lily! Don't think I didn't hear about those 3 hours of lost time! I'm making sure that you are early!"

I raise an eyebrow, but don't comment or protest. I get up, squeeze Alexander's hand, let go, and then leave with Percy.

"I guess now I've lost my privileges to eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom."

"No, I just wanted to punish you this once since you were so late."

"I can feel your wrath," I say rolling my eyes.

"You will soon if you don't get quiet about my punishments."

"Oooh, Percy that one hurt!"

"So will the needle when I alter your dress."

I give him a shocked expression and say, "Why so violent?"

"Me? Violent? Never," He answers coolly.

We reach the door to my room and soon we are serious again. My prep team engulfs me once more and after another few hours of violating my personal space, it's time to me to try on my interview dress.

I'm at a loss for words when I look in the mirror. I'm the ocean again, except now the scene is on a beautifully calm day on the water. There are hundreds of shades of lighter blues in the dress. The waves lap against each other every time I move, but overall it's still pretty calm. There is no train this time, but it does reach the floor and there is also a slit that runs all the way from the bottom of the dress to my thigh, exposing my left leg. Again, it's sleeveless but this time there is nothing to cover my shoulders with. No cape, not even a jacket. It looks like I will be barefoot, but on top of the protective suit I have flesh colored tights with beautiful shimmery designs made up of simple swirl patterns put together. Thanks to the tights, it looks like my feet and shins are tattooed. I am still the ocean.

"Percy, I don't know what to say…"

"Then don't say anything."

I smile at his short reply. My face is again only highlighted here and there, but my hair is braided along the sides of my head, but my hair still falls in a glossy curtain at my shoulders, reminding me of a waterfall.

"Simple and elegant," Even if it does give off an ocean effect, the dress does have a simple air about it.

Percy beams, "I hoped you would get it."

"Well, now that I'm dressed for slaughter, what do I do?"

"Go meet the only people worse than the other tributes. These people are absolutely nuts about you."

"Who exactly are we talking about?"

"Capitol citizens."

"It was nice knowing you."

_**Like her interview outfit? Well the next chapter and part of the one after that are dedicated to the interviews. I'm pretty sure that after that the story goes into the interview. At someone's request I am trying to make the Games as intense as I can. C:**_

_**Yea, that's right people. I take requests. ;D That's why you should PM or review. Adding the story to your favorites and alerts isn't bad either…**_

_**Guys, if I don't get the names soon for those tributes then it will take a LOT longer for me to write the next chapters. Here's a list of the following tribute names that I STILL need: 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11.**_

_**Sorry if I'm coming across and mean and easily provoked right now, I am just kind of getting writer's block and it annoys me. I have no idea how I am going to get to the next checkpoint I've set up for myself…**_

_**This is getting WAY too long. Bye!**_


	17. Interviews Times Two

**Chapter 17**

That night it was a shock.

We were all told that it was going to be one-on-one interviews with a man named Olus Faulkner. Why are there 2 chair set up on the stage next to him?

"I heard that we're being interviewed with our districtmate."

Karina has come out of nowhere. As always she is being shadowed by Seth. The rest of pack is a bit slower to follow.

"2 people in 3 minutes? I doubt that," I say, more to reassure myself than anyone else.

"They double to time period, smart ass." I'm not surprised by Seth, coming to her rescue.

"Better to be a smart ass than a dumbass," replies Alexander, coming to _my _aid.

"This ought to be interesting." I say, cutting off anything that Seth was about to say.

"We'd better get ready," Grey growls, and soon we are all seated.

"Welcome, everyone, to the interviews of the very First Annual Hunger Games." Olus Faulkner's voice booms over the speaker system, and I pretend to flinch. Let's see how badly that throws everyone off… Oh how I love messing with my opponents.

"I know we told you all that we would be doing one-on-one interviews with our tributes, but we thought that we would make it special this year."

"What are they up to?" I whisper to the District 3 boy next to me. He hasn't exactly been the most eager person here to talk to me.

"No. Idea…" He answers out of the corner of his mouth through gritted teeth.

"We thought that we would have a reaping from those who were already reaped. We will now choose a male and a female tribute to interview together."

_Reaping us again? That means it's going to be at random… I might not be interviewed with him… But he's the only reason that I would ever do a double interview. The odds haven't been with me, so maybe they've just been stockpiled and will be used now. That makes some sense, right?_

"Looks like you will look even better since I won't be next to you."

"Shut up Alexander," I say with a smile and a light laugh.

"First up…" says Olus, reaching into a glass bowl, "Lily Gallina and…" Oh gosh, who is he going to pick out of that bowl? He goes and picks a name out of the other bowl. "Lily Gallina and Rhett Zalis."

It looks like 'Lily Logic' doesn't work after all.

I stand up smiling of course, and have Rhett escort me to the chair onstage.

"Hullo Olus," I say. "Hullo Panem."

The crowd goes nuts. _Wow, just 4 words and it's like I've made the most amazing speech of a lifetime to these people_. It's quite sad actually.

"Wow, you have that crowd going for you there Ms. Gallina!" says Olus.

"Probably just pity from that dart attack," I say waving the compliment aside.

"No way," says Rhett. "You are just naturally likeable, right guys?" He's directing his question towards the audience. They all reply enthusiastically.

"Please, I'm not even that funny. You, on the other hand, are."

He snorts and replies. "Funny looking maybe."

"Oh no, definitely not. I would bet you almost anything that more than half of the audience wants you badly. Especially in that suit," He has on a suit the color of coal dust and has miner boots on. This outfit wouldn't compliment anyone but him.

The audience supports my theory and Olus finally says, "We need to actually start this interview now!"

I laugh then say, "Alright, ask away."

"Don't you mean, 'Alright, shoot'?" Asks Rhett. My arm throbs.

"Maybe."

"4 minutes left, guys," warns Olus.

"Alright, shoot," I say while smiling at Rhett.

"What made you volunteer at the reaping, Lily?" Oh no, let's just hope that we don't get as far as I did with Ademia. The audience can't have that. It's one of the only things in the world that is truly mine. All mine. Well, and Alexander's…

"Breeze Climpf didn't deserve such a horrible death."

"How do you know that she would die?"

"Well, there's always someone better. And even she didn't deserve to be killed."

"What do you mean by 'even she'?"

"There's a small rivalry between us. We both fell for the same boy, she is extremely mean to me because of it, stuff like that."

"Who is this boy?"

"You'll find out soon enough."

"Alright, fair enough. How did you pull off a 12 as your training score then?"

"That is also for me to know and for you to find out."

"She's a tough nut to crack! I wouldn't want to be the one trying to get information out of her!" Olus directs at the audience. Is he suggesting someone will torture me later on? "Okay, well Rhett. How did you pull of that 9 of yours?"

"Well you see, all you have got to do is eat 3 square meals a day, and in 3 days you have had 9 meals. That's how I get 9."

"You know that's not what I meant," says Olus chuckling.

"Actually, I didn't," he says adapting a completely innocent face.

"Taking her lead like a real man, huh Rhett?"

"Yes sir. I'd be a fool not to; it's always the pretty ones that are dangerous."

The crowd gives a sigh and one person begins it. Mob hysteria is like the snowball effect, where it only keeps growing as it plummets down. A scrawny looking man has started it this time, "YOU GUYS ARE IN LOVE! THAT'S WHO LILY GALLINA LOVES! RHETT ZALIS!"

"Let me reassure you, I am _not _in love with Rhett Zalis."

"HOW DO WE KNOW FOR SURE?" It's the same man as before.

"Because, well, um…" I should have a million different reasons for why it couldn't be Rhett, but they all escape me at this very moment. I can't think straight, my mind is a mess, I'm so confused. The reasons were right there, I just had them, and I now rack my brain for them.

"WHAT? ARE YOU AT A LOSS FOR WORDS SINCE WE FOUND OUT?" The same man demands. It's the same man, over and over again. Is he drunk or something?

"BECAUSE I LOVE ALEXANDER O'NEIL!"

The words tumble out of my mouth before I can stop them.

_**Ya digg?**_

_**Okay guys I'm sorry if this seems like the original **__**The Hunger Games **__**by Suzanne Collins, but I had to find a way to make it meet my criteria: It had to be what seemed romantic to most people, but make it seem like her world was going to end. I mean seriously, it wouldn't seem as sincere if there were kids dying all around them…**_

_**I'd like to thank you, District3, for giving me the names of (duh) both District 3 tributes. Chance and Doyle **__**will **__**be coming up later on. Who knows? They might be important.(;**_

_**My author's notes are always way too long…**_

_**Last announcement, I promise. Well I just wanted to warn you guys that this is going to be what seems like an extremely long story because, well, it is. I don't know how to shorten it **__**and **__**add all of the twists that I so desperately want to have in here.**_

_**Alright review, add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**You guys must really want to make me do a lot of research… I will probably end up looking for all of the names I haven't gotten. I still need the names of the tributes for the following Districts: 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11.**_

_**Bye!**_


	18. The Maze of Life is Difficult

**Chapter 18**

_Dammit… There were a million legitimate reasons to explain how I'm not in love with Rhett and I just decide to blurt out who I really love… I'm such an idiot…_

"Happy now?" Rhett demands of the man quietly. The man who was so loud but has now fallen silent along with the rest of the crowd…

"Besides, I didn't know Rhett until I saw the Reaping videos." _Oh so __**now **__I decide to get smart and remember the biggest and most simple reason for how and why it couldn't have been Rhett._

"Well, we've got a minute or two to kill," says Olus quietly.

"Give me a rock and I'll be sure to kill it," replies Rhett sourly.

I adopt a horrified face and say, "I hope that you won't be doing the same to me!" The audience is ours again, cheering even louder than before. Well, if that's even possible. I was just trying to help Rhett out; it's just instinct for me to help out other people.

"Me too…" He whispers. His voice is lost in the uproar of the crowd, but I can read lips. I pretend like I have no idea what he might have just said.

"How do you like your dress there, Lily?" Asks Olus, trying to get this interview back on track.

"It's wonderful! I absolutely love it; it reminds me so much of home."

"That's great! I'm sure we all love it too!" Of course the audience agrees. Man, are they just trying to win me back by applause or so stupid that they can't remember what just happened 30 seconds ago?

"Thank you all! You're WAY too kind!" I might as well let them think that I accept their apology. So what if I could've milked it and gotten a few sponsors out of it? I don't accept pity money or charity gifts. I want to win sponsors by kicking ass in that arena. Not by looking pretty or innocent.

"I probably shouldn't mention this, but what a debut you had at the opening ceremonies!"

"What debut? I fell, got a concussion, and caused for the ceremonies to be cancelled." I say with a light laugh to show that I'm good humored and partly to show that I'm kidding.

"But that was an amazing display of acrobatics; are you a gymnast back home?"

"Dancer, actually."

"Amazing," says Rhett.

Just then a buzzer sounds , and our time is up. Thank goodness.

Next up is Karina and Seth. Is it possible for a person to steal luck? If so, she probably took mine when she bumped into me a while ago.

I'm not paying any attention; again my mind is a mess. I'm confused by even the simplest things, and it feels like a never-ending maze. For a brief time Alexander had guided me through this maze of life, made me feel safe. But now I'm alone again and losing my sanity fast. Without Alexander, I'm a horrible person. No compassion, no anything. I'm nothing without him.

I'm brought back to my guide when Alexander and Lavender are being interviewed with each other. For a short time I smile at the prospect of seeing him again. _I didn't lose him, he's right there. He will help me, make me complete again. _I'm happy to see him, and then they both start talking.

"Hullo there, Lavender! Looking stunning as usual!"

His exact words to me. They cut deep into my heart and skin me alive. Except, I'm still able to see and hear everything they say. I so badly wish that I couldn't.

"Why, thank you Alexander! You're not so bad yourself!"

They push their chair together and begin their interview. Their extremely flirtatious interview…

I'm back in my maze, more lost than ever. Except now, I'm underwater, and I have my leg caught in a tangle of kelp. Kelp that resembles Alexander…

_He's holding me back. I can do __**so **__much more without him. __But I will never be able to let him go… Just like the kelp, he won't be able to let me go either, right? __No. I'm better off on my own. I will win these Games, and make sure that Alexander dies at my own hands. Everyone will. The Capitol doesn't have a clue about just how powerful I am. Even the Gamemakers don't._

I surface from my maze long enough to see Alexander and Lavender flirting and holding hands. _That sick, 2 timing… _No words can even _begin _to describe how I feel about him right now. Well, at least none that are very nice.

Once again I submerge myself in my miseries, but somehow the buzzer cuts through my subconscious, numbed world. Reluctantly, I get up; take a bow, wave, smile, and then leave. Alexander is right by my side the whole time. _Why can't these chairs be farther apart?_

By the time I get to my floor, Alexander is already there awaiting my arrival.

"Please, Lily, let me explain!"

"Why should I? I've declared my love for you on national television. Everyone knows now. Besides, I have a pretty good idea about what you were trying to do by flirting with Lavender back there. Everyone does."

"Yeah, I should expect you to be angry but please Lily-"

"'Please, Lily, let me explain that I am a 2 timing bastard. Let me explain how I go around saying I love every girl that I meet, that I never loved anyone but myself. That I only want to survive by flirting with every girl here.'" This whole time I've been storming back to my room, but he has stayed by my side and trying to stop me from getting very far. By now we are only in the living room.

He grabs my wrist to stop me from going any farther, then opens his mouth to explain everything to me. My face only shows shock. No fear, because he doesn't scare me. I just want to be left alone right now, so I'll use the classic strategy of getting what I want.

Right before he starts talking, I start crying and choke out, "Alexander! Please, stop! You're hurting me!"

After a second or two, he releases his grip on me, so I run for my room. I slam the door shut and block it with a chair.

He comes crashing into my door 10 seconds after I set up the chair. I'm faster than him, much faster. That, plus I caught him off guard.

"LILY! I'M _SORRY!"_

"SORRY DOESN'T SOLVE MY DAMN PROBLEMS, NOW DOES IT?"

"LET ME EXPLAIN! COME ON, I'M NOT GOING TO SHOUT IT THROUGH THIS DOOR!"

"GOOD, BECAUSE I'M NOT _OPENING _THIS DOOR!"

"LILY! GALLINA!"

Aw crap. It's Percy, and he seems mad as hell.

"OPEN THIS DOOR, **NOW**!"

I throw the chair to the side and fling open the door. I'm not going to die before the Games even begin. And especially not at the hands of my own stylist.

"Let Alexander explain himself. Unless you want me to explain..?" He asks Alexander.

"I'll explain. I just want you to be there in case she decides to go beast mode on my ass."

"Which she _won't,_" says Percy raising an eyebrow at me warningly.

Dammit, I actually was going to knock Alexander out and drag him into one of the closets or something… Looks like that plan is ruined now.

They file into my room and take seats by the window. How ironic. I was going to break that window later to jump. And I was going to use that exact chair that Alexander is sitting in to do it. Yet another one of my plans, ruined.

"Okay, why the hell did you have to embarrass me like that in front of the entire nation?" I demand.

"Might want to sit down for this," He says. When I don't make a move towards a chair, he continues anyways. "I did that for you," I open my mouth so he adds hastily, "No interruptions please?" I nod halfheartedly. "I'm planning on you winning. I had to do something to make the audience and sponsors only love you, since you made me look so good. So I then decided to present myself as a 2 timing son of a bitch who everyone would hate."

"No… No… NO!" I've truly gone mad, huh?

"Yes, Lily. It's true. He didn't want to hurt you, but that was the only way to help you." Says Percy. I forgot he was here for a second.

"Like in the hallway just now?" I ask in a weak voice.

"Exactly like that Lily," Alexander answers. That's why he let go of my wrist when I said he was hurting me…

"You know that I'm still going to kill Lavender, right?"

He laughs and says, "I have a feeling that no matter what I say, I can't convince you not to."

"I wasn't asking for your permission. I was simply asking if you knew or not."

"Fair enough," he answers with a shrug.

"I'll leave you two to make up," says Percy as he gets up and leaves the room.

Alexander tries to gather me in his arms, but I push him away and say, "I'm not _that _quick to trust. Unlike the Capitol audience, I'm smart enough to remember what happened more than 2 seconds ago, so I'm good without your hugs."

"You're right. I kind of had that coming. I need to really earn it back."

"Yeah, you _really _did have that coming."

He smiles sweetly, that I have the urge to hug him but then that uneasy feeling comes up again. I realize that I don't need that feeling anymore; it must have just been instinct. Like a sixth sense warning me about that 'betrayal' on television. I can finally get rid of it. Finally, I give in to my desire and give him a hug and start to cry. For real this time. He holds me close to his body, warming me, comforting me.

"I thought that I'd lost you. That none of the things that happened between us were real"

"You'll never lose me, Lily. Ever."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

I smile, and then Ademia comes in. Of course.

"Dinner time you two. I want it to be special. It will be the last proper dinner you two have before you leave."

"Okay Ademia," I say. I'm not up for the effort, so I go straight to dinner instead of cleaning up and changing. Besides, I'm not quite ready to let Alexander out of my sight. Not quite yet.

The food tastes even better than usual, and I allow myself a bit more than usual.

Alexander is too precious for me to leave alone, so I bring him to my room with me and we both prepare for bed there. When the door turns out to be locked and he can't get back to his room, he offers to share my bed with me.

"How very kind of you, but I think I will let you sleep on the recliner over there." I say, pointing to a plush chair a couple of feet from the bed.

He just shrugs and settles into it with a pillow and blanket, and we just watch each other while we fall asleep. We pretend to fall asleep again after woken by each other's nightmares or nightmares of our own. Having him there makes me feel safe, complete even.

When I truly fall asleep, I begin to realize something. Not only was Alexander the kelp that held me down in the maze, but also that thin strand that kept me from doing horrible things. Losing my mind and sanity. Ending the lives of others.

Ending my own.

_**Man, that was a LONG chapter. I'm just wondering if it was worth the wait... Sorry guys! I kind of didn't notice that it had been so long. :/ (A week is a long time for me…)**_

_**Okay, time for a discussion to make you guys want to read more! How did you like the interviews? DOUBLE THE TRIBUTE-NESS. HECK YEA. Well, for you guys that told me not to play the love angle too much… I'M SORRY.): I couldn't help it… Well, I will keep the arena pretty intense though. Intenseness is amazing. I eat it for breakfast.**_

_**I'm such a freak… Don't judge. No hate guys, kay? Kay.**_

_**Alright I will be going on vacation next week, hanging by the pool all day, but I'll stay up at night to write for you guys. I probably will stay up anyways… Feel special anyways…**_

_**Okay I no longer need help with those names and backstories; I've been feeling creative lately.(:**_

_**Review, add to your alerts and favorites, and PM me any suggestions. Thanks!**_

_**Bye!**_


	19. Beaten and Pushed

**Chapter 19**

I'd like to say otherwise, but these thoughts are indeed my own. I so dearly wish that I could stop them.

I guess the only thing I can do is not tell Alexander. He would freak out if he knew. So there is no way that anyone, excluding myself of course, will ever know.

In the morning Ademia basically breaks down the door with all of her knocking. I have to get ready in my room as Alexander does so in his. The door had magically unlocked.

Next I will have to say my goodbyes to Victoria, Mary, Furlow, and finally Ademia. Believe it or not, it would probably be the hardest to say goodbye to Ademia. She has been helping me through everything and is one of the few people that I love in the world. We barely know anything about each other, but it doesn't matter. We have a connection that was immediate. My father and I connected a long time ago, and I used to love him. Kind of like a regular father-daughter relationship. Then the rebellion came along and I began to hate him with all of my heart. My memories engulf me once more…

I was only 12 when my father began to push me away from him. The first week of jail was okay, since we went through it together. Until he met his wife there, and she was nice right up until she opened her mouth.

She was a total brat, and was used to getting whatever she wanted. She was only about 10 years older than me. She hated me from the beginning, and when she said the word my father would hit me. That's how my life was ruined, my own loving father abusing me. After about 5 months of this she became pregnant and if I ever disobeyed her or talked back, then a new bruise would form. One time, she went too far.

"Your sister and mother must have been dogs, if that's how ugly you came out. Look at that ratty hair, and those ugly eyes. You're so ugly, I mean like it's not even funny. Yeah, seriously seriously." She had said when she saw the look on my face. "Now like go make yourself useful or something and get me something to eat, you little bitch."

"What did you just call my mother and sister?" I had been furious, and to make matters worse that particular day was my birthday.

"I just called them ugly dogs. Have you got a problem with that?"

"Yea, and I've also got a problem with you. Just leave my family alone you home wrecker."

"Listen here, bitch. It's not home wrecking if there is no home to wreck."

"Are saying my parents never got married, and that my mom was a slut?"

"I'm saying that this home was already wrecked before I came. Your mother is dead, get over it. Besides, honey for all we know about her she _was_ a slut."

I had lost my cool when she said that, and I was about to slap her when my father just decided to walk in.

"Oh thank goodness you're here to save me! She was trying to kill me and the baby!" What the hell? Since when did a nice, red, welt on the face cause death?

My father didn't need any further prompting; he pulled me away no matter how much I protested.

"You dumb bitch, you don't hurt my family," my father had said in a voice I had never heard before. Well, one I hadn't heard in a very long time. His voice had a protective tone to it. Why would he need to protect his 'family' from me? I _am _his family.

"Dad! Don't you see what she's doing to you? Before _she _came along we would be happy and stick together! Now she's ruined everything and is conning you! She wants you to take her side, but she called mom and Natalie ugly dogs! She called me a bitch! She can't judge your wife and daughters like that! She's making you abuse me!"

"Shut up Lily! None of that is true!" The abuse was true.

"None of the 'love' that she gives you is true! I've seen her with several other guys-"

"LILY! YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT TRUE!" He lost it with me then, and hit me with anything he could get his hands on. He eventually found a cane and broke 3 of my ribs. I took the blows standing up and tried to explain to him, but he wouldn't listen. I even looked him straight in the eye. But he believed a stranger over his own flesh and blood. A cheating stranger, to be exact. Sharon, my soon to be stepmother, would pay for destroying the one person I had left.

My life is fast-forwarded to after the release. Sharon was yelling at me yet again.

"DON'T YOU _DARE _WALK OUT OF THAT DOOR! YOU MUST OBEY ME, OR ELSE I WILL TELL YOUR FATHER!"

I didn't care. I just wanted to get the hell out of there and not do the chores that she would claim credit for later on. Besides, I didn't fear my father anymore. If he laid a finger on me, I would fight back. He knew that I would, and he also knew that I was more skilled than him.

"I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU OR OBEY YOU BITCH! YOU'RE NOT MY MOM!"

"I BEG TO DIFFER!"

"PLEASE DO. I JUST WON'T BE AROUND TO LISTEN." That bitch. She could _never _replace my mother.

After that I had stormed out of the house and left her to scream all she wanted. _Let my father come and beat me. _I had thought. _I'll be ready._

I come back to the present, and am depressed once more when I realize that I'm still supposed to be saying goodbye.

_**So now you guys know why her father, and the rest of her 'family' hates her. Except for Sharon. Of course, nobody really knows anything about Sharon. I don't really see her showing up very often later on, sorry guys. And don't you hate goodbyes too? /3**_

_**I'm trying to keep this short… Oh, I got everything up to date on my computer. I have everything typed up from my notebook.(: I will now update at will. Until I have to start writing again…**_

_**Review, add to your alerts as well as your favorites, and don't forget to PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye guys!**_


	20. PreGame Insanity

_**WARNING: **__**There will be a lot of swearing in this chapter, sorry if you don't exactly like me swearing in this. I'll explain at the end.**_

**Chapter 20**

I've never been good at goodbyes. Nobody really is. I choke up with tears and can barely choke out that one word. "Goodbye."

Everybody either nods or says, "Goodbye," as well. Everyone except for my mentors. When I say this to them Furlow answers, "No. This isn't a goodbye. If you go into that arena thinking you will die, you will die."

"Then what is it?"

"This is just 'See you later.'" Replies Mary.

"Then see you later." The problem is that I won't.

"See you later," They both reply.

Soon I'm on the hovercraft, having a tracking device implanted into my arm. Then I'm with Percy in a dining room eating breakfast while overlooking the lands far below…

"6 inches thick, Lily. Don't even think about it." Percy's voice breaks through my subconscious and I am snapped back to the reality of my current situation.

"How is it that everyone is a mind reader these days?" I ask jokingly.

"Well at least one person isn't."

"Who might that be?"

"You."

I smile and say, "That was offensive Percy."

"It was meant to be sweetie."

I roll my eyes and join him at the table again. Even if I'm not hungry now, I will be soon. In the arena…

My view of the outside world is replaced by darkness. All of a sudden, I become claustrophobic and I attack the wall of darkness that was once my world.

"We're close to the arena. They've blocked off the view so you can't have any unfair advantages," says Percy in a soothing voice.

I calm down, and rejoin him at the table. I don't even make an effort to eat anymore. I can't eat or really do anything knowing that I am becoming the Capitol's dancing monkey.

"Lily, there's one thing that I want to ask you."

"Shoot."

"At first you seemed like you were ready to rip someone's head off at a moment's notice. You had covered it up with a fake niceness. Now you're genuinely nice and care about the lives of the other tributes. Why?" He asks. It's actually a pretty accurate summary of my behavior.

"I got to know them more. They deserve better than this, they all do. When we first met, I had been extremely upset with Alexander and myself. Then he helped clear away this fogginess and I saw everyone for what they were. Even when the fog came back for a while, I remembered what everyone is like…"

"Ahhh, that explains most of it… Wait, so if you love Alexander that much, why were you so reluctant to tell the nation that you loved him? It gave you two such an edge."

"That was one of the few things I had been sure of. One of the things that was supposed to be only ours."

He grows silent at this and we both just stare at the floor. Then a buzzer goes off and I get dressed in my clothes for the arena.

All of the clothing that I'm in is and will protect me from the cold, but also has breathing holes to cool me down in the heat. It would dry easily if I get it wet that way… This thing is durable and weather proof but it will rip easily from a weapon. The shirt and pants are colors of the sea and almost skintight, but there is also a dully colored mottled jumpsuit that I will wear on top. All of this is extremely flexible fabric. Perfect. I have on knee high black leather boots, but the soles are thin and flexible like running shoes. For some reason there is a small device on my collar that goes around my mouth and nose. A breathing device maybe?

"It's going to be pretty damn extreme in there…"

I emerge from the changing area to find Percy in a similar outfit. His face is pale, but his jaw is set.

"What's going on?" I ask. I'm extremely confused right now.

"I'm a player in these Games as well." He answers.

I faint there and then. If not for Percy, I would have cracked my head open on a table.

I open my eyes and Percy starts talking rapidly, before I can start talking.

"You have to get your stylist to a designated drop zone to get to the Cornucopia. The first ones there get the best things. After getting you into the room where the Cornucopia is located your stylist will be taken to a safe location away from the arena. I don't participate in any bloodbath; all you have to do is get me there safely."

My jaw drops and I go feral. "Alive? The Capitol is contradicting itself. There are only supposed to be 24 tributes in that arena, nothing about their stylists."

"Lily, quiet. Don't let this rule change throw you off guard." I'm anything _but _off guard right now, but Percy wouldn't know that. "And yes, alive. No supplies otherwise. The way to the place is extremely well trapped, but far from impossible. One false step though, and your stylist is dead. The tribute, on the other hand, barely gets a scratch. They think the Games will get higher ratings if people get to watch a child starve to death on live television."

"So anything goes with them?"

"Yes."

"Can't the other tributes follow a path that another tribute sets?"

"Impossible. Each tribute is blocked off from the others and has their own special obstacle course designed for them."

I have run out of things to say, so I go back to rage. "They can't do this!"

"They can, and will for that matter."

"THEY ARE DISOBEYING THEMSELVES! THOSE BASTARDS! TAKING CHEAP SHOTS AT US LIKE THIS! FUCK THEM! FUCK THEM ALL! THEY CAN KISS MY ASS AND GO TO HELL! THEY'RE TOO COWARDLY TO FIGHT US THEMSELVES, SO THEY PIT US AGAINST EACH OTHER! MAKING _**CHILDREN **_FIGHT TO THE DEATH, AND WATCHING THEM FOR THEIR ENTERTAINMENT! SICK BASTARDS!"

Wow, I really _am _insane. I'm pretty sure I lost my sanity when I volunteered. Looks like I'm being pretty moody today. It's a good thing I'm so disciplined. Most of the time.

"You crazy bitch," says Percy with a laugh.

"I know. I lost my sanity back at the reaping."

"What about Alexander? Didn't he make you sane?"

"Well, this is like a sickness. When I'm with Alexander, it's like a temporary drug. He keeps it away temporarily, but it's always there. Just lurking under the surface."

"No cures?"

"There is no cure for insanity."

"I never said you were insane."

"No cures of being a crazy bitch either," I add.

"Ahhh, that explains it."

Then an attendant steps in, a bit scared and nervous since he saw my outbreak, and points to a room we haven't been allowed into so far. "Launch room," he says simply, feet shuffling.

Percy and I enter the room and are directed to step onto metal plates. Soon after a glass tube closes down around each of us. Instinct kicks in. I'm being trapped, someone wants to kill me. I throw myself against the walls repeatedly, trying to break free of these dreaded confinements. Percy gets my attention and mouths. "Don't," I stop immediately. Now isn't the time to do something stupid like show my insanity, or any other weaknesses.

A woman's soothing voice comes on over the speaker, and it wraps a warm blanket around me. She explains the rules of the Games, and I listen intently. No stepping off my plate early or I'll be blown to bits. Stuff like that, that I am now committing to memory.

It's a vertical drop down, and I go at about 50 miles per hour. I'm completely unhinged on the way down. Right before the drop it felt like the President had whispered into my ear, even though it was through the speaker system. It was a chilling experience, and to make matters worse he had whispered, "Good luck, Lily Gallina. I'll be watching you especially, remember that."

_**Sorry for all of the swearing in that on paragraph, guys. I kind of felt it necessary to make her go mad at times, on and off. Don't ask.**_

_**Okay, so how about that? The President is keeping an eye on her especially. Hmm.**_

_**Alright just a heads up guys, I know I mentioned this before but I am going on vacation from Wednesday through Saturday, so I just thought I would remind you guys. Hopefully I can bring my laptop. And hopefully they have internet access…**_

_**Review, add to alerts as well as favorites, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Byeee! BRO FIST.**_


	21. Let the Games Begin

**Chapter 21**

My sanity, as well as my sponsors, would be well and truly gone if I have a breakdown. I can't let my only chances of survival slip through my fingers, because my survival helps to keep others alive as well.

In the short time it takes to hit the ground, I gather myself.

My feet had felt glued to the metal plate on the way down, but now I can lift them easily. To my left I see Percy, just a bit disoriented. The tubes are lifted up and the hover plane disappears along with them.

There are metal walls surrounding us on all sides. Behind and in front of me the walls are rounded, while on my sides they are completely straight. My area is shaped like a wedge, so that means the arena is circularly shaped… Interesting.

"Welcome to the 1st Annual Hunger Games!" The voice of our announcer, Waldemar Frobisher, booms over some hidden speaker system. "Tributes, you have exactly 1 minute until you can leave your plate. May the odds be in your favor!"

1 minute. Then I have to get Percy to that drop zone. In this time I will need to assess the area between us and that door at the end of this area. They can't make it impossible, so all of the traps are obvious. The land mines are located at the areas of upturned soil, cannons are sticking out of the walls basically everywhere, there are holes in the walls where I'm sure something nasty will come out of, basically traps set up _everywhere._

"Damn…" I hear Percy whisper from a yard away.

I smile, and then notice something. A pattern, in all of these traps. If I step like this, bend like that, spin, leap, oh gosh. It's the steps to my dance. They've already been watching me.

"Percy!" I almost shout in my frantic state. 10 seconds left.

"What?" Comes his reply.

"You know how to dance?"

A gong goes off, so I grab Percy and hoist him onto my back. He whispers into my ear, "Good choice, I've got 2 left feet." Then I'm off. I have to adjust some of the steps with Percy's extra weight on my back, but other than that I'm fine. Still as graceful as ever.

I'm working my way more carefully past one of the holes in the wall since I found out the hard way that they shoot out shruikens when I ask Percy, "Did you hear the President's voice over the speakers before we went on our free fall?"

"No, why?" He asks me, clearly confused. And worried.

"No reason."

"You wouldn't have asked if you didn't have a reason."

I sigh. "He whispered something to me, right before we shot down here."

"What did he say?"

"He said," I gulp. "He said 'Good luck Lily Gallina. I'll be watching you, remember that.'"

Percy stiffens on my back and says, "He probably said something similar to all of the tributes."

I keep on dancing as fast as I can, completely ignoring Percy's comment since I know that he's lying. I won't be telling anyone else about this.

After a few minutes I reach my door and realize just how much the walls of the room have gone inward. As I watch to see that none of the traps are faced towards us, Percy gets dismounts from my back.

"Good job, Lily. I didn't know you had that in you."

"Thanks."

As Percy goes through a series of complicated looking tests to unlock the door, I notice something at the back on the room.

"Hurry up Percy…"

"Why? None of the traps are faced towards us."

"Then you might want to think again."

He turns around and sees exactly what I'm looking at. All of the traps have been disabled now, and another door has opened at the back of the room revealing a hideous creature.

"Mutt!" Percy shouts and starts frantically pressing away at the screen. Facial recognition, voice recognition, blood test, what haven't they thought of?

"No, really? I thought it was just a giant kitty cat!" I say sarcastically. "Now HURRY UP PLEASE!"

The beast is hideous. It looks like a barracuda mixed with a leopard, lion, cheetah… Damn, pretty much a barracuda mixed with every animal in the cat family there is. Despite its huge size, it moves pretty damn fast on those 4 legs. That thing has tousled, unhealthy fur with large chunks of fur and sometimes flesh missing. It probably ripped its own flesh out, maybe it's insane. Underneath the fur there is the skin of a barracuda, and the face is indescribable. The faces of every creature it was undoubtedly made of are on yet another face, I'm not even sure what to compare that background face to. The faces are all moving and crying out at once. It's horrible…

"We don't have all day Percy!"

"I'm going as fast as I can!"

"It will be here in 30 seconds!"

"I won't be finished in time!"

Shit. "HEY KITTY KITTY KITTY! WANNA PLAY?"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING LILY?"

"BUYING US TIME!"

Then I am off running. I pick up shruikens off of the ground and fire at will. When I am almost out I finally realize that it doesn't do a damn thing to the mutt.

"IS THIS THING INVINCIBLE OR SOMETHING?"

"MAKE IT ROAR AND THROW ONE OF THOSE THINGS INTO ITS MOUTH! IT HAS TO CAUSE SOME INTERNAL BLEEDING!"

"DOES THIS THING EVEN ROAR?"

Just then I find out. The beast opens its overly largemouth, the one belonging to the background face, revealing row upon row upon row of razor sharp teeth.

I look up at the sky and shout, "DAMN GUYS, GOOD LUCK FINDING THAT THING A CHEW TOY!"

Then I throw every last thing I've got. They go down its throat and the beast, puzzled by whatever went into its throat, closes its mouth. We both stare each other down, waiting for something to happen.

When nothing does and the beast just gets pissed from me throwing something into its mouth, I realize that this thing really is invincible.

"SHIT! I'M FRICKEN SCREWED! YOU DONE YET PERCY!"

"BIRTHDAY, MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY, FATHER'S BIRTHDAY, NO SIBLINGS… ALMOST!"

"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?"

"NEVER BEEN MORE SERIOUS IN MY LIFE!"

"HURRY UP OR WE'RE ALL DEAD!"

"NO SHIT! I'M STILL GOING AS FAST AS I CAN! YOU THINK THAT I WOULD SERIOUSLY GO SLOWLY WHEN OUR LIVES ARE AT STAKE?"

"PLEASE TELL ME THAT THEY HAVE SOMETHING ELSE TO HIT THIS THING WITH!"

"GO FOR THE CANNONS! SEE IF THERE ARE ANY SHELLS LEFT!"

Of course, that's when all of the traps start to work again. And apparently, explosives don't work since it has set off about 12 mines, and it just keeps going. They go off once it simply shifts its weight.

I look down and shout, "SHIT!"

"GOT IT OPEN! WHAT ARE YOU UPSET ABOUT!" He says, pushing a final button to make the door slide open.

"I'M STANDING ON A LANDMINE!"

_**Holy shitake mushrooms. She's on a landmine. D: Is this when she dies?**_

_**Find out next week on THE FORGOTTEN GAMES!**_

_**^^You guys know I had to… ;D**_

_**Reviews make me happy. Happy as a mushroom. Why am I still talking about mushrooms…?**_

_**PM me any suggestions, add to your alerts and favorites. Thanks guys!**_

_**Alright, later bros! For you guys that had actually known what I meant by 'BRO FIST!' then STEPHANOOOOO!**_


	22. Control the Emotion

**Chapter 22**

His eyes grow wide and he shouts, "STAY STILL. WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T MOVE!"

"NO, I WAS JUST HOSTING A TEA PARTY! WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING?"

"YOU MIND STOPPING WITH THE SARCASM?"

I start to ignore Percy and refocus on the mutt. Earlier it was pissed from my shruikens. Now all hell has broken loose from those mines…

The beast is frothing from the mouth, and emitting a deep growling from the back of its throat. Its muscles tense, about to pounce, when something pounces on _it _instead.

"PERCY?" I yell, looks like I should have been paying more attention.

"NO, THIS THING JUST GREW A GIANT LUMP ON THE BACK OF ITS HEAD THAT LOOKS LIKE ME. WHAT DO YOU THINK?" The mutt starts writhing, wriggling, and basically just trying to get whatever was on its back _off._

Wow, sarcasm does get really annoying. "GET THE HELL OFF OF THERE! I HAVE AN IDEA!"

He seems reluctant, but I add, "DON'T WORRY! IT'S NOT DANGEROUS!" Just so he can't hear and so I won't be flat out lying I add in under my breath, "For you at least…"

Percy then jumps off of the beast, and I try to get its attention. "HEY THERE, YOU WITH THE FACES!"

It turns to me, and finally finishes what it began earlier. It leaps straight at me, and at the last possible moment before its claws reach me, I jump with all of the strength in my legs and land on top its head. I start running at full speed and run to Percy, who is now waiting at the door. I turn around just in time to see the beast rear back from the explosion, then shut the door. _Damn, I wouldn't want to be stuck in a room with that thing. _I consider the thought then add, _Again…_

Percy gives me a suffocating bear hug, then when I am released from it he slaps me across the face. "You said it wasn't going to be dangerous! You could have gotten yourself killed!"

"Well, I never said anything about _life threateningly _dangerous…" I say, holding a hand to my stinging cheek.

He looks like he is about to give me a serious lecture, then just ends up giving up a few tears and hugging me again. I've never seen him cry.

When one of his tears hits my hand I am pulled back into my memories…

"Lily Pad, I've got to go. The bad people are hurting the good people, and I need to help fix the good people." My sister, Natalie, had said.

I had sniffled and said, "So they can help to fight the bad people again?"

She had stopped her packing to kneel down and wipe the tears from my face, then said, "Yes, to help fight the bad people. I'll be fighting them too."

"I thought you said you were going to be a doctor, not a soldier like Brandon."

She had just chuckled and said, "Well in a way, I will be fighting to help keep those who are on the front lines alive. The only difference between my job and Brandon's is that he will be fighting them directly."

"She applied to get a gun to fight, but they said she was too scrawny to pick one up." Brandon was still at home around that time. But he had left a week after Natalie did, which didn't help much.

I had giggled as Natalie socked him in the arm.

"They did _not._" Natalie had argued.

"Yea they did, Nat."

"Brandon, you know very well that they did not." My mother had been standing in the doorway to the room Natalie and I had shared for a little while, going unnoticed. She had always been the silent type.

"Oh yea, sorry mom. Sorry Nat. Their exact words were, 'Incapable of properly operating a firearm.'"

That sure got me going.

Natalie was older that Brandon by two years, and just a bit taller so she had got him in a headlock and ruffled his close cropped hair a bit.

"Lily Pad, how come you're so quiet?" My mother had asked.

Then I had remembered that my older sister was leaving for war. And that my older brother was soon to follow.

"Natalie and Brandon are leaving me all alone here with you and daddy."

That was when Brandon and Natalie had stopped wrestling, and my mother picked me up. "But they're going to be helping people, Lily Pad."

"Besides, we're also leaving you alone with grandma." Brandon had said, trying to crack a joke but instead having his voice crack with emotion.

I had laughed a bit, but not much. "Lily Pad, we're really sorry we have to leave you, but we have to do our part." Natalie was trying to comfort me again.

"Why can't I do _my _part then?"

My brother looked like he had been about to say, "You're too young Lily Pad." But my mother had cut him off and said, "Don't worry Lily. You will. You won't have to do nothing, because daddy and I will be using that secret base of yours to hide the good people from the bad people."

My 'secret base' was a room next to the basement that my father had built as a panic room. I used it as a secret base and made it comfortable, like a base. It was impossible to find unless you knew it was there. _Perfect for harboring illegal personas. _I had loved that place.

"Okay! I'll get it ready!" Before I was able to run out of the room though, Natalie had scooped me up, and put me in her lap.

"Hold up there, Lily Pad." Her voice was filled with emotion.

"What's wrong, Nat?"

"I just want to spend as much time with you as possible."

"Hey, what about me?" Brandon had budded in.

"I _guess _I could spend time with you too, squirt."

Instead of taking it as an insult he had just laughed and we squeezed together.

"I'll miss you both so much." I had said.

"I will too," Brandon had said.

Instead of saying anything Natalie had just cried silently, hunched over my body protectively. I had pushed her hair back from her face and wrapped my then chubby arms around her neck. Her tears didn't stop for a while, even when Brandon had wrapped his arm around her for comfort. When she was almost finished, her last few tears had landed on my hand, and then she finished packing and left soon after.

When I come back from my flashback, Percy is staring at me strangely.

"For some strange reason, you started writhing on the ground." He explains. This is the first time I've noticed that I'm on the ground. My flashbacks have never been this bad before. I guess this is one of the memories that I had blocked out before, my mind knowing that I wasn't ready until now. My memories pouring back in all of a sudden like that… It burned.

"Oh… Mutt slobber," I say. It's a bad attempt at an excuse, but oh well. Works for me.

He just nods. Then as I remember what I saw in my flashback, I realize something. My mother wasn't killed in vain. She was killed because the Capitol had found out about her harboring rebels.

_**Flashbacks are so fun, aren't they? Well now Lily is able to remember the reason why her mother was killed, do you think she was ready for it? Can she handle it?**_

_**WHO DO YOU GUYS WANT TO WIN THE GAMES? She's in the arena now, and you guys know that she is a good fighter. Will she use those skills? Or will someone get to her first? LET THE GAMES BEGIN.**_

_**Review, add to alerts and your favorites, and finally don't forget to PM me any suggestions you might have.(:**_

_**Bye!**_


	23. Blood Bath at the Cornucopia

**Chapter 23**

A tube comes down to collect Percy, and I say goodbye.

"See you later, sweetie. Wish I could stay longer," Percy says.

"See you later. And Percy, please. I don't want to babysit while fighting for my life," I barely even manage to choke out before the tube fully encloses him.

"Hurry up," he mouths jokingly, so of course I take my sweet time checking out the arena. Well, that's how I make it look. I'm actually observing everything in extreme detail, while making it look like I don't care.

The arena is round, as I had suspected earlier. It is rimmed with dry land starting at the doors lining the walls. It ends after about 2 feet. Then, the land slants down slightly and there is water _everywhere._ There is pretty thick forest, and the roots are all drowned in the water. In the middle of the arena lies a giant, golden Cornucopia. I can see it mostly because it is on a tiny hill above all of the water and glints above the treetops. It also helps that directly above it there is a giant hole in the roof, allowing the sunlight in. The arena itself is about a mile in diameter.

Once Percy is lifted out of the arena safely, I run for the Cornucopia. Other than my door, there are 24 others. Each one is marked with a number and a letter. I'm door 4F. Why is there an extra door? There are only 23 other tributes that need to have an entrance to the arena. Unless the extra door isn't an entrance, but an exit...

I'm a bit more than halfway there when another door opens. _Company._ I pump my legs up and down even faster than before, even though I know I will get there first no problem. I have a head start and I'm faster than anyone here.

Thanks to the water on the floor of the arena, my location is always known. _Dammit Gamemakers, why can't you just let me go through this stealthily?_

The canopy is thick, and the only light source in the room is the hole above the Cornucopia. I have to run from this darkness, and reach the light…

By the time I reach the Cornucopia only 2 other people are in the main arena with me. I take my sweet time looking for the deadliest looking weapons, but make sure I have several knives on me, hidden of course. They're all close at hand just in case I run into a spot of trouble.

I scale the Cornucopia, and then lie in wait. I'm in plain sight, which will to unnerve most people. I lay back and relax, which should startle them even more. It basically says, 'I'm not afraid of any of you. I've got everything you need, so sooner or later you'll just come to me.' That's exactly all I have to do. Lie in wait for the kill. Easy.

There are several bunches of items scattered around the Cornucopia, but I don't bother picking them up. They're all within easy throwing distance.

The first person to join me is Sakura, the girl from 10. I don't hesitate to shoot an arrow through her throat. My inner beast has come out.

Karina and Seth show up together after about an hour of waiting. Nobody else has joined me yet. Thank goodness for that, or else I would've had to have killed them. Only 7 doors remain unopened so far. I let them both join me after shouting "ALLIANCE?" They were all too quick to agree since I was armed and dangerous. They climb up after equipping themselves, and I keep watch. No movements anywhere, not even a ripple. Wait, some movement in the trees. Karina sees it too and shoots the District 11 girl, Kennedy, out of a tree. She's dead before she hits the ground. Yes, she was 18, 3 years older than me, but looks barely 14. She had volunteered for her 12 year old sister, who had looked 8. It's not fair how good people get hurt.

After a while Emerald and Grey join us. I let the others take the kills. I'm still trying to rid myself of the guilt that comes with killing a person.

It's not that hard to kill the other tributes. We're all the way up here with something they need, and they need to come and get it. The only thing that we are lacking that the Capitol wants is intensity. This is a one sided battle, and unfortunately I'm on the winning team.

Some tributes are smart enough to hide under the trees, as to avoid being killed. Lavender, Rhett, and Alexander have yet to show up. _Looks like I couldn't keep my promise to Lavender. I wonder if Rhett got out of his hell hole. What's keeping Alexander so long?_

After several hours the water is stained red. There are 7 dead tributes, probably more since only 4 other people have emerged from their doors in that time frame. I'm going to mourn every single one of them later on. I knew them all personally. They all had real families back home. Families that would actually miss them, their loved ones. My family would be rooting on my killer. Now that I think about it, Janice and her family would have been the only ones that missed me if I hadn't played my role so well. But their lives would have gone on after my death. In the arena, I will be killed. If I go home, Sharon would eventually convince my father to murder me. My best choice is to die here, which is what I plan to do. I won't be going back home. Maybe my life won't go on past this arena. Just maybe.

I hear footsteps in the water. The person sounds badly injured, since it sounds like they must be limping. They step into the clearing and I see how serious it is. Their leg is twisted badly at an awkward angle, and they seem in extreme pain.

_Alexander O'Neil._

_**How did he break his leg? Maybe a little run in with another tribute? Ooooh, I want to know more.**_

_**Is it just me, or are my little twists and turns getting a bit, well, boring? It seems like that to me at least…**_

_**Well I love hearing back from you guys! Keep reviewing.(: Don't forget to add to alerts and favorites, or PM me any suggestions. Thanks!**_

_**Bye guys! BRO FIST!**_


	24. When Things Go Bump in the Night

**Chapter 24**

I let out an ear piercing scream and run for him. When I reach him, I see how exhausted he looks and I wonder how he got his leg so beat up. He collapses on my shoulder as I try to soothe him the best I can without any drugs. I think about carrying him up the hill myself, but decide since he's taller than me it wouldn't be very practical unless I sling him over my shoulder, which I think will hurt him even more.

Alexander is just dead weight, so I call the others to help me. When none of them move a muscle, I panic. "GET YOUR ASSES OVER HERE AND HELP ME!" Grey then rushes over to help me. I now realize that I saw Seth holding him back from helping me. Why?

"Here, let me take him," Grey says, and I load him onto his shoulders. At least Grey knows how to put him over his shoulder without causing Alexander pain. I look into Grey's eyes for the first time and see that they are a beautiful, sparkling shade of grey, probably why his parents named him that, and there is a certain kindness in them. Even if it shows for just a second, I know he wouldn't hurt a fly if he didn't have to. I think I only saw him take 1 kill. He shoots me an apologetic look, and then we head up the excuse of a hill they placed the Cornucopia on. It looks like I have _one _true ally in the career pack, other than Alexander of course. I just need to make sure that he would abandon them for me. Well, abandon them for me and Alexander.

When we get to the top of the Cornucopia I'm mad as hell. "What was that? Not helping me with Alexander? We're in a fricken alliance!"

Emerald just shrugs her shoulders and says, "Not my problem."

I slap her and shout, "ARE YOU PURPOSELY TRYING TO PISS ME OFF OR SOMETHING?" That was for the boy from District 8, Eloy. He had scars from an accident in one of the clothing factories or something, he deserved better than a spear to the heart.

She goes for a punch, but I catch her fist, twist her arm until it's behind her back, push her onto the Cornucopia face first, and press my knee roughly into her spine. "I didn't get a 12 for nothing," I whisper into her blonde hair.

"GUYS! HELP ME!" She screams, writhing under my grip.

Seth is about to go and help her, but Karina stops him by placing a hand on his arm and whispering, "Wait, I wanna see how this plays out." He reluctantly stops his charge. The unfaithful bastards. The lot of them.

Alexander gives a grunt of pain, so I release Emerald and turn my attentions toward him.

"Try anything and I _will _kill you," I say, directing my words towards Emerald who has been sneaking up on me as quietly as possible on a giant metal Cornucopia. Dumb girl, it's a good thing she's decent looking and knows how to fight.

She then collapses, all hopes of a kill drained from her. Looks like I won a few sponsors. I would have gotten even more if I broke a bone or just killed her, she's lucky I didn't.

From then on I tend to Alexander, getting the necessary supplies from around us. A splint made of wood from a nearby tree. Bandages from a first aid kit in the Cornucopia. By the time I'm done everyone else is digging into the giant mound of food courtesy of the Cornucopia. Alexander's shin bone has shattered, and swelled like a balloon. Not that simple to fix for an amateur.

An earth shattering cannon goes off 10 times. 10 dead in just a few hours. I try to stop myself from shivering. I probably knew them all. _Looks like those 3 that never came out through their doors killed their stylist too. So really, 13 dead… _The rest of the careers will pay for this. So will the Capitol. They all will pay. I'll see to it myself.

We gather up the supplies, put what we need into a backpack (one each), then string a net over everything we're not bringing to protect it. Finally, as Karina likes to call it, we go hunting. Our night is spent uneventful though, since our footsteps send ripples everywhere. Alexander is still unconscious and currently on Grey's back. There are tributes in the trees, barely illuminated by the torches we're carrying, but I pretend not to notice them. I won't be the one who rats them out. No more death. For now.

While hunting they show the faces of the dead tributes in the sky. 10 tributes dead in 1 day. Dalia and Magnar from 5. Jeremiah from 6. Infiniti from 7. Eloy and Heliodora from 8. Oxley from 9. Sakura from 10. Hidalgo and Kennedy from 11. The memory of each person leaves me weeping on the inside and a knife of guilt stabs me in the gut each time I think about them.

We go back to the Cornucopia and make camp there. A fire is sparked, and a night watch is set up. I'm up first.

Nothing happens really, except for when Chance and Doyle, the twins from 3, show up. I never learned much about them since they mostly talked to each other and babbled about some fancy electronic gadgets. They seemed to know how to operate everything the Capitol had to offer, and it had amazed me. Don't be too surprised by how much I know about them, I observed the other tributes as well. Occasionally the twins talked to me politely, but other than that nothing. They both look pretty beat up so when I see them at the edge of the forest, so I load up a backpack with first aid supplies, food, a short sword, and a long bladed knife. I casually walk to the edge of the trees and say aloud, "Wow, 2 people could live off of the stuff in this bag for a while if they _rationed it." _Then I walk away a couple of yards, pretend to do my business, and then walk back. The bag is gone and I smile for a second, remember I'm on camera, so I pretend to look baffled. When I just barely look by pushing through a couple of bushes I give up and walk back to camp. I hope I helped them.

After that I gratefully hand the watch over to Emerald.

"Don't even _think _about killing me in my sleep. I sleep lightly Emerald, and when I wake up before you slit my throat I will do much worse than slitting _your_ throat. We want to give them a show, don't we?"

She gulps, but then covers it up with a snort. Then she finds her way over to my lookout place. I fall asleep soon afterwards.

My sleep is plagued with the faces of those who were killed today. _Especially _Sakura. _My first kill… It was one of the hardest things I had ever done._

After a few hours, somebody comes close and covers my mouth before I can do anything. My attacker then pins me down flat on my back. _Looks like I'll be dying sooner than I had expected._

_**:O Who snuck up on Lily in the middle of the night? Will they kill her? Will she somehow get out of this? Is it Emerald?**_

_**Sorry for the wait guys, I was really tired yesterday. I somehow got sunburn on the first day of my vacation. Ugh.**_

_**Alright keep reviewing guys, I love getting the feedback from you guys.(: Add to your favorites, alerts, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye guys!**_


	25. Surrounded

**Chapter 25**

I begin to struggle, but my attacker then keeps my arms down with by pinning them down with their knees. _Maybe I should kick them… I can kick that high. _I definitely would have kicked them if they didn't whisper into my ear, "Please don't struggle, Lily. You'll wake the others."

My eyes widen. It's Grey. He's sitting on top of me, covering my mouth in the middle of the night like that is somehow normal. What is going on?

"I'm going to move my hand away now. Please don't scream." I nod, so he slowly removes his hand and he lets it hover, just in case I do begin to scream.

"Grey, what are you doing? It's the middle of the night!"

"Lily, before it's too late, I wanted you to know something."

"What might that be?"

"You can't trust anyone in these Games. All of the other Careers will stab you in the back the first chance you get. Alexander included."

"What?" I whisper furiously. Is he mad?

"I could treat you so much better than him if you just left him. I want to give you a choice, because I would never want to make you do something that you don't want to do."

"You bastard, thinking I would betray Alexander like that. Why would I betray him if I know he would never betray me?"

"Sorry…" He looks a bit disappointed. Kind of like a lot of those other guys back in my District when I rejected them. One boy who had broken into his father's liquor cabinet had tried to steal a kiss, so I broke his wrist. It's understandable that Grey would do this because he had an innocent crush on me. "I just thought he was like Seth…"

"He's nothing like Seth," Forgive and forget isn't my policy. Besides, he insulted Alexander. Seth is an _extremely _low comparison.

"I didn't know that. He never talked to me the entire time in training. He mostly talked to all of the girls in training, and he seemed like a jerk in the interviews. I'm sorry."

"Of course you didn't. And did you ever _try _to talk to _him?_ They probably talked to him first. I know that every girl back home liked him. I also know that every guy wanted me. Have you ever heard of a publicity stunt? Familiarize yourself, because that's what he was doing at the interviews. And apology accepted."

He shrugs my words off and says, "Just, please admit it. You don't truly love him, do you?"

I'm caught off guard by his question. "I- I don't know what I feel…" I stutter.

"That's all I needed to know."

Then he kisses me, full on the lips. My heart races, and my sanity shakes.

"I just wanted to do that once…" He says, and then returns to his duty as night watch.

_I didn't dislike it… I'm not sure if I liked it either… I'm not sure what I feel about that kiss. I guess it was okay. I'm not sure what I feel about anything right now…_

My life is so confusing… Boys only make it even more confusing… Ugh.

As I am falling asleep, I can't help but think, _Well, at least he wasn't that bad of a kisser…_ My sleep is uninterrupted from then on.

In the morning I tend to Alexander. He seems stronger, but I'm not sure if that's good or not. Some poisons work like that, make the infected person seem better, but kill them soon after. Then again, this isn't poison. Maybe he's just well rested.

"What happened?" I ask Alexander. He still hasn't said anything about how he broke his leg.

"The damn traps… One hit my leg, snapped the bone."

I am shocked. "What was powerful enough to snap your bone like a twig?"

"Giant clubs."

"Whoa. They had clubs in yours?"

"Yea. You mean, they didn't in yours?"

"None at all," I answer.

"Lucky."

"Not really. But I _did _have a huge mutt in mine while Percy was typing in his information to open the door."

He looks puzzled. "What do you mean, punching in his information?"

"He had to type in all this information about himself. It took forever."

"Victoria just had to say a password and get her hand scanned. It took 30 seconds tops." My face tells everything, so he tries to make me feel better by saying, "But a mutt? Damn, how did you guys deal with that?"

"I kind of pissed it off while Percy was unlocking the door."

Karina walks by and throws me a disapproving look, so I get annoyed. "Hey, make yourself useful and go make me a pile of wood and some first aid supplies."

"Pain killers wouldn't hurt right now too," Alexander says under his breath.

"I already mixed some into your food. They take half an hour to kick in," I whisper back to him with a smile. I had mashed up some peaches for his breakfast. He had loved them back when we were 7. I didn't know about now, but he ate them.

Karina just scowls at me, but eventually she goes off. With the wood she brings back I make a new splint and a crutch for Alexander. I take off his current bandaging, check to see how everything is going so far. No change. I guess the sleep he got helped with the energy difference. Besides, when I first saw him in the arena yesterday, he was exhausted from walking so far.

After everyone has breakfast the hunt begins. I scout ahead with Grey while I have Seth carry Alexander. Karina and Emerald are on either side of Seth.

"But he has a crutch! He can walk!" Seth had argued when I had wanted him to carry Alexander.

"Yea, I can walk Lily!" Alexander had agreed.

"But I want you to save your energy today. I don't want you to tire yourself out and collapse like yesterday."

He had just pouted and now he's strung on Seth's back. I do allow him to have short periods of walking, but I keep an eye on him and make sure he walks only 5 minutes out of 10. It seems strict, and he keeps complaining, but I know that he's grateful for not having to walk more.

"You can't tell me you didn't enjoy that kiss." Says Grey. This is going to be an awkward conversation.

"I can't say I disliked it either."

"Me neither," he admits guiltily.

"Look, Grey, I like you and everything but… Just not in that way. Can we be just friends?"

"Yea. I'd like that."

"I know we will always be a bit more than 'just friends.' We will always probably like each other but I…" I choke up, but I don't have to finish.

"It's okay, Lily. Like I said, I just wanted to do that once. Just that once…"

I smile and we stop talking as we enter a large round clearing. The water is shallow around here.

"YOU NEED A BREAK GUYS?" I shout back to the others.

"SURE! THERE'S NO GAME AROUND HERE ANYWAYS!" Karina shouts back. I hate how she refers to the other tributes as game.

I stand in the middle of the clearing, facing away from the path they are coming from. Grey is by my side the whole time as we watch the trees and water, waiting to see if someone will show themselves.

"GREY! GET OVER HERE!" Shouts Seth from behind us.

Grey walks over to them and a few minutes later I hear their footsteps again. But I don't notice what they are doing until it's too late. They've surrounded me.

_**Is the little kiss that Lily and Grey had just a sham? Is he just another jerk of a guy? Dun dun dunnnn. Maybe she'll die NOW. Who knows? Well, I do but you guys really don't…**_

_**Alright so thanks for the reviews guys! Keep reviewing, add to your favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions.**_


	26. Another One Bites the Dust

**Chapter 26**

"What the…" I begin to say, but stop myself. "Joke's over guys, I'm tired so let's take a break."

"No, we'll take a break after you're dead!" Seth almost shouts in his excitement as he lunges at me with an ax. I should have expected this. I should have guessed that they were going to betray me.

I easily sidestep him and trip him. I then mimic myself from the first day of training. "I… I have _no _idea…" Then I give a snort of laughter. "Of course I knew how, dumbass." That sure gets him mad as hell. I surpassed that level of anger a while ago.

Karina makes a leap of faith towards me and I don't hear it since Seth is splashing like a fish out of water. It looks like one of Esther or Aaron's tantrums.

"NOOOO!" shouts Grey, jumping out and throwing Karina off balance and sending her sprawling.

"Whose side are you on, Grey?" Emerald snarls.

"Ours, or hers?"

"Alexander? You're with _them_?" I almost sob, but he just ignores me. _Looks like **someone **is single… _How can I think of something like that right now? Focus…

Instead of saying anything, Grey just steps by my side for an answer.

"Thanks," I whisper to him.

"I always help those who deserve it," he answers with a wink.

I unsheathe 2 long knives that were hidden from around my waist and get into a ready position.

"YOU GUYS WANNA DANCE? LET'S DANCE!" I shout tauntingly. This ought to be good.

Grey and I fight back to back, and we are doing extremely well. By the time they back off, they all have been wounded. None too severely. I don't aim to kill. I aim to make it hurt like hell.

We relax as they walk into the woods. Grey slumps to the ground, completely exhausted. He got hit too. As I tend to his wounds, he closes his eyes in bliss.

Then, an arrow flies from one of the trees, burrowing deep into his throat.

I whip around as his life stains the water around my feet red. It looks like they didn't leave after all.

"YOU'RE NEXT!" Karina shrieks, pointing at me wickedly.

I don't move as they surround me once more. I only hold Grey's hand as he dies. When his hand goes limp and his eyes are unseeing, I place my fingers on his eyelids to close his eyes, then rise to my feet and adjust my knives to a more comfortable grip. A murderous grip.

I regard them all coldly. Their bows are strung on their backs while their short distance weapons are out. Karina a short sword, Emerald a mace, Seth an ax, and Alexander is leaning on a trident and looking a bit pale.

I fix my gaze on Alexander and feign vomiting, since it's clear he's working hard not to. That _and _I am disgusted by him. "Sorry," I say. "I saw that ugly faces of yours and couldn't help it."

He goes to make a comeback but turns paler as another wave of nausea hits him.

I then turn my attentions to Seth. "So, Seth." I begin casually. "When exactly were you planning on telling Karina that you're crushing on her?"

He turns beet red as Karina whips around to gawk at him.

"Don't think I forgot about you," I say to Emerald.

I pounce on her, throw her mace to the side, and use the hilt of my knife to knock her out cold.

I then jump up and take everyone else out, mixing a bit of martial arts in for good measure. My neighbor taught me when I was 12 after hearing my screams from when my father beat me. Maybe the Capitol likes martial arts. Well, that and maybe girls that look decent who can also kick ass.

After I knock out Seth, I kiss Grey's cold body goodbye, and kick Alexander where it counts. Well, more like stomp, which makes him groan and then fall back into unconsciousness. Then I run like hell. But not before Emerald gets up and lets loose another arrow, and it lodges deep into my knee tendon.

Looks like I didn't hit her as hard as I thought I did.

**_:o Oh snap, she did not just go there. I'm such a freak for saying that… Oh well._**

**_Kind of short, I know. I'm sorry.):_**

**_Review, add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions. Thanks!_**

**_Bye guys! BRO FIST._**


	27. Escape

**Chapter 27**

The pain in my knee is excruciating, and my vision becomes blurred. _Like Olus said, I'm a tough nut to crack. Keep going Lily._ I keep running, running, trying to get away but I am going extremely slow. Another arrow wizzes by my head, so I find a rock, turn around, and throw it. It hits Emerald right in the head and leaves her a bit bloodied and knocked unconscious once more.

I relax a bit, but not by much. I have to get away from them. I need to treat this wound. _Crap, _I think. _I don't have any supplies._ I turn back around and weave my way around the pack of unconscious bodies. I find my way to the Cornucopia by running, but I lose a _lot _of blood on the way. I bandage it up at the Cornucopia after I pull the arrow out, so they can't follow me any farther than that when they wake up. I load up 2 packs with everything I will need, swallow a few painkillers, and then run in the opposite direction from the way I came.

The pain doesn't subdue, even after the 30 minute wait, so when I come across some leaves by the roots of a tree, I don't hesitate to chew them. I remember them from training, and from my childhood. They take away pain. _I'm so tired. Just a little nap wouldn't hurt…_ Who am I kidding, it would hurt me. I don't have time to take a nap; the Careers are going to be on my trail the second they wake up.

I hear a giant roar from the other side of the arena. Seth has woken up.

I take off running again. Normally, I'm twice the speed of an average person. Now I'm just average, and it annoys me. I never stop running though, my endurance didn't go down. I ignore the searing pain as the wound opens again, and I keep running and find myself at the only unmarked door.

"What the hell. I'm going to die from the Careers if I stay in here anyways, I might as well throw them off my scent."

I turn the knob and the door swings open silently. It reveals a long corridor that widens out near the end. I close the silent door behind me, and run for it. When I reach the end, at first the sun blinds me temporarily, but I adjust and get a chance to see where I am.

The ruins of District 13.

_**How do you like my arena? I gave you guys a hint at the plants section in training. It's just that it was kind of confusing…**_

_**Ugh, even shorter chapter. I'm sorry guys.)': **_

_**Reviews make me happy; don't you guys want to make me happy? Please?): LOL. Alright so add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions. Thanks!**_

_**Bye guys! CHAIR MODE: ACTIVATED. BOOP.**_


	28. Trust

**Chapter 28**

I hear a boy scream, "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!"

The voice sounds familiar, but I don't have any time to remember who it belongs to. I get my knives out and run, the sound of the person's screams guiding me along.

I go through a forest of dead trees, and come across a clearing. _Oh no, not one of these again. _I think. Last time I came across a clearing I got ambushed and my only ally died.

In the clearing there stands a mutt, and it looks like it's made completely out of dead animal parts stitched together. It has a deer carcass over its stomach, bear fur over its face, and most disturbingly, something that looks like a human skin over the area where its heart _should _be. I'm _so _glad that I have a strong stomach.

The mutt has backed Rhett into a tree, and it looks like it doesn't plan on letting him go anytime soon. _So I had been hearing __**Rhett's **__screams. No wonder the voice sounded familiar._

"HEY FUR FACE!" I shout. Neither the mutt nor Rhett has spotted me yet, so I step into the clearing for them to get a closer look.

"LILY, I'M HOPING THAT YOU DON'T MEAN ME!" Rhett shouts jokingly, but his voice trembles.

I pretend to take a closer look at him by squinting and shout back, "I DON'T SEE A BEARD OR MUSTACHE YET!"

He laughs, and I'm glad I've taken his mind off of the mutt. Even if it was only for a second.

I have the full attention of the mutt now, and Rhett is able to slip away.

"ANY WEAKNESSES?" I shout to Rhett. I need to know how to take this thing down.

"NOT THAT I KNOW OF!" He shouts back.

"HAVE YOU FOUGHT IT YET?"

"NO. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE SEEN THIS THING!"

"GOOD. THAT MEANS THERE MIGHT BE SOMETHING." I switch my knives for a spear from one of the packs. I loaded one bag up with weapons and medical supplies. The other one is filled with shelter, food, and water.

The beast lunges at me, and I go at my fastest speed while injured. My knee hurts, badly. I falter as it almost collapses under me when I'm going for the forelegs of the beast. I fall flat on my backside and think, _I'm dead either way. I don't like these options._

When I fall though, I fall out of the beast's line of sight. Its eyes are on top of its head, like a horse's, so it can't see me when I'm on the ground. _Just don't step on me._

The beast is extremely tall, even if it stands on 4 legs, so I can easily walk under it and look for something. There, that's where the heart is, right under the human skin. Just as I'd observed earlier. I stand directly underneath the human skin, and jab upwards. Hopefully, I've just punctured its heart. I run from underneath the beast, partly to escape the shower of blood, partly to prevent myself from being crushed.

The beast bleeds, but doesn't fall. "SHIT!" I yell. It turns around and fixes its eyes on me as if saying, '_You did this, didn't you?_'

Before it can charge me, I go underneath it again, twist the spear, and then drag it along the soft underbelly. _The skin of this thing looks rough, but it cuts like butter._

I reach the end of the creature's flesh, but I keep running. Not 2 seconds after I get out of there, the beast tilts its head, confused, and then collapses. It twitches a couple of times on the ground, then lies still.

I am covered in the creature's blood, and my bandage is soaked through with my own blood. I throw my spear to the side, and faint from exhaustion.

When I wake up I'm clean of blood and my bandage is changed. I also feel rested, no longer exhausted or even a bit tired.

"Before you go thinking 'Pervert!' or anything, I just wanted to let you know that to get that blood off of you I only removed the jumpsuit and soaked you in water. I cleaned that too and put it back on you. I also noticed that nasty cut on your knees, so I cleaned and changed the dressing." Says Rhett when he notices I'm awake. I hadn't noticed him yet.

"Oh… Okay, thanks. And by the way, I wouldn't have cared if you saw me that way. It doesn't matter to me."

"Well, I wouldn't have done that anyways. Even with your permission, I would feel like I was taking advantage of you."

"Aw, that's sweet. Any jerk of a guy back home would have died to see me like that. They don't care if they take advantage of me or not."

"But you wouldn't have let them get that close, right?" He questions, raising an eyebrow.

"Heck no. I'm not a slut. You just seem like a guy I could trust, that's why I wouldn't care if you saw me."

"Sweet, the friend-zone is just about my favorite zone."

"You haven't gotten to that point. _Yet…"_ I say with a wicked smiling.

He just smiles back and I notice how we're under the stars.

"I have a tent in one of the bags if you want."

"Nah, I like sleeping under the stars. If you want I'll pitch the tent, but I'll stay out here unless it starts raining. I still might stay out here if it's raining so you don't have to deal with me in the tent. I want you to stay comfortable."

"That's really nice of you, but I just thought you might get cold or something, staying out in the open. I'm fine like this. It's actually how I slept for a while back then." Back then, when I had to take care of 70 other children. When Alexander's love and hospitality were true.

"I don't get cold very often. Besides, I got a pack too. It had some food, water, blankets, sleeping bag, stuff like that."

"Must have been one pretty big backpack," I say.

"Same size as each of yours."

"Wait, how did you get your pack?" I don't know anyone who would have given someone outside of the alliance a pack.

"I found the pack out here, on the highest branch of one of those trees. It was pretty well camouflaged."

"Oh, that makes sense." First person out here gets the extra supplies. Smart.

"Yea."

After that I wiggle my way up to a sitting position, but when I try to stand I collapse.

"Take it easy there, Lily. There's no need to rush getting better. Standing is beyond you with a knee like that, I have no idea how you were able to run earlier."

"Adrenaline," I answer, my voice strained from trying not to shout in pain. I guess I just now realized how badly injured I am.

He just shrugs and gets me relaxed enough to settle back down into the sleeping bag. "Wake me up when it's morning," I say with a yawn and he just nods.

I wake up at dawn the next morning. _Looks like there is no need for Rhett to be an alarm clock for me._ I look around the small camp and Rhett isn't anywhere in sight. My stealthier side kicks in and I get up. I'm amazed by how an emergency and some adrenaline can get a person going. Even if they _are _injured.

I go running around the surrounding forest, but I go along silently and move in such a way that I would blend into the background for unwanted watchers. After about an hour of doing so, the adrenaline starts to leave my system, so I have to weave my way back to camp. When I come back the smell of fish cooking fills the air.

I freeze, all of a sudden scared half to death of anyone there. Rhett took my knives out of my belt, and kept them in a backpack. I am unarmed against the probably dangerous intruder.

_**Oh me oh my, who is this new guy? Just kidding, it may not be a guy. But then again, it might be… Have the Careers finally caught up with Lily, looking for revenge? Do they already have Rhett?**_

_**The best thing about being a writer is torturing you guys by asking important questions that you will probably want to know the answers to…**_

_**Reviews make me happy, so please do review.(: Also add to alerts and favorites, and PM me any suggestions you might have. I would love to add in a few more twists and turns to this story.(; I'm always up for that sort of thing.**_

_**Bye! Don't be barrels.(;**_


	29. Confessing to a Kill

**Chapter 29**

The person in the camp is obscured from my line of vision, so I try to stay hidden. I get behind a tree and try to get a good look at the person. Looks like the boy from District 7, Blackburn. _I can handle this. He seemed friendly enough when I was waiting to be called for the private sessions._

I step out into the camp in plain sight and say, "Oh, hi Blackburn. What are you doing here?"

He seems surprised by my appearance but answers, "Well I found this camp here and decided to take advantage of it by cooking this fish that I caught by the stream."

"Ah, that was _really _smart of you," I purr as I get a bit closer. Flirting never hurts.

He blushes and says, "Well… I'm guessing this is your camp, so I should probably go."

"Wait," I say before he leaves. "Did you happen to see Rhett?" I might as well ask. If he didn't attack me when he first saw me then it probably means that he doesn't want to kill. Well there's that, the possibility he's unarmed, or he thinks that I'm armed. He must remember my 12.

"No," he says with a confused look on his face. He probably doesn't even know who Rhett is.

"Oh, okay. Thanks anyways."

He nods and walks off. While his back is turned I silently pick up a bow and a sheath of arrows. "Wait!" I say again before he gets too far.

"What?" He's a bit annoyed now. Then he turns around and sees my knocked arrow aimed straight at him.

"Would you mind handing my knife set back, please?"

He gulps and puts the knife set down. Then he backs away slowly, as if I would actually shoot him.

"Wait!" Third time saying it, and it must get on his nerves.

"What?" He says through gritted teeth as he turns around.

"I can't send you out there unarmed. You'll die. Here," I say, tossing an ax near his feet.

He looks at me surprised, but doesn't question it. He doesn't want me to change my mind and take it back. Even if he does charge me, I'm still probably faster than him. He picks up the ax and picks up the pace a bit, not wanting me to hit him in the back or anything.

When he is far out of sight I make sure that everything else is still here, and then run around again. I need to find Rhett. I hear the gurgling of a stream and run for it. I go so fast and I'm so preoccupied that I run straight into somebody.

"Lily, you're not supposed to be running around like that."

"Blackburn… At camp… Gone now... Not alone out here…" I somehow manage to croak out as I gasp for air.

He just pulls a face and says, "Of course someone else is out here. You couldn't have expected us to be the only ones who figured out about the door."

"No. I'm not worried about Blackburn out here. If he figured out how to get here, then the others will too."

"So?"

"The others. The _Careers._"

A look of realization dawns on him and it is soon replaced by fear. He quickly covers it though, probably more for my sake than his.

"You know, you don't have to protect me from the dangers of the world. I know it's an evil place already. I've experienced the evils firsthand," I say quietly. He obviously didn't want to worry me by looking scared in front of me.

"I know, I just…" He can't come up with a good excuse other than he probably wanted to protect me, like I said.

"It's sweet that you wanted to protect me, but that isn't necessary. I'm not like other girls who expect pampering, and who expect others to take care of them. I like to take care of myself. I trust other people, and then they show me why I shouldn't."

"Oh…" He says uncomfortably. "Well, why are the Careers after you? I don't think you've told me yet."

"Changing the subject? Alright, I'll let it slide. Well they betrayed me, and Alexander is among them. I don't know what I really did to piss them off, but they were unfaithful from the beginning. By the way, Alexander got his shin bone shattered from a club in his hell hole. I just wish that I had been the one to make that happen."

He smiles shyly, and then says, "A betrayal in an alliance? Already? I thought that those would come up later on. And shattering his shin bone? From what you've told me, he deserved it."

"Yea, already. And he does deserve it. Oh, and they also killed Grey. He had been the only one in the Career pack to be on my side."

"Grey? Really? Wow. And why _do _you guys call yourselves the Careers?"

"Karina decided on it. She thought that since 1, 2, and 4 were so much stronger than the other Districts, we should get to name our alliance. She decided on the Careers because she thought that since we were all such good fighters, we could kill and fight as a living."

"That's… Creative."

"Yea, but I came up with the 'pack' part. We are like a wolf pack, since that's how we had always moved, in a pack. But Karina had come up with the terms 'hunting' and 'game'. When the Careers go looking for victims she calls it hunting, and she had always referred to the other tributes as game. It had annoyed me so much."

His mouth forms a silent 'O' and he stops questioning me.

"Are you hungry?" I finally ask, breaking the silence.

"A little."

"I'm going to go hunting."

"Oh no you're not. We have food right at camp, why not eat it instead?"

"Didn't you notice? I only have nonperishables in there. They will last for a long time. But they will run out pretty fast if we're both eating them. We need to look for food. If you won't let me at least go hunting for fresh meat can you at least help me find some plants to eat or something?"

He sighs when he realizes that I'm right, and puts my arm over his shoulder to support me.

Every once in a while I lean down to inspect a plant and pluck it if it's safe, if not I just leave it alone. "Now this all makes sense. In training, the plants _did _give me a hint as to where we were going. The plants there grew in either wetlands, like inside, or in extremely rough conditions, like the barren wasteland we're in now. Otherwise known as, the ruins of District 13."

"I never stopped by the plants station except for that time when I apologized to you. I have no idea about any of these."

I smile and say, "That's alright. I'll give you a crash course."

After that I narrate myself, announcing the name of each plant and saying if it's safe or not. After the sack Rhett brought is full, we head back to camp. I make sure nobody is there, and then check to see all of our supplies are still there. We couldn't carry _all _of them.

"We need to move camp. Now." My voice is filled with panic now.

"Why?"

"One of the spears is missing. That, and a bag of dried fruit."

"Shit." He mumbles under his breath, and then we get to work. Our stuff is packed up within 10 minutes and then we're done. Rhett's stuff is in his bag, and I returned all of the other stuff to their proper places. We carry one backpack each, and alternate carrying the last bag. Rhett had insisted on carrying it, but it's full of weapons so of course it's heavy. In the beginning he had been reluctant to let me take it, but now after 3 hours of walking he's grateful for the load off his shoulders when it's my turn to take the bag.

"So," I begin. "Was there anything going on between you and Lavender, or anyone else for that matter?"

"No, why do you ask?"

Just then a cannon goes off twice, and the bodies of the twins from 3 are lifted away by a hover plane. Yesterday after we had gotten back from hunting, the bodies had disappeared from the area and I had wondered what had happened. There's my answer.

"RUN!" I shout. Someone's close, and they're armed. It's hard to tell from such a long distance, but I think I can see the blood dripping from their still bodies.

Rhett and I crash through the forest, and we make a lot of noise. We hear footsteps getting closer and closer, and I don't think that I can run for very much longer. My wound has opened yet again, and it hurts more than last time.

We come across a tree taller than all of the others, so I begin to climb out of pure instinct. I am weighed down by both backpacks on my back, but I somehow manage to go as far as I dare, stopping when the branches don't seem likely to hold my weight. Rhett doesn't follow me though.

"RHETT! YOU HAVE TO CLIMB UP HERE!"

"I'M SORRY LILY, BUT I CAN'T!"

"OF COURSE YOU CAN!"

"NO, I CAN'T. I CAN'T CLIMB, AND I'M AFRAID OF HEIGHTS."

I take off both of my bags and hang them on a branch above my head. I scramble down the tree, and I hear the footsteps getting closer by the second. "Please, Rhett. Get on my back and I'll help you get up there." I need to protect him. He's helped me so much, and I just can't stand the thought of losing him.

He looks surprised by me coming back down to get him, but shakes his head. "No, I don't think you're strong enough to get both of us back up there. Save yourself Lily. Please."

"NO! Please, just listen. I'm not leaving you down here to die. I won't let that happen. Just trust me, please Rhett." My voice gets frantic. The footsteps are no more than 100 meters away.

"Lily, you have to leave. Just please, I'm not worth it. Your life is more precious than mine, anyways. My life is worth nothing to anybody."

_A life, worth nothing? He sounds like the Gamemakers. I can't leave him here, I care for him too much._ "Rhett, your life is not worth nothing. Just please, you have to live."

"Give me one good reason."

Something finally clicks in my mind, and it all makes sense. "Rhett, do you believe in love at first sight?"

My question catches him off guard but he answers, "Yes."

"The first time I saw you, I had been dreaming. You had said something about bringing me back home, to my family. I understand that now. My visions are usually of my past, but that dream had somehow shown me the boy I would come to love. I saw you in the Reaping videos, and it was incredible. Who would've known I would be facing the boy that I love? Whenever I was with Alexander, I had a feeling of uneasiness, like that wasn't how it was supposed to be. I suppressed it, and now I know what it meant. I didn't love him. I have extremely strong feelings for you. I might even truly love _you._"

With that, I pull him into a hug and everything truly does make sense. With Alexander, I had wanted it to seem like everything made sense so bad, that my mind let me think that it did. Now there are no illusions, and I know that I don't need to kiss Rhett. Nothing needs to be forced. There is no need to rush anything, like I did with Alexander.

"That was a long reason. And it took you just about forever to figure it out," he says, lifting me up and spinning me in the air.

I laugh and smile, until I hear the footsteps again. 50 meters, if that. "Put me down, we need to get up that tree."

He nods and puts me down, so I let him get onto my back and I start climbing. It takes a lot longer than last time, but I don't stop. I use my last bit of strength to hoist us both onto the branch, and we're just in time. Literally 2 seconds after I've hoisted us up, Giselle runs in. She's from District 6. She spots us and smiles wickedly. She's holding the spear. Correction: the spear she stole from our campsite. It's covered in the crimson blood of Chance and Doyle.

Rhett and I settle onto the branch while Giselle just watches, and I reach for my packs. I get a bow and a quiver of arrows, and then nock an arrow. "Hey, there Giselle. What are you doing here?"

"Oh, nothing much. Just thought I'd check out the scenery around here. Thanks for the spear, by the way."

Rhett shoots me a look like 'How could we leave the campsite unattended so often?' I just shrug at him then shout back down. "No problem. It's looking pretty heavy there, why don't you put it down?"

"Nah, I'm stronger than I look." She begins to advance towards the tree, so I pull back the string.

"You don't want to do this, Giselle."

"I don't what to do what? I don't want to win? Of course I want to win, Lily."

"You're giving me no choice here, Giselle."

"You always have a choice," she says, still advancing towards the trunk of the tree.

I release the arrow, and it hits her right in the throat. I remember the image of Sakura yesterday, falling at my hands, at my arrow. "I'm sorry," I whisper, leaning my head against the trunk of the tree. A cannon goes off, and I know that she is dead. "I've had 2 kills so far, Rhett. I'm a murderer."

"You were only doing what you had to, to survive. Besides, the Capitol is behind all of this, pulling all of the strings. Technically, everyone is dead because of them, not you. You can't blame yourself for what they did, Lily. What they're making you do."

"But I didn't have to kill them. I could've just let them kill me, I could've just died instead of killing. There is no excuse for ever taking the life of someone else, Rhett."

He stays silent, and I fall asleep. I'm so tired now. Sure, the climbing was gruesome, but I can handle it. That's not what drained all of my energy just now.

Killing is what drained my energy, because it is the single most difficult thing I have ever had to do.

_**I know what you guys are thinking, 'She killed without much hesitation, how can she say that it's hard?' Well she's doing things out of instinct, trying to stay alive, as is the human nature. Some people have the will to live, and they will do things like that to achieve it. Those were my wise words of the day, maybe for the month. Who knows?**_

_**Don't forget to review, I love reviews. They make me so happy.(: Add to your favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions you might have about the story.**_

_**Bye!**_


	30. Reach For It

**Chapter 30**

Rhett and I set up camp by the stream and decide to not use the tent. At a moment's notice it would take too long to pack up, so we settle for just sleeping bags and the packs hidden up in a tree and camouflaged. We decide that we will tell each other if we are leaving camp for a little while to make sure at least one person is always present to defend, and we also set up a night watch. We don't want to be killed in our sleep.

I am cleaning my wound in the stream when another cannon goes off. I tally up the dead. So far 14 tributes are down. 10 players left in action. Wonderful.

"14 dead and it's only day 3," says Rhett from camp.

"Yea. Did you know any of the other tributes that died?" I limp back to camp and settle down next to him.

"Not really. Did you?"

"Every last one of them. They had families Rhett. Families that cared and would have protected them from every harm if they could have. They didn't deserve this."

"Nobody deserves this, Lily. Death at such a young age."

"Do you want to know the worst part about these Games so far, Rhett?"

"What?"

"I killed a 13 year old little girl yesterday. You should have seen the look on her face. She had just been scared Rhett. Scared of death, and I still killed her."

"Lily…"

"No, don't try to make it sound like killing a little girl is all right Rhett. Because it's not. None of this is okay." I'm freaking out now, and it's not pretty.

"Okay, then I won't say that it's okay. It's horrible that you had to kill, horrible for you to have ended a life when they were so young. None of this is either okay, fair, or even humane. When you are put into a situation like this, where you have to kill other children, then there's no way to stay humane. None of us would still be alive this far into the Games if we were humane."

I stay silent at his words because they are absolutely correct. I'm no longer humane. I can act like it, but I will never be that way again. My family's innocent little Lily Pad has grown up to be a monster, a murderer, a cruel, cruel, killer.

"Rhett?"

"Yea?"

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"Seeing this for what it really is."

"No problem, Lily." He blushes slightly, and it stands out on his barely tanned skin. He notices it and tries to hide it by turning away and rearranging his already neat pack.

"No, don't try and hide it. You look cute when you blush." I limp to the other side of him where he is now faced and put my hands on his shoulders so we are looking right into each other's eyes. I smile and he does too, but he also tries to redirect his gaze.

"Well, we should probably do something to kill this time we've got on our hands."

"We don't have any rocks around here, sorry."

He smiles as I bring up the conversation at the interviews once again.

"You do know it's a figure of speech, right?"

"Killing time is; I know that. I just didn't know that killing it with a rock is one as well."

He pouts as I smart mouth him, and I just smile even brighter.

I finally realize that my hands are still on his shoulders, and I pull away. "So, um… What kind of stuff did you have in your hell hole?" I make a weak attempt at changing the subject as I limp to a spot directly across from Rhett.

"Well I had things like pickaxes, avalanches, stuff like that. What did you have in yours?"

"Well let's see… Cannons, shruikens flying out of the walls, landmines, oh yea and a giant indestructible mutt."

He whistles and says, "Damn…"

"Yeaa, it kind of sucked."

"Kind of?"

"Okay, _really _sucked."

"That makes more sense."

"We should probably start moving camp every day. I'm guessing Chance and Doyle were following me since I gave them a pack of supplies on the first night, so I wasn't very hard to track. Maybe we should break camp before dawn and move out."

"We won't have very much sleep then," Rhett points out.

"I'm an insomniac anyways. If you want more sleep then I can take most of the watch, if not then we can split it up equally and probably live longer."

"I'm fine with less sleep."

"Alright, then we are good to go with this."

"Yea, I'll be prepped and ready to go."

"Great."

"So, what do we do until then?"

"Look for food."

We spend the rest of the day alternating roles. At all times one of us is either guarding the camp or out looking for food. The only meat anywhere around here is genetically enhanced animals, probably planted here by the Capitol so we can at least have some fresh meat. _How thoughtful, _I think sarcastically.

By the time night falls we have a pretty large collection of food. Other than the nonperishables I got from the Cornucopia we have a baby deer (I only shot it because it was crippled, it wouldn't have stood a chance against any natural predator), 2 ducks, and about 5 fish. At least the fish are plentiful. We also have a wide assortment of roots, nuts, berries, and some helpful herbs.

"I'll take first watch. You get some sleep," I say to Rhett. He looks exhausted from today. He also looks tanner than before.

"Okay," he says sleepily. He's far too tired to argue with me right now, and we both know it.

While he's sleeping, the face of the girl from 9 shines in the sky. _Malori…_

I take the first 2 shifts since I don't have the heart to wake him any earlier than that. He looks so peaceful when he sleeps. Nothing like how I probably look right now. I probably look nervous, sleep deprived, jittery, and ready to kill someone. To sum it up, I probably look like hell.

I climb down from the tree where I was on watch. "Wake up," I finally whisper into his ear once I decide that I should probably get some sleep too.

He opens his eyes and looks at the position of the moon in the sky. "You were supposed to wake me up for my watch a while ago," he says groggily, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Lost track of time," I say with a shrug and a smile.

I crawl into a sleeping bag and fall asleep immediately. It looks like I was more tired than I thought.

Rhett wakes me up once he has taken 2 shifts as revenge for me doing the same, and we pack up camp. "What direction do we head in?" I ask.

"Do you even know where you're going?"

I take up an offended look. "Yes, I very much do know where I am going. I'm going forward."

"Nice job. That helps a lot," he says with a laugh, pulling a compass out of his pack.

"Thanks for your faith in me," I mumble, pulling a compass out of my pocket as well.

He gives a shrug and reads his compass. "Which direction do you want to go?"

"I know how to read a compass, Rhett. When we decide on which direction to go in, I will know which way to go too, you know. And yes, we are going to decide together. If we run into something bad and I am the one who had decided which way to go then you're probably going to blame it on me."

"What happened to that reason you got me up the tree? You know, the one where we went all soft on each other?"

"I like you and everything, but I'm not going to rush into another relationship blind again. The last time I did that the person tried to get me killed."

He gives another shrug, "So, which direction?"

"East. That's where the sun rises, so I don't even need a compass to find it."

"Alright, fine by me. There, that was a decision made together, so I won't blame you later on."

"You better not," I say with a smile.

"Man, I could really use some of that reasoning again."

"Tell you what, you can put your sleeping bag next to mine tonight if you aren't _too _annoying today. We'll just do night watch from there, it shouldn't make too much of a difference."

"Some reward."

"Would you rather sit up in a tree during watch than sit in a sleeping bag next to mine?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

"Danger zone. Danger zone. All units get out of there immediately."

"Good choice," I say, taking his arm and putting it around my shoulder. He never would have if I hadn't.

"So, is that backpack getting heavy yet?"

"Rhett asks stupidly once I have let him put his arm around me." I narrate.

"Yea, that pretty much sums it up."

I roll my eyes but otherwise we keep walking, trying to reach the place where the sun will soon rise.

_**Ending with a not so romantic yet still somehow romantic scene. I know; I'm such a genius. Not… *Cough* What?**_

_**Review, add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions.(: Thanks!**_

_**Bye!**_


	31. Cold

**Chapter 31**

We make camp about an hour more of walking. I'm pretty sure that Rhett can't take much more walking, and I wouldn't mind stopping either. My knee seems like it will never heal. It was a pretty long trek, and the Gamemakers were fooling around with the weather. It was scorching hot throughout the night, and now it's freezing.

The tent is now up and we've got the sleeping bags out. They reflect body heat, so we should be good if it is below freezing. That will probably be pretty soon.

"Hey, Rhett, I'm going to get a fire going. I remember the instructor telling me a way I could rig it so there is no smoke. Something about attending to it carefully and all."

"Okay. I wouldn't care if there even was any smoke. I'm too cold to refuse a fire right now."

I smile and go to scour the area looking for enough firewood to last the day. Along the way I find some mint and jasmine. I could boil water and add these in, to make it similar to a tea. I shrug. At least it will be warm.

When I get back to camp I see that Rhett is fighting off sleep, so I just smile and move him silently into a sleeping bag, hoping I won't wake him. I get him near the fire to keep him warm, but close enough not to be uncomfortably warm or to burn him. I boil the water to make tea and tend to the fire, working hard to not make any smoke.

When the tea is ready I wake Rhett and hand him a cup of the hot drink. "What is it?"

"Jasmine tea with mint."

"Good, I'm not allergic. Thanks," he says drinking heavily.

"No problem," I say, taking a long sip from my own cup. It tastes bitter, but at least it's warm. _I never got used to the taste of tea._

"So, what is our goal for today?"

"The goal has already been achieved," I say, crawling into my sleeping bag.

"What was the goal?"

"To stay warm."

"Sounds good to me."

That day all we do is stay at camp, huddling to stay warm. Eventually I let Rhett put his arm around me, but I tell him it's only to stay warm. He knows it's more than that though, because of what I had said in that tree before. We both know how we feel about each other, have known even since then. The thing is that we're both too stubborn to completely admit it. We grow together, as I suspect most people would when they're freezing cold in a fight to the death. It is a painstakingly slow process that I would love to speed up, but I always remember how badly hurt I got the last time I rushed things. If I am going to die soon, then as long as I'm with Rhett, I would die happy.

We wake up to a splashing sound the next morning. We hadn't set up a watch the previous night, and I silently curse myself. How could I have been so careless? I'm just lucky we survived through the night.

"Morning beautiful," says Rhett sleepily next to me, stretching and yawning.

"I probably look like a mutt right now, so shut up."

"You have that certain glow that the sun has to your skin, and your hair is gleaming like the silver moon." It sounds like a poem. I know it may be a bit cheesy, but I am the type of girl that loves cheesy things.

I blush at the comparison, smile, and say, "We have to get moving. We lost a lot of time since we didn't get an early start."

"Alright. I'll pack up the supplies; you just sit there and look pretty."

"I'll pass. I think I'll keep watch, obliterate all traces of our being here, and get some water."

"Or that," he says with a shrug, as if he was serious.

I smile and I carefully discard of the burnt up logs, and then bury our fire pit so it looks just like it had been undisturbed. I then take a branch and sweep it over the camp once Rhett has finished, so it just looks a little windswept.

"Done yet?" Asks Rhett for just about the hundredth time.

"No, and it's going to be a no for the next 20 times as well. I still need to get the water."

He just pretends to give me a disapproving look and I go to fill our water bottles. We are going to need it later on. We haven't broken into our food and bottled water supplies yet, we are basically living off of the land right now. We have both agreed that the supplies from the Capitol are for emergencies only.

I go to a nearby stream and the splashing that had originally woken me gets louder as I near it. I get to the stream and just see a bunch of oversized fish jumping in and out of the water. I smile and go to fill my bottle of water, turning my head to watch Rhett to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

"Ow!" I shout, pulling my hand away from the water. Rhett looks, but I wave any worries he might have away, so he just keeps watch from where our former camp was. Something must have bitten me or something while I wasn't looking, because my hand is scratched. It looks like it only grazed my hand though, since the cuts aren't deep. I look around and only see the fish that I had seen earlier. They look like river trout, I think. I don't really find river fish very much back home, seeing as most of our fish are saltwater as opposed to freshwater.

I go to fill my bottle again, concluding that I must have scraped my hand on a rock since there are only the trout around. This time I glimpse one of the trout swim up to my hand extremely fast, and I, thinking that it's a harmless fish, keep my hand in the water to fill the bottle. I see the fish bite into my flesh, and I also see the inside of its mouth. It's lined with several rows of razor sharp teeth, and they are oozing something. I take a knife out with my free hand as I try not to shout in pain again, and try to stab the fish. I only make contact with scales though, and I can't penetrate them. They must be made of some type of armor, similar to a turtle's shell maybe. The fish keeps biting, holding on to my hand, so I panic and start to try to shake it off. Of course that doesn't help and its grip just tightens. There is a searing pain in the bite, and I start to feel woozy.

"LILY?" Shouts Rhett, he must have noticed something was up.

I turn around, swaying, and he must see the fish-mutt biting into my hand. He runs for me, but not before all of the other fish jump out of the water and onto my weak form. My energy is quickly depleting, and I can feel my heartbeat slowing down fast. _That's what was dripping from their teeth… Poison… Poison!_

"Rhett! Stay back, they're poisonous…" My voice comes out as a hoarse cry, but he pays no attention to my warning. Either he didn't hear me, or he didn't care.

"Rhett! I said-"

"I heard what you said, but I'm not going to let them kill you!" At least he cares.

"But, you could get yourself killed." My voice is nothing more than an inaudible whisper, and Rhett hunches over me with a jagged blade, trying to get the fish off of my barely moving form. He's thrashing, trying to throw them off of me, but I know it's hopeless. I close my eyes as he uselessly tries to pry the fish off of me. They have a death grip on me, and they're not going to let go until I'm dead. A cannon goes off, and the fish jump back into the water. _So, I must be dead._

_**Wow… How many mutts does the Capitol friggen have? :p I wonder how they make mutts in the first place… Sorry, random question!**_

_**Alright, so thanks so much for the reviews guys! I love hearing back from you, it makes me feel accomplished.(: Absol24, the same thing happens to me when I read other people's stories! Hahaha. And thank you for telling me about the grammatical errors, I'll try to fix them from now on. I just don't want to go back and fix my old ones since I'm kind of lazy…**_

_**Keep reviewing guys! Don't forget to add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions!**_

_**Bye!**_


	32. Wiped Clean

**Chapter 32**

When I open my eyes I'm blinded by sunlight. "Am I dead?" I whisper hoarsely.

A boy comes into view and says, "Oh thank god, you're awake." He looks familiar, and he also looks extremely relieved about something.

"Are you dead too?"

"No, I'm not dead and neither are you Lily."

"Lily? Is that my name? Who are you? You look familiar. Well, I think you look familiar…"

"Lily? Stop messing with me. You know who I am. It's me, Rhett."

"So Lily… That is my name. And you're Rhett… Am I supposed to know you?"

A look of panic covers his face and he says, "Lily? Did you really forget? Please, try to remember. It's me, Rhett!"

"Forget what…? All… All I remember is fish… Biting me all over… I hurt _everywhere_…"

"Oh god, Lily! Please, remember!"

"Remember what?"

"Everything! Me, your family, your friends, the arena, what's happened so far in here. Please, just remember! You have to!" He looks close to tears, and I feel bad for him. But I don't know who he is. He looks so scared, and so sad, maybe I should try to remember harder. I'll try, just for this boy whose name is the only thing I know about him.

I rack my brain that feels so helpless, scared, and empty right now. I know there's supposed to be more in there, supposed to be memories or at least _something._ "I… I'm sorry, but I don't remember…"

The tears he's been holding back stream out onto his pained, blotchy face. Before I realize what I'm doing, I reach out and stroke his hot, wet face. "I may not know who you are, but I know that I want to help you."

He looks into my eyes, and I take refuge in his deep, ashen grey eyes. They remind me of someone… "Grey… He's dead…?"

His eyes light up and he says, "You remember Grey?"

"Yes… I- I think I do…"

"Anything else?"

"N-No… That's it. But, is he dead?" My voice is more firm than before when asking the question.

"Yes," he answers in a quiet voice.

"That's what I thought…" I whisper. A searing pain runs through my knee and my hand, and I immediately lean on Rhett. He helps me over to a rock to lean against, and I have a chance to examine what happened.

"How did I get this…?" I ask, gesturing to my knee.

"A girl named Emerald shot an arrow through your knee tendon." He's close to tears again, and even though he stays silent, awaiting a response, after he says it, I know he's begging me to remember. I so desperately wish that I could.

"I don't remember that…"

His face that had a hopeful look on it now drops in disappointment, and I can't help but feel that I've somehow failed. I try to rack my brain, over and over again, but I can't remember anything else. Why can't I remember?

I stroke his dark hair out of his wet face, and put his head into my lap. "Get some rest, you've probably had a rough day."

It's probably only late afternoon, but he looks like he needs some rest. I don't even know the last time he's had sleep. He doesn't argue, and soon his breathing slows, and eventually gets to an even pace.

While he sleeps I inspect my hand. It is bothering me so much, and burns like hell. I take off the bandage Rhett probably put on, and take a closer look. My hand is oozing liquid, and looks a bit green. I feel sick just looking at it.

Similar wounds are all over my body, but none are nearly as green, or as deep, as the one on my hand.

Rhett wakes up well before the sun rises, and I smile at him. "A bit early, huh?"

"You should have woken me up earlier… You need sleep too…"

"Woops, I forgot." I say with a shrug and a smile, trying to crack a joke.

He chuckles and just says, "Of course you did." He has a pained look in his eyes.

"Rhett, why are my wounds green? What happened?"

A dark look comes across his face and he answers, "The fish that bit you… They had poison on their fangs…"

"Poison…" My mind dives into a memory, a painful one.

I see a mental flashback of the only memory I had before, the only memory I originally had, but this time in more detail. More detail, and it's much longer this time.

I see my hands, or at least what I think are my hands, and I see fish with fangs dripping with a liquid. I hear myself shouting to Rhett about poison, about how he should stay away. He says something about not caring about the poison. I remember thinking about how he cared, and a jumble of other thoughts. I remember seeing him trying to get them off of me, and the fish jumping off, a cannon going off in the distance…

I come back to the present, and Rhett is hunched over me, holding me down.

"Get off…"

He almost jumps off of me and says, "Sorry, but your eyes glazed over, then you went and started thrashing around on the ground…"

"Oh… I remembered about the fish, in more detail… Please tell me they didn't bite you too."

"They didn't."

"Thank goodness," I say with a sigh of relief. "Wait, if they had poison, how did I survive…?"

"You had sponsors that sent you medicine after you passed out. I gave it to you and now you're fine. The poison probably made you forget, but it didn't kill you."

A fine layer of sweat covers my forehead, and I wipe it away. "Wait, where am I? What am I doing here?"

Rhett sighs as I look around. "You're in the ruins of District 13. The Capitol is using it as a part of the arena in the Hunger Games. You're here because of the Hunger Games. You had volunteered to save a girl's life, and now you're in these twisted Games."

Of course his answer only sparks more questions. The only thing that kept me from asking earlier is him sleeping, and my obsession with observing my wounds. Now that I know how exactly I got all of them, and he's awake, I want answers. "What's District 13? What are the Hunger Games? Who did I volunteer for? What is the Capitol?"

That day Rhett just tries to restore my memory as best he can. It's a painstakingly slow process, but by the end of the day I've had a crash course on my life since Rhett has known me. Everything else is completely blank, and I'm dying to fill that empty space in my head. I need to know what happened to me, before all of this happened.

"So it's day 6, and there are 15 dead. Whose cannon went off yesterday when I got bitten?"

"I'm not sure. Did you see a face shining in the sky last night?"

"Yea."

"Describe them."

I give a description of the person as best I can, and I hope it's enough for Rhett to come up with a conclusion.

"Blackburn."

"I wonder how Blackburn died."

"Me too."

_You'll be watching the recap they're sure to have when you get back to the Capitol. Alive._ Why am I thinking like this? Did I want to win? Did I want Rhett to win? I don't remember… Why can't I remember?

"They'll probably want to kill someone off soon, since there are 9 left and we only had one death yesterday."

"Yea," he agrees grimly.

A cannon goes off, and I have a flashback to the bloodbath on the first day. We don't see a hover plane out here, but we do see something glint inside the wetland arena. "1 more dead today. So 8 left. We should probably move camp, just in case."

"Tomorrow. It's almost nightfall, and we should probably get some sleep."

"Okay," I agree reluctantly. Before we go to sleep, we wait to see the faces of the dead. "Zane from 10. He must have been hunted down."

"Yea…" He looks worried.

"Do you want to set up a watch for the night?"

"Sure."

"I'll take first watch. I'll wake you up when the shift is over."

"When is the shift going to be over?"

"When the shift is over."

He sighs, knowing that he won't get anything out of me, and settles into his sleeping bag.

While he sleeps and I'm on watch, I think of possible ways that the others could have been killed. It's infuriating not knowing more about my life than the occasional memory that surfaces, or what Rhett knows about me. My mind isn't supposed to be wiped this blank… I should know these things about myself, but I don't. I'm not even sure what my house looked like, what my father did, or even if I had any siblings. I know Rhett is holding back on something, but I don't know what. Maybe I told him something about my life before the Games, and he's protecting me from it. I honestly don't know.

I'm almost in tears, but then I realize that I should get some rest. I wake Rhett for his watch and turn my back on him so he can't see me silently cry myself to sleep.

_**Awwww.): And you guys didn't think I would kill her off so soon, did you? Pfft.**_

_**Alright, I'm sorry if this is a bit too much like 'The Hunger Games' by Suzanne Collins for you guys.): I never really made the connection without the review, thanks for telling me though.(: I know now, so I'll try to make it more original. I WILL NOT HAVE 2 VICTORS BY THE WAY…**_

_**Review please? As you guys know by now, I love hearing back from you guys.(: Add to alerts and favorites, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye! CHAIR MODE: ACTIVATED. BOOP.**_


	33. Left Behind

**Chapter 33**

From what Rhett has told me, it's day 7 of the Games. We've spent a week in here, and I want to get out badly. And I know that dead or alive, I will get out.

In the morning we change direction and head south. I limp along beside Rhett in between the trees. I long for something, but I'm not sure what exactly. Life? Memory?

Along the way he tries to jog my memory, saying words that might trigger something, but there's nothing there. For the fiftieth time he says, "Salt water." And I begin to get annoyed.

"Will you stop it with that? It's not helping."

"Okay, I'll stop saying 'salt water'…"

"No, it's not just that. Can you just stop trying to help bring back my memory? Why don't you just give up on trying to help me remember these things, these things that I obviously don't remember?"

I walk in front of him and turn to look right into his deep, mysterious eyes. They're so comforting, but they're swimming again. He avoids my gaze, and just walks around me. I just stand there, not knowing what to do, when I hear his almost inaudible whisper. "I'll never give up on you Lily. Ever…"

I turn around, and pursue him. He's walking much faster than I can with my bad knee, but I am determined to keep up with him. When I finally accept that I can't keep up with him, I shout, "Rhett! Wait up!"

He stops dead in his tracks, then starts going at his fast pace again.

"Rhett! Please!"

"Give me one good reason."

His words trigger a memory buried deep inside my brain, and I see something he had neglected to mention earlier. A memory of me climbing a tree, going back down, and convincing him to let me take him up. I even remember the reason he let me take him up.

I come back to the present and I see Rhett hunched over me, hugging me, apologizing over and over again. His damp face is buried in my hair. "Rhett, do you believe in love at first sight?"

He looks absolutely shocked, but he answers, "Yes." His voice is shaking.

"The first time I saw you, I had been dreaming. You had said something about bringing me back home, to my family. I understand that now. My visions are usually of my past, but that dream had somehow shown me the boy I would come to love. I saw you in the Reaping videos, and it was incredible. Who would've known I would be facing the boy that I love? Whenever I was with Alexander, I had a feeling of uneasiness, like that wasn't how it was supposed to be. I suppressed it, and now I know what it meant. I didn't love him. I have extremely strong feelings for you. I might even truly love _you._"

He's hunched over me, and now he's crying tears of joy. I wipe them away, and I say, "You mind getting off of me so I can get up?" My voice is gentle, and I say it smiling so he knows that I'm joking. He still gets off of me so I can get up though.

Once he's up he offers me a hand and pulls me up as well. Memories from the arena flood in, but this time they're not from Rhett. These are all of my personal, firsthand experiences. I'm sure that my eyes still glaze over when I'm remembering, but I manage to stay upright most of the time. I usually just lean on Rhett, it doesn't look like he minds. Just the opposite, actually.

"'Giant mutt… Indestructible… Percy… Have to get Percy to safety…'" Rhett repeats in a dreamy voice after I go through one of my memories.

"Did I really say that?"

"Nope, your exact words were, 'Golly gosh Rhett, I love you so much!'"

I can't help but laugh nonstop. "There are a lot of things wrong with what you just said, but one thing is true."

"Well it sounds like something you would say to me. And what is that then?"

"1. I never say 'golly gosh.' 2. I'm not really sure if I love you yet. I'm still confused, because even though basically everything from the arena has come back to my memory, there are huge chunks of my memory missing. I don't even remember anything about my childhood, my home, my family. 3. This is the thing that's true: Your name _is _Rhett!"

He smiles and laughs, but I know it's just to be polite. He's disappointed at my answer.

"Hey, don't be like that."

"Like what?"

"Sad, disappointed. You look better when you're not moping around."

"It's not a look. It's probably my permanent face by now, since I do it so often nowadays."

I pull his face down to my level, wrap my arms around his shoulders, and kiss him. I honestly can't take his negative attitude for much longer, and he must know it.

His hands go around my waist as he pulls me even closer, and I know that this is what he's been waiting for. What he's longed for, for a while now probably, but never complained a bit. I pull away, and put my forehead against his.

"I couldn't take all of your moping anymore." I whisper.

He smiles and whispers back, "I'll try not to mope too much anymore."

"Good," I don't have any time to say anymore, because this time he pulls me into a kiss. I take my hands and rest them against his chest, and his hands cup my face. After a while, I pull away, our foreheads still touching, and say, "We had better go now…"

He quickly pulls away from my embrace with a guilty look on his face and says, "Yea, we probably should…"

I am disappointed as he walks a bit ahead, but then quickly cover it up. "Wait up!" I say before he gets too far ahead.

_**Well there you go guys. Their first kiss.(': So sweet. But why did Rhett pull away so quickly? Why was he guilty about it? :O Is he **__**ASHAMED? **__**Dun dun dunnnnn. I've gotten repeated requests to bring Alexander back in soon. I will, eventually. Just be patient? I'm pretty far ahead and I'm still writing that part… I don't know how to bring him in any earlier than that…**_

_**Alright, so keep reviewing guys! Add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions.(:**_

_**Byee!**_


	34. Forget About the Tensions

**Chapter 34**

All we really do that day is eat, sleep, and talk a little bit. The tension is high, and I can't help but feel it's because I had kissed him. _I had thought that's what he wanted…_

"Alright, what's wrong?"

My question catches him off guard. "Wrong? Nothing's wrong. How could anything be wrong?"

"I thought you had wanted me to kiss you this morning, and now things are more awkward than ever between us."

"I _did _want to kiss you, but I didn't think that you were going to rush it. I had liked it a bit better when we were taking it slow, trying to get to know each other and all. You know, _before _you lost your memory."

"Then maybe we should take it slow again. Nothing for you for a while, and I'll just keep my distance. Besides, I _am _the one that had to ruin things by losing their memory, so I think I'll just forget that we ever kissed. How's that?" I know I'm being unfair, but I can't help it. I can't stop feeling like he's blaming me for all of our problems.

"Lily, I didn't mean-"

"Oh, okay sorry. I didn't realize that forgetting the kiss wasn't enough. I guess I'll just forget about you in general."

"Lily!"

"Oh, hi. How do you know my name? Who are you?"

He just makes a loud noise of frustration, and walks off into the trees.

"Wait!" I shout.

"What?"

"You didn't tell me your name."

He goes a bit faster now, trying to leave me behind. I just sit at the camp, and decide to camouflage it so I can go off without worrying about it. After about an hour of camouflaging everything, in exact detail mind you, I set off to the stream.

I bathe and try to work knots out of my hair. I find that the stream opens up to a small pond, which is crystal clear, so I dive underwater there and try to figure things out while holding my breath.

_First he wants to kiss me, then he says he had wanted to take it slow. Now I'm supposedly forgetting about him, and I really wish that I could. I just can't seem to get him out of my head…_

My thoughts go around and around, always circling back to one thought. _Rhett._

When I climb out of the pond I pull my arena outfit on again, and head back to camp. _Should I apologize? Maybe he should first… _I don't remember much, but I am pretty sure I've never been this nervous about talking to any other guy in my life.

Rhett is sitting in the middle of our camouflaged camp, and I consider apologizing. I sit across from him, and we sit there for a little while, silent.

I say, "I'm so, sorry Rhett," at the exact same time he says, "I'm so sorry Lily."

We both look up at each other, surprised.

"What are you sorry for Lily?"

"Freaking out on you. I wasn't being fair, and I knew it. It's just that, I think I might have taken your words the wrong way. You just confuse me so much, when I'm already so confused."

He looks down and I ask, "What are you sorry for?"

"For making it seem like it was all your fault for the way our relationship was going. How could you have purposely lost your memory? Besides, our relationship _did _need a jumpstart, since I'm pretty sure I never would have had the guts to do it. I'm glad you did. It's just that I always feel like I'm taking advantage of you or something…"

He's so sweet and considerate… "I should have been more careful when I was at the stream, that way I probably wouldn't have gotten bit. And I wouldn't have lost my memory…"

"It's not your fault that I had been distracting you from watching the stream when you were filling up the water bottles." He looks extremely agitated.

I reach out and grab his hand, and clasp it in both of mine. "It's not your fault that I lost my memory. You can't take responsibility for that."

"Yes, I can. I can and will, for that matter."

"No, just don't. If you insist on saying that you distracting me makes it your fault, then we go to this: It's my fault that I got distracted by you. Are we done yet?"

He falls silent, and I hold his hand firmly. It seems to calm him down a bit.

"I'm going to go take some time to calm down a bit, okay?"

"Okay," he whispers. Before I leave, I make him eat something and give him a hug. He seems in a sort of trance… Well, either that or he's deep in thought.

After I leave I limp to a clearing where the trees are thick around it, so nobody can sneak up on me without making some noise. I don't know how to sort out how I feel, so I just stand there for a little while. Sometimes I pace, other times I just sit down hopelessly. Eventually I let my mind go, and don't really think about anything. I begin to move gracefully, in a sort of dance. It feels so right to do this, and I wonder if this is what I did before I lost my memory.

I check the position of the sun in the sky, and see I've spent an hour doing this. I shake my head, as if I had been in a trance. Somehow I had danced around my injuries, and I didn't feel very much pain. I begin to walk back to camp, but I collapse.

"Shit…" I curse quietly. I try to pull myself, up, but I collapse again. How is it that I didn't feel any pain while I was enjoying myself by dancing, but now I can't even walk?

I drag myself over to the trees and break myself off a fairly thick branch. I'll use it as a walking stick to get back to camp. Then we'll see what happens.

It takes me at least twice as long to get back to camp as it did leaving it, but I do manage. When Rhett sees me he wraps his arm around my waist and I put my arm around his shoulders, so he can take most of my weight. When I'm having even more trouble doing that since he's so much taller than me, he simply picks me up and carries me to the center of our camp.

"What happened?" He asks.

"Well, I kind of ran out of energy coming back… My leg sort of gave out."

I feel wetness around my knee so I carefully remove the jumpsuit and pull my pant leg up. My bandage is almost soaked in blood, and I finally feel the searing pain in my knee. Rhett pulls off the bandage and we see how my wound has split open, and even looks a bit bigger than last time.

"What were you doing to calm down?"

"Dancing…" I admit calmly, but quietly.

"Please don't dance anymore. The blood you lost is enough to make most people faint, but you must be stronger than that since you got all the way back here."

"I didn't notice any pain until I stopped dancing."

"Caught up in the moment, and then you got your side effects later on?"

"Yes…"

Just then he shouts, "Idiot!"

"Excuse me?"

"No, not you. Me! I forgot we had a needle and some thread in one of the first aid kits. Now we can stitch it closed."

"Oh… Okay," I'm not crazy about the idea of a needle weaving in and out of my skin to close a wound, but that's not what is upsetting me. What upset me is that I had forgotten completely about the packs of supplies we have, and I thought that I had remembered everything about my time in the arena.

Earlier I had been able to cope with not having any memory of my life before, but now it's unbearable and infuriating. I want to hit something, but I would probably hurt myself more if I tried.

Rhett stitches my knee closed, and I simply watch. I know it's my own limb, but watching him weave the needle makes me feel like it is somebody else's knee.

When he's finally done, it's early afternoon and the heat is killing us.

"Do you want to go cool down in the pond I found?" I ask.

"Sure."

We walk to stream and take off our jumpsuits. Rhett's underclothes are the color of coal. _That's right… He's from District 12, coal mining._

I'm just waiting to jump into the water, or at least wade in, but Rhett picks me up, despite my shrieks of joy to put me down, and wades into the water.

"Rhett! Come on, put me down!" I shriek happily.

"You asked for it!"

"What? Wait, NO-" He pays no attention to my protests as he throws me into the water, and my whole body is submerged.

He's dying of laughter above the surface, so I decide to pull a nasty little prank on him. I am already on the bottom of the pond, which isn't all that deep, so I just lie there motionless and hold my breath.

Eventually he gets worried since I can hold my breath for a surprisingly long amount of time, so he dives underwater trying to get to me. He has his eyes closed, consequently he can't see underwater, so I swim up behind him trying hard not to disturb the water much. Once I'm behind him I grab him and ride piggyback style, so he panics a little bit. Well, at least until I press my lips against his cheek, and then he knows it's me. I let go of him and we both surface.

"Lily! I was worried!"

"I figured, since you dove underwater to get me." I can't help but laugh so hard and so long that I get a stitch in my side.

"It's not that funny!"

"Actually, it kind of is!" I gasp, between laughs. Eventually he gives up the mother Henning and laughs too. We eventually stop, and I say. "I'm sorry, but you kind of set yourself up for that one."

"I know; I just couldn't resist throwing you in."

"Just like how I can't resist THIS?" I splash water into his face so he splutters a bit.

"Yes, and almost exactly how I can't resist doing THIS!" He dunks my head underwater and I come back up spluttering like he did.

"Oh it's on now."

"You bet it is."

I dive underwater, touch the bottom of the lake, and spring off. I rocket up beneath Rhett, who is looking around, waiting for me to surface somewhere, and I pull him underneath, feet first.

I surface first and when he finally surfaces he says, "I'm not sure I want it to be on anymore. You win, I should have guessed since you _are _the stronger swimmer!"

_Right… I'm from District 4, fishing. Plenty of water around there to swim in._

"So does that mean you're surrendering?" I ask, swimming closer to him and putting my arms around his shoulders.

"Nope, not yet!" He yells as his arms go around my waist as he pulls me underwater with him once more. This time, though, he's hanging on to me and we're both falling together. He has me in a bear hug, but I eventually I am able to pull away and start circling around him. He feels my motions and tries to grab me, but I'm a bit faster than him. Eventually he has to surface to get some air, and I come up right behind him.

"Done yet? Or will you only stop until one of us is dead?" I ask laughing.

"Hmmm… Let's see…"

I splash his face again and dive underwater, just to see if he will pursue. Of course he does, so I get him in a headlock and pull him back to the surface.

"Surrender?" I ask.

"Never!" He tries to pull me underwater again but I let go of him and rocket towards shore. I don't need a knee to swim; I know a lot of other strokes.

I reach the muddy shore and wait for the sun to dry me, and for Rhett to finally get here. When he does he tries to splash me, but I roll out of the way and I say, "You sure you don't want to surrender?"

"Hmm, I think I will."

"Good choice."

"Why is that?"

"Because it was a losing battle for you from the start."

We start to playfully argue, and are still arguing when we are returning to camp.

"You know what, let's just say this: We are both amazing at water fights." I say ruffling my wet hair.

"Deal," he agrees.

It's late afternoon now, and I'm pretty sure we are both getting dehydrated, despite the fact that we had just been swimming in a pond. I toss him his water bottle and take a long swig from my own.

After a satisfied sigh I put my water bottle back down and we start to tidy up our already neat camp, just for a lack of things to do. Once we've done so around 3 times, Rhett says, "Okay, we _really _need something to do."

"Yea… The thing is that I can't really do much that involves my knee. My hand seems to be doing extremely well though, almost no pain."

"Oh yea… And at least there's one good thing about that bite."

My memory. It keeps coming up in our conversations, and I can't help but feel uncomfortable. You never really appreciate something until it's really gone, and I finally understand that now. I miss being able to remember so many things about my life, but now that's all gone.

"Yea…"

"Sorry, sensitive topic."

"No, no, there's no need to apologize. I'm kind of used to it by now."

"If you say so…"

We just kind of sit around for the rest of the day, and time goes by so slowly. We try to start conversations, but I always kind of drift off and end up killing the conversation. I can't help it; my mind is always drifting off to something else. I'm wondering about my family, friends, and my home. Things that everyone thinks are so simple and take for granted are the things that are tormenting me.

That night there aren't any faces shining in the sky, so Rhett and I both know that the Capitol is hungry for another death.

We don't bother to set up a watch again, I don't mind. I think being killed would be a kindness at this point. I'm with Rhett, so I will die happy. I have no memories, so I don't know if I have anything to live for. I'm just hoping that Rhett will cancel out not knowing anything about my past.

In the middle of the night when I am having a nightmare about being a murderer back home as well, 3 cannons go off in the distance.

_**Cannons in the distance. The distaaannceeee. Silver parachutes descendddd. Oh how I love that song.(: Sorry, I had to. Alright, so WHO DIED? It's the FINAL FOUR GUYS. Sorry that I didn't do any sponsorship thingy, I'm kind of lazy.**_

_**Thanks for sticking with this story so long guys! I kind of lost my touch since there aren't as many like huge really good cliffhangers…/: This story is nearing its end.)': Well, I'm also sorry to say that I **__**will **__**keep circling back to her thinking about losing her memory because I kind of wanted her to think of it as a weakness, and I wanted her to hate it.(;**_

_**Keep reviewing! You guys make me a happy camper when I get new reviews.(: I'm not camping though… Add to favorites and alerts, and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye! (The song that I mentioned at the beginning of this author's note is called 'The Arena' by Joey Graceffa and other tributes. I love it!)**_


	35. I Will Stop at Nothing

**Chapter 35**

I shoot up into a sitting position and turn to see that Rhett is doing the same. _Thank goodness, he's not one of the dead._

"Who was that?" I ask him frantically.

"I don't know." Of course he doesn't know, why am I asking him?

"Should we move camp?" I ask.

"No, let them come to us. I'll be ready."

I smile and say, "At least I'll be able to rest easy knowing that you're right here to protect me."

"It's my duty, ma'am." He says with a salute. I laugh, and remember something. Something about my brother.

I dive into a memory about my brother departing, and then one about a man telling me that my brother is dead. When the memory is over, I come back to Rhett gasping and he's looking at me strangely.

"What?" I snap. It's not like he hasn't seen me have one of my flashbacks before.

"This one was different," He says, as if reading my mind. "Your back was arched for a little while, and you were gasping the entire time. Sometimes you were hissing too… And your eyes weren't glazed over; they were stormier this time."

"Oh… Maybe because I remembered something farther back?"

"Maybe. What did you remember?"

"I remembered my brother, Brandon. He's dead…"

"Oh… I'm sorry about you having to remember you lost him Lily…"

"It's okay… At least there's _something _to fill that emptiness in head." My heart feels a pang at the thought of only now remembering my brother. _I should have been able to remember him earlier… He __**is**__ my brother after all…_

Rhett can tell I'm uncomfortable, so he stays silent and we both try to go back to sleep. I can't seem to drift off though, and when I finally do begin to feel a bit drowsy the sun is beginning to rise._ No sleep for me, then I guess._

Like Rhett had suggested, we don't move camp. We will let them come and find us, unless the Gamemakers choose differently. They'll probably want it to speed up since it's already the final four. _20 children dead… 2 are dead because of you…_

I shake my head, trying to clear it, and decide to get up. I'm not going to get any sleep now, or for a very long time for that matter. I need to get my mind off of all of this, but it's getting harder and harder to fantasize about a perfect family waiting for me back home. Now I know that my brother is dead, and I don't know how many others in my family. _Dead or alive, they were my family. I need to know about them… I need to remember my past, discover who I am again…_ It sounds cheesy, but it's true. When you don't know who you are, you feel the need to find out once again.

I sit up on a rock for a few hours, a bow with an arrow nocked on the string sitting by my side just in case. It's around 8 in the morning when Rhett wakes up.

"About time you woke up there, Sleeping Beauty." I tease.

"Beauty?" He questions, lifting an eyebrow.

"Have you seen yourself sleep? You look so cute. What makes it better is that it's one of the few times your mouth is shut."

He snorts and pretends to look mad, but I can't keep a straight face and burst out laughing. He eventually joins in too, but we stop after only about a minute of laughing. Our faces grow grim at the realization that we are part of the final four, and we will eventually have to kill the others off to survive.

"Rhett?"

"Yea?"

"Have you killed anyone yet?"

He ponders the question and eventually answers, "No. But when the time comes, I will probably murder everyone in my way."

I sit there, silent as I realize that he's probably the only person in here that didn't kill anyone yet. The faces of the two girls I have killed haunt me every single day, and I just wish that they would go away. Sometimes I swear that I can see their blood dripping from my hands, and when I try to wash it off it never goes away. I don't think it ever will.

There is something different hanging in the air today, death. Today must be the day that one of us comes out alive, while the others die at their hands. I try to shake off this feeling as well, but like the blood, it doesn't go away.

"Rhett?"

"Yes, Lily?"

"I want you to listen to what I have to say, and please don't interrupt."

"Okay…"

"I want you to go home, back to District 12. Your life will be easier with the money that you will receive, and I can't go back home. I remember close to nothing about my life before the arena, so I might not even have anyone to share my wealth with. I'm sure you'll have _someone._"

"Lily… I want you to go home to District 4. Maybe you seeing things back in your own District will jog your memory, you know?"

"I would need someone to help me jog the memories, and other than you, I'm not sure if there's anyone back there that wouldn't give up on me. Who would care enough to help bring my memories back."

"I'm sure there's going to be someone, like your father."

"Yea, maybe… Wait a second, my father? How would you know that I have a father?" My voice is more curious than accusing.

"Oh crap… That's right, you told me off at training, and told me a bit about your family. You said that you and your dad are the only ones left in your family… Um, that you had a brother, sister, grandmother, and mother who were all killed." He's struggling to remember what I might have said. I may be able to remember almost anything in the Games and a little bit before, but I don't remember telling him about my family. "I think you said something about your dad forgetting about you… Remarrying, um you have 2 younger siblings… Living to ruin your life?" He's trying hard to remember my exact words probably.

"Thank you…"

"For what? I just proved my own point wrong…"

"For trying hard to remember that conversation we had. At least I know more about my life than I did before."

"Um, no problem."

I try to remember my stepmother, stepsiblings, and father; basically anybody that I learned about from Rhett. I only remember my brother's name though, and I cling to it like a lifeline. Brandon Gallina. Simply knowing his name makes me happy, even though I don't know almost anything about him. At least there's one ray of sunshine in a place that will probably be dark forever. "One grain of hope," I whisper.

The morning goes by quickly since I'm grilling Rhett, trying to get as much information he might have about me out of him. He finally stops me around lunch by saying, "I'm pretty sure that I don't know anything else about you." He sees the disappointed look on my face and says, "So, what do you want for lunch? Maybe we should go into the food you got from the Cornucopia?"

"Okay, go ahead. I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat."

"I have to eat to stay alive. I'm not going to live, remember?"

He sits down next to me and puts his arm around me, but I just stand up and walk away.

"What's wrong?"

"Everything. I'm in a fight to the death that I had volunteered for, and I don't even know why. I have a knee wound that prevents me from calming myself down through dancing. I had poison in my body from some fish that I got bitten by, and now I have long term memory loss. I'm pretty sure that my memories I have remembered are even slowly starting to fade away." My arms are crossed over my chest and Rhett is sitting behind me, silent.

He gets up and slowly wraps his arms around my waist, and I begin to shake in his embrace. I start sobbing, letting out all of the emotions out at once. He turns me around and I bury my face into his shirt. He strokes my hair but doesn't say anything, which makes it a bit better. He knows that words aren't going to soothe me, and that the only thing that will do the job is letting me get it all out at once like this.

It takes me a little while to cry myself out, but when I do I feel a lot less helpless. I'm _done _feeling helpless, scared, and hopeless. The crying little girl inside of me is gone now.

From now on I'm going to actually do something about my problems. I'll do whatever it takes to get rid of them, and no one is going to stop me.

_**Nothing is going to stop her? Does that include Rhett? :O I'm sorry nothing really interesting happened in this chapter guys./: But I can't exactly throw a mutt into every chapter. :p**_

_**Only 3 chapters left, and then the epilogue! D: **_

_**Well review, add to favorites and maybe alerts if you want (I update daily), and PM me any suggestions.**_

_**Bye! (': I'm getting way too emotional about this stuff… Sorry guys if you think the romance is too sappy and girly and stuff, I got really caught up in it…**_


	36. So the Hunt Begins

**Chapter 36**

Rhett and I agree to find the surviving tributes together, but I can tell he is reluctant. I'm sure that he thinks that he will have to kill. I won't lie to him by telling him he won't have to, because I know that he probably will.

We only bring one pack each, and don't even bother to pack up our camp. We know that we won't be coming back.

We each have some food, water, first aid kits, and weapons on us. Along the way I practice with my knives, just to make sure that I am still able to win a fight with another tribute.

"I'm still wondering who is alive." I say to Rhett.

"Me too. The final 7 were you and I, of course, and the Career pack."

"How many were in the pack?"

"Four."

"That only comes up to 6, then."

"Oh yea… Who is it then…"

"You're asking me? I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to know everyone in this arena, but then I almost died and lost my memory."

"Sorry, just sort of wondering aloud."

"It's fine."

He falls silent, and I do too. Maybe I'll be able to remember who the last tributes are… Probably not, though. Not without somebody's face shining in the sky.

We reach the entrance to the wetland area, and I take a deep breath. "Let's go."

"Are you ready?"

"I said, _let's. Go."_

"Okay, okay, I'm opening it."

We enter the arena and stay on the dry land, waiting to hear any footsteps. We stand there, trying to stay hidden, waiting to hear any signs of life like idiots for an hour.

"Nobody is here. So they all found their way out…" Rhett says quietly.

"Yea, we should probably check though."

"Alright."

First we walk around the perimeter of the arena, and when I reach a door marked '4F' I remember my stylist, getting out of my area, and when it's over I ask Rhett if we can walk around a bit. He agrees since he saw my eyes glaze over, and we set out. I'm sure now that nobody is in here, but I need to find places to trigger something in my head.

I start thrashing around in a clearing and Rhett has to restrain me when I remember a fight with the other Careers, Grey being killed, but I relax a bit when I kick the crap out of them for it.

We reach the Cornucopia and I remember a bloodbath, killing a girl in cold blood, and Grey kissing me in the night. I also remember 2 other tributes that I had given some supplies to… I'm not sure who they are, but I hope they're still alive. The thing is that I have a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that they're both dead.

"Rhett, were there twins in the Games?"

"Yea, Chance and Doyle I think you said."

"Are they dead?"

"Yes…" his voice is quiet, like it always is when he talks about one of the people that were killed.

"Let's go back outside and find the others. I want this all to end, one way or another."

We take our time getting back outside, not for fear of being killed, but for the fear of killing. I want to postpone getting yet another soul on my conscience for as long as I can, and Rhett isn't exactly eager either.

I eventually find some fresh footprints in the dirt, so I have Rhett try to be as quiet as possible as we follow the tracks. Rhett realizes something weird about them, and voices his concerns to me.

"Um, Lily? What is with these prints?"

I sigh and look down, and see that he's right. I examine it closely and see that there are smaller footprints inside of them.

"They're already being stalked by someone else."

"Or they're together."

I highly doubt it, but I don't say anything. I continue on soundlessly, and the trees are beginning to get a bit thicker. I don't pay any heed to them though, because I can tell we're getting close. There's a tingling in my bones, and I can just feeling the churning in my stomach. I know that I'll have to be the one to kill them.

I hear a gurgling, and realize that that's why the trees are thickening. The stream is nearby, and that's where they're going.

I signal to Rhett to proceed with caution as we emerge out of the tree line. I see something moving on the other side of the stream, and they're pretty far ahead. I motion Rhett to move back, and we have a heated conversation considering the fact that we're whispering.

"I have to go ahead and see who it is!"

"No way! They might be dangerous, I'm not letting you go ahead alone!"

"I have to! How else are we going to find out who they are! Just trust me on this one, please?"

"The last time I let you do something alone like this you lost your memory, at least let me go with you?"

"No! Then if they catch us they will have us both, and you won't have a chance at winning. I'm not giving up on the hopes that you will win."

"You better give up on those hopes soon, because I'm going to make sure you win!"

"We are _not _having this conversation right now!"

"I think we are! Come on, at least then you will be able to remember everything!"

"I won't _want _to live though, since you won't be there!"

"Well neither will I!"

"Too bad, because you will win even if I have to tie you to a tree and kill the other two tributes to do it!"

He falls silent when he realizes that I mean to kill myself as well if I choose to go through with that plan.

"Stay here," I say firmly, and he doesn't argue this time. He just crouches grimly and silently, so I say, "Come here. Can't I have a goodbye hug?"

He gets up and gives me a hug, and then he pokes me in the stomach, which makes me giggle. He keeps poking me, but when he reaches my ribs his eyes grow wide. He zips open my jumpsuit and pulls up my shirt. I have a bra on underneath, but I don't think I would have really cared either way.

When he pulls up my shirt he reveals my torso to the whole world, but I don't think he is aware of everyone else right now. Right now he's focused on me.

"Lily, have you been eating _anything _lately?"

"That's a huge overreaction. I've simply lost a bit of weight."

"Look at yourself Lily!"

I don't believe him until I do look down at myself and my stomach sinks, he's right. I look malnourished and I can easily count my ribs. I look like I haven't eaten in a week.

"That's none of your concern right now." I say, pulling down my shirt and zipping my jumpsuit back up. I then set off down the stream, staying inside of the tree line though. The thing is that Rhett follows me, and walks by my side. He matches my stride and pace, and I'm sort of glad that he does.

"Lily, it is my concern right now! _You're_ my main concern."

I slip my hand into his but I continue walking. He takes it as a cue to come with me, which it is. We go as quickly as we can to try and catch up with the figure, but it's difficult since we have to stay silent. All of a sudden the person stops walking and Rhett and I freeze. Wait, correction: the _people_ stop walking. Rhett was right, they were traveling together. It's almost unbelievable that they could keep an alliance for this long. Rhett and I don't kill each other, even if it does seem like we will do so with some of the arguments we have, because we want the other person to win. I'm not sure what the arrangement is in the other alliance, but it would be interesting to find out.

I strain to hear the hum of conversation over the gurgling of the stream, but I can't make out what they're saying. I can tell that it's a male and a female though, maybe they are lovers.

Rhett lets go of my hand and tries to get a bit closer but staying inside the tree line in hopes of hearing the conversation. Everything seems to go in slow motion as he is getting closer. Rhett steps on a fallen branch a half a second before I can warn him, the 2 people across the stream's heads snap up, Rhett has to stand dangerously still; the 2 people begin to advance to our side of the stream. It's like a living nightmare for me, everything is going painstakingly slow. What doesn't go slow though is my brain; it's working nonstop right now, like a machine.

I am panicking so much right now that when I look up at the 2 people wading through the shallow water I recognize their faces, one is from a memory, but I can't seem to pull their names up.

_**Bwahh, I keep circling around to the memory thing. I couldn't figure out what else to do…**_

_**Alright, so keep those reviews coming guys! I love getting feedback from you guys, it makes me feel better as a writer.(: Add to alerts and favorites, and PM me any suggestions!**_

_**Only 2 more chapters and then the epilogue!):**_

_**Bye guys!**_


	37. Confrontations

**Chapter 37**

I throw a questioning look at Rhett, and he just looks back at me helplessly. He doesn't know what I am asking; he doesn't know that I don't remember these people. I am trying to calm down so that maybe their names will come to me, but it's just not happening. I can't calm down, and their names won't come.

"Run?" Rhett mouths and I shake my head. We should finish this here and now, and I'm too close to wait.

They emerge from the stream, and I decide to meet them at the bank. I pull Rhett up and we emerge from the tree line.

"So nice to see you, Lily my love." The boy says, I remember seeing him in my memories but I don't remember his name. He had betrayed me to the Career pack; I know that for a fact. Or do I? I'm not sure what I know right now.

"I wish I could say the same," I snarl. I guess I'll just try to avoid saying any names.

"You remember Lavender, don't you?" He asks innocently, wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her into a kiss.

"Of course I do, you little man whore." So that's her name, Lavender. I just need his name.

"I would prefer it if you called me by my name, Lily. Throwing around nasty words like that isn't very nice, after all." He quickly limps over to me and grabs me by the shoulders, holding me close. He's handsome, I have to admit that. He has bronze hair, tanned skin, and chiseled features. He's not who I want, though. Before I might have wanted him, but now the only boy I want is Rhett.

Rhett begins to advance on him, but I signal for him to back off. I dive into a memory, and I remember _everything _this boy has done to me. His name is still a mystery, though. "Looks like today is going to be the _second _day that I touch you in your little special place. I sincerely hope that it doesn't bring you any pleasure, because it sure will bring some to me." I knee him in the groin, hard. He grunts in pain, and backs up, stumbling over one of his legs.

He lands flat on his backside with an, "Oof!" and I can't help but put on a smirk. The girl rushes over to him and shouts at me, "You little bitch! Smooth! You just _had _to go and hurt him like this, didn't you?" A memory drags me under, and I remember the Opening Ceremonies and how she treated me on the first day of training. When I come to Rhett is holding me up.

"What's wrong with her?" Asks the boy.

"Who knows, she always has been the type to _fall_ _over_."

"Bitch," I mumble under my breath, taking my weight off of Rhett and standing on my own.

"Me?" He whispers back, and I can't help but smile.

"No, but you know they will be going down soon."

"Yea, it was kind of expected."

I rush at Lavender, taking out my knives and ignoring the splitting pain in my knee. I tackle her and wrestle her into a kneeling position. I rest my knees on her calves and hold her arms back with one of my own. I use my other hand to press a razor sharp knife against her throat. She doesn't know what's going on until it's too late, and starts to shriek, "ALEXANDER! HELP ME!" So that's his name.

He just sits there, eyes wide as he looks at me about to kill her right there, just a few feet to his side.

"COME ON! HELP ME ALEXANDER! I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME!"

"Bitch, please. You're ugly and nobody likes you. I was just hoping that you would kill Lily over here for me, she's the only real threat left."

She starts shrieking out a string of cuss words at him, and I can't help but laugh like a maniac. It's just too ironic to pass up. A girl is about to die and he still doesn't care, he just wanted her to do his dirty work for him.

"Do you even love anyone _but _yourself, Alexander?"

Lavender is still shrieking, so he can't hear me. I am starting to get annoyed by her, and I would have needed to do this later anyways. I slit her throat quickly, and let her silent, ragdoll body drop to the ground. Alexander's eyes grow wide as her cannon goes off, and I say, "Let's go for a little walk. Come on Rhett, Alexander. Keep up."

Alexander goes first while Rhett and I keep an eye on him from behind. We are walking side by side, and I'm just wondering if it's bad that I'm getting a bit of joy from this. I feel the blood lust rising in me from killing Lavender and I can't wait to kill Alexander. I can't wait to hear another cannon, and I can't wait to know that it's from me. Rhett keeps glancing over at me with a worried expression, and I don't know what that's about. I start shoot him annoyed looks, so he tries to be a bit more inconspicuous when he looks at me.

Eventually Alexander stops and turns around. "What?" I ask him roughly. I can taste his blood already.

"Can I talk to you, Lily? In private?"

I'm about to say no, but then I catch Rhett looking at me worriedly again. "Sure."

Alexander leads me off a small distance from Rhett and says, "Come on Lily. Don't you feel anything between us? You don't love Rhett. You love me, and I love you. Don't you remember?"

I give a bark of a laugh and say, "Do you love anyone _but _yourself?"

"Yes. You."

"Wh-"

"Remember how we used to be? Comforting each other, helping each other, we even kissed."

"No, I don't remember ever kissing you." Crap, I just let him onto me. Maybe he didn't notice…

"What do you mean, you don't remember? We kissed several times."

"I remember, but I just meant that, um…"

His mouth curls into a wicked smile, "You lost your memory, didn't you?"

"No."

"Prove it."

"Fine."

"What's my last name? What's the name of the girl who you volunteered for? Who is your best friend back home?"

"Um… Uh, I volunteered for… Breeze Climpf… And um…"

"You don't remember anything. You _did _lose your memory, Lily. Then how are you sure that Rhett doesn't want to kill you and that I'm your lover?"

"Because, he told me. He helped me remember."

"What if he planted those thoughts and false memories into your head?"

I fall silent, because I think I believe it. My blood lust for him fades, and turns to Rhett.

He takes my hands in his and says, "Come on, Lily. We can be like we used to. You have wanted to be with me your entire life, and I wanted you to be with me."

I stand there pondering my options while Alexander and Rhett both stand within my line of sight. Rhett is looking so worried, staring right at me. Alexander is looking deep into my eyes, looking for any sign of the previous me. I don't know what to do, who to choose. They both seem so nice right now… I'm not sure I can trust my memories, because Alexander might be right. I'm not sure if he ever really betrayed me. Rhett might have planted them into my thoughts, but who knows? Alexander might be lying.

They both seem like liars to me right now, and I'm thinking of just killing them both and winning for myself when Alexander easily picks me up and throws me. I scream, for lack of something else to do, and I see where he was aiming. I land and start rolling extremely fast into a deep ditch the size of the wetland arena.

**_By the way, Alexander figured out that she lost her memory so fast because he's a good guesser. Jk, lolol. It's because he knows her so well and stuff._**

_**Oh snap, shit's about to get real. Throwing people into ditches, tsk tsk. **_

_**Well there's only one chapter after this and then the epilogue.)':**_

_**Keep reviewing guys! Add to alerts (if you want since you know I update daily) and favorites, and PM me any last minute suggestions you might want me to add in. Love you all!**_

_**Bye! BRO FIST!**_


	38. Putting an End to it All

**Chapter 38**

My life flashes before my eyes as I roll into the ditch, which is extremely steep. My memories flood back into my mind as I scream and fall, sometimes becoming airborne when there is a small ledge. I remember my family, my friends, and basically my life back home. The 15 years I've lived go by extremely fast, but everything outside of my memories seems to go by in slow motion. Me flying through the air, rolling, getting cut on a rock and a girl's screams. I think the screams are mine…

By the time I reach the bottom I remember everything, and I'm mad as hell. I curse myself for believing Alexander, and all I want to do is curl up into a ball and cry down here. The thing is that I know that they are probably battling it out up there, and I need to help Rhett. I want to beg for Rhett's forgiveness, and if he does choose to forgive me I look forward to him wrapping his arms around me more than anything else. Alexander is going to pay and I'm going to give him hell.

I scramble out of the ditch, which is a meticulously slow process. I can barely take it; I need to get up there _now._ By the time I do reach the top, I see that they are already doing some sword to sword combat. I stand up straight and just gawk at how skilled they both are, but Alexander is struggling. _How did Alexander even get a sword…?_

Rhett sees me first and shouts, "LILY?" Alexander sees this as the opportunity he's been waiting for. Since Rhett is finally distracted, Alexander plunges his sword into Rhett's right lung, leaving a deep cut. I shriek in despair, and rush over to them. Alexander turns around wickedly, and pulls his sword out. It's covered in blood, and I feel lightheaded just looking at it. I'm not sure that I even want to see the condition Rhett is in. His cannon hasn't gone off yet, though. I still have hope.

I instinctively pull out 2 long bladed knives and get into a ready position, and he tenses. He tricked me, so why not trick him as well?

I lower my weapons and sigh with relief. "Oh thank god, you killed him. Now we can be together."

He relaxes and says, "Yea, and I did it for you baby. I love you, Lily."

I try hard not to look disgusted, and barely stop myself from gritting my teeth as I say, "Oh Alexander. I love you too."

He smiles and comes to hug me, sword still in hand. He's going to stab me in the back and then finish Rhett off. I stand still as he comes to me, knives still in hand. He wraps his arms around me and I can imagine his sword poised over my heart… That won't happen as long as I'm alive. I take one of my knives and bury it deep in his stomach, and he stiffens. I hear his sword clatter to the ground, and I twist my knife. He crumples to the ground and I stay up, knife still in hand. I sit on his chest, which makes him wince in pain. Even if I don't weigh very much at all. I rest my knees on his arms, pinning them down.

I lean close to his ear and whisper, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me…" He gulps and I begin to shout. "HOW COULD YOU TRICK ME? YOU ARE HEARTLESS, ALEXANDER O'NEIL. HEARTLESS. YOU ONLY LOVE YOURSELF. I THOUGHT THAT WE'D HAD TRUE LOVE, BUT NO. NOW I KNOW DIFFERENT. FOR YOU, LOVE ONLY LASTED FOR A FEW MOMENTS AT A TIME. EVERYTIME I WAS WITH YOU I SUPPRESSED MY INSTINCTS TELLING ME THAT YOU WEREN'T ANY GOOD, SINCE YOU WERE ALL I HAD EVER WANTED, I IGNORED INSTINCT. TRUE LOVE IS SUPPOSED TO LAST FOREVER AND EVER."

He closes his eyes in fear of me, and I want to slap him. But instead, I mock him. "Speaking of ever, Alexander, may the odds be _ever _in your favor." He makes a final attempt at preserving his life by trying to throw me off of him, but I don't budge. His weak attempt only served to piss me off even more. "You know what? You're only making me pissed. Any last words?" He shakes his head, and I laugh and mumble under my breath, "Of course. You don't have anyone at home that you love.

"Well," I say. "Guess what? Take a nice long look at me, because I'm going to be the last thing you see before you die." I stab him in the jugular, and while he chokes on his own blood I stab him in the heart. It's kind of ironic, actually. I hear a cannon go off, so I panic and look over to Rhett. He's alive, but just barely. I can see his chest moving slightly. I get off of Alexander's still body which is becoming cold fast, and I rush over to Rhett's side. The wound in his chest is frighteningly large.

"Rhett! I'm so sorry, I had to get rid of him. I never should have left your side! He planted lies in my head! I remember things now! I even know what the things you said in my dreams meant!" I am sobbing, and I still have Alexander's blood on my hands.

"It's okay Lily. And what did they mean?" Each word he says pains him, and I can tell he's hanging on just for me. He's a fighter.

"You have to kill me. My family is all dead, so if you kill me that would mean that you bring me to them. You have to win, please Rhett!"

"No, I can't kill you Lily. I can't win. I don't want to live in a world where you don't exist." He is talking a bit more, but I know it's sapping his energy.

"Well I don't want to live in a world without you! Just don't leave me like I had left you!"

"Lily, I will never leave you."

I'm sobbing uncontrollably, and seeing him dying makes it ten times worse. "Please, Rhett. Just please, kill me."

"You know I can't do that."

"Yes, you can!"

"No, I can't." He says in a weak yet firm voice.

"Fine, then I'll do it myself." I take off my jumpsuit and pull up my pant leg. My bandage is soaked through; it looks like I've torn the stitches. I rip off the bandage and cut the wound open again, even bigger this time, gritting my teeth as I do so. Rhett just stares wide eyed and helpless as my life begins to trickle away.

"Fine, I'll die sooner anyways." He says, blood gurgling in his mouth. He's right of course; a wound to the chest would kill someone quicker than one to the knee.

I rip off my shirt sleeve and find one of my major arteries.

"Lily, no!"

I scream as I slice it open with my knife and watch the blood trickle down my arm. I give him a satisfied smile and I lay down next to him, both of us dying fast.

"Oh Lily…"

"I'm sorry Rhett." My skin is turning pale, and Rhett's face is already a shade paler than I am. He's still going to die before me.

"You mean that you're sorry that you aren't dead yet so I can win." He says, making blood bubbles pop in his mouth.

I stay silent, but when he's close to death I know it's time. "I love you, Rhett."

He doesn't hesitate as he says, "I love you too, Lily."

His blood is trickling from his mouth, but I don't care. I kiss him full on the lips, and he kisses back weakly. I pull away and hold his hand, and soon his cannon goes off. His blood covers my lips.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please give a round of applause for the victor of the 1st Annual Hunger Games, Lily Gallina!" Waldemar Frobisher's voice booms over the hidden speaker system, and I panic. When Rhett died he took my last fiber of sanity, so I truly am insane now.

I pick up Rhett's sword from his side, give him a kiss goodbye, and sink his sword deep into my heart. I crumple to the ground next to his cold, dead body. I take one look at Rhett and close my eyes, satisfied that he will be the last thing I ever see. The last thing I hear is the Capitol audience's shocked gasps as I lay there, sword still protruding from my chest. I smile as I lay there, my own warm blood pooling around me, because the weird thing is that I feel no pain from this. "I- I don't ever want to forget again, or to be forgotten… Please, don't let me ever be forgotten… I don't ever want to be forgotten…" I mumble almost inaudibly.

I all of a sudden remember every good thing that has ever happened in my life, and I can't believe that I had forgotten when my father had refused to beat me when Sharon told him to. "Daddy, I forgive you." I whisper weakly. These are my last words before I die and join Rhett and my family in a place that's safe that will always accept me.

_**)': So sad. And before you guys ask, yes I did plan all of this. I planned before I even started writing, actually… That explains the slogan, 'In these games, nobody really wins.' Yes, I made up a slogan for it...**_

_**Well, yea that was the ending! I hope you guys are satisfied, if not, then the epilogue will be posted the day after tomorrow and all questions will be answered then. Well, at least most of them...**_

_**I am so sad that this is over. I'm shocked how fast this all went by...**_

_**Well keep reviewing guys! It's ending and I would love to see how many reviews I can get before then...(: Don't be afraid to criticize as well, I love getting constructive criticism, seeing as it helps me grow as a writer.**_

_**Add to favorites and PM me any suggestions for the epilogue! Love you all. :D**_

_**Bye! CHAIR MODE: ACTIVATED. BOOP.**_


	39. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

_To avoid the same string of events ever happening the Capitol drugged the food that the citizens of Panem ate to make them forget about the 24 fallen tributes, forcing them believe that they had died during the rebellion. The very next year the Capitol held the '1__st__ Annual Hunger Games' once again, or at least that's what everyone thought. The Hunger Games continued on for 75 horrible years after this._

_Those surviving in District 13 who had been watching the Games didn't get their memories wiped by the Capitol. Some passed it on to the newer generations, and they kept passing it down. The 24 deaths helped fuel the rebellion that freed the Districts._

_Lily committing suicide set off a string of events back in District 4. This is what happened in her father's point of view._

As I watch the Games I almost can't believe my eyes. I had thought that I didn't care when Lily had been Reaped, but watching her fight makes my eyes water.

She has killed 2 people and I never would have thought that my baby, my little Lily Pad, had that kind of monster in her. But I know that she thought I never had a monster in me before Sharon started telling me to beat her.

I want to help her, just reach through the screen and pull her out every time there's any sign of danger, but I can't.

"Ha, the little skank deserved it." Sharon says when Lily gets bitten by the mutation of a fish. I just about lose it with her.

"Get out of my house." I say, eyes glued to the screen as my little baby lays there, dying.

"What did you just say to me?"

"I said, get out of my house."

"It's my house too you know!"

"No, it's not. I made you sign a form, stating that if we split up then I get everything I brought into the marriage. That means all of my money and the house."

"Well we're not broken up."

"I beg to differ. I'm getting the forms from the Justice Building right after this ends." Watching my Lily Pad go in and talk to this Rhett boy about what Sharon did to me, I have realized a lot of things. It feels good to stand up to Sharon, and maybe I should have listened to Lily earlier. Maybe I should have gotten rid of Sharon earlier. Maybe I never should have married her. Maybe I never should have neglected my daughter.

"Oh no you're not!"

"You can't tell me what to do, Sharon." I keep my voice calm, and I'm still watching the screen.

She shrieks and goes off to our bedroom where she had put a television. The twins didn't hear us because they were in their room, where she had put another television.

I can't peel my eyes away as the boy gives my baby medicine and I cry when she wakes up and doesn't remember a thing. When it's over I head to the Justice Building and at least a dozen different people offer their condolences to me about Lily not remembering anything. They apologies mean nothing to me, because they don't bring her to me. I get the papers and fill out everything; all I need is Sharon's signature. When I get home she gladly signs off on it and I take it back to get it approved. When I get home I stuff the only things Sharon had owned when we met into a bag and send her off with the twins. _They don't even look like me, how could I have ever thought that they were mine?_

I keep watching every single day of the Games, never able to look away. Now here I am, watching as my little baby is dying there. I sit right in front of the screen, stroking her face when they have a close up on her. Tears run down my cheeks as I sit here, not able to help her. She mumbles something inaudible, but then she whispers, "Daddy, I forgive you." I break down. Her cannon goes off as Waldemar Frobisher narrates, confused on what just happened. The program ends and I hold my face in my hands, crying nonstop.

Janice, her best friend, shows up a little while later, also crying.

"Oh my gosh, Mr. Gallina I'm so sorry about Lily! I shouldn't have started to hate her after she said goodbye! I'm sure she hadn't meant anything by it, but I mean like…" She doesn't know what else to say, so she just starts to break down and cries even more.

"I'm going to miss her," Janice eventually says as she is leaving half an hour later.

"I will too, Janice. I will too."

That night I can't get to sleep. I miss my little baby Lily Pad too much, and the house feels so empty without anyone else in it. My family is dead, and for the past 8 years the last connection I'd had to my family was my daughter. Yet I had still pushed her away, and now she's gone.

The next few days I wander around the town, looking at places where I had spent time with my family. Sometimes I swear I see Lily alive and well, laughing or just having fun. I run to those spots, calling out her name, but then she disappears and I fall to my knees, face in hands as I cry. People just stare at me in pity, but don't ever really stop and help. Why doesn't she hear me? Why doesn't she see me? Is she ignoring me? I don't understand. Maybe she's pushing me away like I did to her.

One day a woman around my age stops and helps me when this happens, but she doesn't apologize about Lily's death. She must have lost a loved one, because only those who have lost one know that condolences only make it worse.

Her name is Lilibeth, and we grow close over the next few years. We comfort each other since she had lost her husband and son in the rebellion, but I don't ever forget about Lily. Everyone seems to have forgotten about the tributes, and the next year seems to be a redo. I'm not sure what's going on, but I never forget about my innocent little baby girl.

Nobody believes me when I say that Lily was a tribute in the Hunger Games and had died there except for Lilibeth. They all think that I'm a madman or something, maybe they're right.

Well, even if everyone else forgets, I promise that I will never forget about my little girl.

_Mr. Gallina and Lilibeth got married and had one child. They named her Hope Arista Gallina._

_They grew to an old age and died together._

_Like he had promised, Mr. Gallina never forgot about his precious little Lily Pad._

_**(': I'm so sad that this is over, but I'm kind of happy that at least one person got a happy ending.**_

_**Well I had a blast writing this story for you guys, I couldn't have done it without all of your support and reviews. Feel free to keep reviewing, I would love that!(: Thanks for sticking with this story for so long, I'm sorry if the ending wasn't everything that you expected it to be.**_

_**Well if you liked it add to favorites and stuff. Well PM me if there's some questions that I left unanswered for you, sorry if I did. I know I probably did… :p**_

_**Well I love all of you guys! Byee! One final bro fist for this story? I believe so. BRO FIST!**_


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